Upper-Middle Class Guy with a Super-Wealthy Girlfriend (wife, marriage, woman)
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I've been debating about whether to open an account and post about this for a while. I am a senior in college who is in love for pretty much the first time. My girlfriend and I have been thinking about our futures, and I only have one real difficulty/concern regarding the relationship.
I come from a very nice middle-upper class family in Ohio, but my girlfriend comes from a super-rich family in Miami. I've gotten pretty much everything I've ever asked for, but I've also been raised with a huge amount of Midwestern practicality. Needless to say, watching her dad hand her a $10k Cartier bracelet today was, umm, quite an experience. That is just the tip of the iceberg though. While I'm accustomed to a nice lifestyle and have been blessed with so much, her parents have handed everything to her (cars, shoes, purses, Heat season tickets, etc.) on a silver platter... sometimes literally.
Even though she didn't ask for 95% of any of these gifts, I'm worried that she is so used to that kind of lifestyle, that she might be in for a shock in the real world. She is honestly the sweetest girl I have ever met and constantly tells me that she's not hung up about material possessions. I'm just afraid that IF the time comes when marriage is even on the table, she will be sorely disappointed if I can't afford the lifestyle she's been raised with. Essentially, she and brothers seem so well adjusted, but her parents seem devoted to materialism.
Am being paranoid or is this a legitimate fear? Any responses are much appreciated!
Has she ever given requests or "nudges" towards you buying something expensive for her?
I wouldn't talk to her about it right away like " if i'm going to be marrying you then blah blah blah" because that puts a lot of pressure on a woman, just that word marriage changes the entire aspect even if you haven't proposed yet.
I would say talk to her about it when the time comes and let her know that even though you may not be able to provide her with 10k$ jewelry, you always provide her the best friend of her life.
We've been together for almost a year, but marriage is still a long way off since we both want to go to professional school as of right now.
She has never ever nudged me to buy anything for her either, which is why I might be acting silly about this whole thing.
Your last sentence is spot-on too. Her Christmas gifts to me were a golf glove, a picture of us, and a framed Scrabble board with my family member's names on it. I'm just wondering how she can be so well-adjusted if her parents seem so materialistic.
We've been together for almost a year, but marriage is still a long way off since we both want to go to professional school as of right now.
She has never ever nudged me to buy anything for her either, which is why I might be acting silly about this whole thing.
Your last sentence is spot-on too. Her Christmas gifts to me were a golf glove, a picture of us, and a framed Scrabble board with my family member's names on it. I'm just wondering how she can be so well-adjusted if her parents seem so materialistic.
it could be she already understands and holds her parents on a different level of requirements than she holds you. not that that is a bad thing either. She may expect that her parents would get her expensive things because they are well off. Not every woman with a rich family is a beverly hills housewife
We've been together for almost a year, but marriage is still a long way off since we both want to go to professional school as of right now.
She has never ever nudged me to buy anything for her either, which is why I might be acting silly about this whole thing.
Your last sentence is spot-on too. Her Christmas gifts to me were a golf glove, a picture of us, and a framed Scrabble board with my family member's names on it. I'm just wondering how she can be so well-adjusted if her parents seem so materialistic.
She seems pretty modest to me with those types of gifts. Plus, it sounds like she'll be making her own money.
Cut the sweetest, most well adjusted girl some slack. I think you obviously know she won't be like this.
She seems pretty modest to me with those types of gifts. Plus, it sounds like she'll be making her own money.
Cut the sweetest, most well adjusted girl some slack. I think you obviously know she won't be like this.
You're absolutely right, I think that this is probably my own stupidity getting in the way, per usual. Just a tough situation, but I think I'm learning a lot about myself through the process. Thank you!
You're absolutely right, I think that this is probably my own stupidity getting in the way, per usual. Just a tough situation, but I think I'm learning a lot about myself through the process. Thank you!
you may never know, but it could also be she doesn't because you aren't married! some girls flip a switch when marriage happens and the rules change.
We've been together for almost a year, but marriage is still a long way off since we both want to go to professional school as of right now.
She has never ever nudged me to buy anything for her either, which is why I might be acting silly about this whole thing.
Your last sentence is spot-on too. Her Christmas gifts to me were a golf glove, a picture of us, and a framed Scrabble board with my family member's names on it. I'm just wondering how she can be so well-adjusted if her parents seem so materialistic.
I'll be honest. The fact that you may end up in different graduate schools may mean this won't even last. You're still very young. I would not be thinking about marriage period.
If you have a good read on your girlfriend, I wouldn't worry so much about her. However, if you do get married, you should be worried about the in-laws. People who can make this amount of money are usually quite manipulative and controlling and will see no problems in trying to have their way with everyone. If you think they are the type of people to judge someone by their net worth, your relative lack of money will become an issue eventually.
Your last sentence is spot-on too. Her Christmas gifts to me were a golf glove, a picture of us, and a framed Scrabble board with my family member's names on it. I'm just wondering how she can be so well-adjusted if her parents seem so materialistic.
Wtf, some other girl I know gave this to her bf. It must have been on some girl website or "Pintrest" or something, lol.
It's a good sign that she gave you that stuff instead of expensive things. She might be legit...
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