Question for men who don't want to date easy women (loving, couple)
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Lets go back to the original comment I responded to. What is a good way to determine if a someone is going to be committed to you, long term? In my eyes, if someone sticks around after months of not having sex, it is a pretty good indication they want you as a person, more than what you have between your legs. Again this whole conversation is in the scope of long term relationships.
There is no way to determine that. Much about love and relationships is based on hope, and the trust in that moment that you're making the right decision for your life. You have no way of knowing when or how things could change in the future.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,925,282 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Grizzly Addams
In my opinion, in committed long term relationships the other persons abilities should be enough. There is always ways to spice it up in the bedroom. However the emotional connection is what it is, there is no experimenting with emotions. You either truly want to be with that person, or you don't.
I'm not talking about "spicing it up", but sex is just not a big deal to you. We just differ on that. I think life is too short for lousy sex. If I love someone and we don't have good sex, we should be good platonic friends.
No, they aren't JUST about sexual compatibility. That isn't enough.
BUT, you won't find a GOOD relationship that doesn't include sexual compatibility.
Not having it is a deal breaker. It is a must.
Otherwise, be friends.
Sexual compatibility often comes about when couples actually COMMUNICATE what they want and a person is in a more secure environment to express themselves. Good sex does happen over time. But if the other areas of your relationship are not sound then chances are the sex isn't going to be either.
There is no way to determine that. Much about love and relationships is based on hope, and the trust in that moment that you're making the right decision for your life. You have no way of knowing when or how things could change in the future.
I agree, but if holding out on sex for a couple months makes someone run for the hills, you potentially saved yourself years.
I'm not talking about "spicing it up", but sex is just not a big deal to you. We just differ on that. I think life is too short for lousy sex. If I love someone and we don't have good sex, we should be good platonic friends.
Hey I love sex and am not trying to downplay it. I just think the emotional connection is much more important. If I were in a relationship with good sex, but I couldn't stand being around her otherwise, then that relationship would be hollow and worthless.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,925,282 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007
Sexual compatibility often comes about when couples actually COMMUNICATE what they want and a person is in a more secure environment to express themselves. Good sex does happen over time. But if the other areas of your relationship are not sound then chances are the sex isn't going to be either.
It can improve, yes, absolutely it can. But at their core, many times people are just on different pages. It happens a lot, and no amount of communication, trust, and comfort over time is going to change that. Believe me, I've tried, and I've heard of many friends trying. Lots of times you're just too different.
I'm not talking about "spicing it up", but sex is just not a big deal to you. We just differ on that. I think life is too short for lousy sex. If I love someone and we don't have good sex, we should be good platonic friends.
I'm going to go out on a limb here (and probably get blasted for it) and say I bet Grizzly is having better sex then you'll ever experience.
Lets go back to the original comment I responded to. What is a good way to determine if a someone is going to be committed to you, long term? In my eyes, if someone sticks around after months of not having sex, it is a pretty good indication they want you as a person, more than what you have between your legs. Again this whole conversation is in the scope of long term relationships.
And whose to say they're not out having sex with other people while 'waiting' for the person they're dating?
That is something that holding out on sex for a while would have solved.
If you have 15 minutes for lunch does one tend to go for fast food or the chop house? What we are witnessing is a basic decay of the nervous system in a large swath of the population. Patrons at a fast food restaurant may either be pressed for time or not. However at the chop house no one can be pressed for time.
No doubt we will discover the anecdotes which are accounted for. Not everyone who eats fast food is in a hurry.
However in my society natural selection seems to be considered a myth from feminists to Monsanto to young earth creationists.
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,925,282 times
Reputation: 40635
Quote:
Originally Posted by Thursday007
I'm going to go out on a limb here (and probably get blasted for it) and say I bet Grizzly is having better sex then you'll ever experience.
You can believe what you wish. Some of us want both deep emotional connections AND amazing blow your mind sex. I hope he is having excellent sex. I'm having good sex, but not the best I've ever had right now. That's fine, there are always ups and downs in life. I won't settle though.
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