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So suggest somewhere near you to go out (5/10 min) and drive yourself. Problem solved.
We met somewhere in my town for the first date. Now he's suggesting "meeting" in his town which is problematic for me. It's not so much that I hate driving but it's more that I have a phobia of driving certain places and his town is one of them. He doesn't know that though because I haven't told him.
Are you at least offering gas money to these guys? I'd feel terrible asking someone to drive across town to pick me up, then drive somewhere else, then drive me home when I could easily meet him somewhere. Plus, if we're talking the first few dates, until things are a bit more established I wouldn't necessarily want him to know where I live.
^^^this. And also, I just feel it's wrong to expect a guy, after your first date, to become your personal chauffeur because you don't like driving.
We met somewhere in my town for the first date. Now he's suggesting "meeting" in his town which is problematic for me. It's not so much that I hate driving but it's more that I have a phobia of driving certain places and his town is one of them. He doesn't know that though because I haven't told him.
Are you willing to pay for dinner/date if he drives?
You cant be asking for everything and give nothing in return.
I usually drive to meet the guy on the first date if I meet him online, but after that, I prefer to be picked up because I just hate driving. If a guy lives 20 miles away and wants to do a date activity on his side of town, is it unreasonable for me to prefer that he drives to pick me up, drives us to the date location, drives me back home, and then drives himself back home? I just feel like meeting up instead of driving together seems less date-like. I know some men don't really mind driving, but others might. Do you all (men and women) have preferences regarding who does the driving? Do you think it's rude if a man doesn't want to pick a woman up for a date?
Why not compromise and take turns or meet in the middle once in a while? If the guy has no problem what-so-ever picking you up every time and driving over 20 miles each way then that should be up to him. I would never ask a date to drive that much. And if he's going to drive to you then maybe you can find things to do in your area or nearby. Where I live a 6 mile drive has taken an hour depending on traffic.
I don't think it's rude if he doesn't want to pick you up for every single date. It's inconsiderate to not keep in mind the wear and tear that he's putting on his car not to mention how much he's spending on gas.
If you hate driving that much take a cab or bus or train.
We met somewhere in my town for the first date. Now he's suggesting "meeting" in his town which is problematic for me. It's not so much that I hate driving but it's more that I have a phobia of driving certain places and his town is one of them. He doesn't know that though because I haven't told him.
I don't see why you can't meet him when something is closer to his home. Maybe not every time but a few times would be fine.
Personally I never was picked up for a date, I always met them where we were going. I like to have my own way home, I have a handicapped Mother and was always available if something happened to her and I was needed. That way I could leave immediately and he could do whatever he wanted after I left. Also, it saved me a lot of dull dates since I had my own vehicle I could leave if we really were not having a good time.
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