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Old 01-14-2014, 08:59 AM
 
Location: Scottsdale, AZ
16,961 posts, read 17,337,436 times
Reputation: 30258

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What if he felt the way you do; just hates driving.

Dutch driving
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Old 01-14-2014, 08:59 AM
 
2,087 posts, read 2,849,036 times
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Imagine how it would be if a man said that he hated driving and expected a woman to pick him up for a date.

I'm pretty sure he'd be laughed out of the dating world.

There's your answer.
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:00 AM
 
14,078 posts, read 16,607,365 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by findly185 View Post
So suggest somewhere near you to go out (5/10 min) and drive yourself. Problem solved.
We met somewhere in my town for the first date. Now he's suggesting "meeting" in his town which is problematic for me. It's not so much that I hate driving but it's more that I have a phobia of driving certain places and his town is one of them. He doesn't know that though because I haven't told him.
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:00 AM
 
11,865 posts, read 16,998,989 times
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Unreasonable and pretty selfish.

I would never think to ask a man to drive an extra 20 miles out of his way for a date just because I don't want to drive.
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:01 AM
 
Location: Canada
11,795 posts, read 12,028,825 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fleetiebelle View Post
Are you at least offering gas money to these guys? I'd feel terrible asking someone to drive across town to pick me up, then drive somewhere else, then drive me home when I could easily meet him somewhere. Plus, if we're talking the first few dates, until things are a bit more established I wouldn't necessarily want him to know where I live.
^^^this. And also, I just feel it's wrong to expect a guy, after your first date, to become your personal chauffeur because you don't like driving.
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:02 AM
 
4,217 posts, read 7,300,562 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
We met somewhere in my town for the first date. Now he's suggesting "meeting" in his town which is problematic for me. It's not so much that I hate driving but it's more that I have a phobia of driving certain places and his town is one of them. He doesn't know that though because I haven't told him.
Are you willing to pay for dinner/date if he drives?

You cant be asking for everything and give nothing in return.

I think that would be a fair compromise.
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:04 AM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
7,844 posts, read 13,233,514 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
I usually drive to meet the guy on the first date if I meet him online, but after that, I prefer to be picked up because I just hate driving. If a guy lives 20 miles away and wants to do a date activity on his side of town, is it unreasonable for me to prefer that he drives to pick me up, drives us to the date location, drives me back home, and then drives himself back home? I just feel like meeting up instead of driving together seems less date-like. I know some men don't really mind driving, but others might. Do you all (men and women) have preferences regarding who does the driving? Do you think it's rude if a man doesn't want to pick a woman up for a date?

Why not compromise and take turns or meet in the middle once in a while? If the guy has no problem what-so-ever picking you up every time and driving over 20 miles each way then that should be up to him. I would never ask a date to drive that much. And if he's going to drive to you then maybe you can find things to do in your area or nearby. Where I live a 6 mile drive has taken an hour depending on traffic.

I don't think it's rude if he doesn't want to pick you up for every single date. It's inconsiderate to not keep in mind the wear and tear that he's putting on his car not to mention how much he's spending on gas.

If you hate driving that much take a cab or bus or train.
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:05 AM
 
14,078 posts, read 16,607,365 times
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Quote:
Originally Posted by findly185 View Post
Are you willing to pay for dinner/date if he drives?

You cant be asking for everything and give nothing in return.

I think that would be a fair compromise.
Yes, I'm willing to contribute to expenses.
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:07 AM
 
Location: Long Island, NY
7,844 posts, read 13,233,514 times
Reputation: 9247
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sweet Like Sugar View Post
We met somewhere in my town for the first date. Now he's suggesting "meeting" in his town which is problematic for me. It's not so much that I hate driving but it's more that I have a phobia of driving certain places and his town is one of them. He doesn't know that though because I haven't told him.

What's the problem with his town?
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Old 01-14-2014, 09:08 AM
 
35,095 posts, read 51,230,433 times
Reputation: 62669
I don't see why you can't meet him when something is closer to his home. Maybe not every time but a few times would be fine.
Personally I never was picked up for a date, I always met them where we were going. I like to have my own way home, I have a handicapped Mother and was always available if something happened to her and I was needed. That way I could leave immediately and he could do whatever he wanted after I left. Also, it saved me a lot of dull dates since I had my own vehicle I could leave if we really were not having a good time.
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