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People don't really want just sex. What they're after is a close physical relationship that has an emotional bond that draws them to someone else, such that sex is about so much more than just, well, orgasm.
People literally crave it, to an insane extent. It warps their minds, causing them to become sexual predators, or simply people that go from relationship to relationship never understanding that they have to stay in one place to make it work. You won't ever find that by moving around. Then they become scared when they realize at some level that what they want is actually going to be found, and then it's another man or woman... et cetera, a million times over.
So, to that extent, no, sex isn't that important. Any more than a car is important-- if you have nowhere to go, do you really need it?
People don't really want just sex. What they're after is a close physical relationship that has an emotional bond that draws them to someone else, such that sex is about so much more than just, well, orgasm.
In that case, what they are after is that emotional "high" they get from having somebody idealize them, which is what happens for three months when a relationship is new. These people are narcissists. They aren't capable of giving or sharing or any type or real emotional closeness. It's all pretend.
Or sometimes the only thing they want is validation. They want to feel attractive. I've had people interested in me only because I won't sleep with them. How tedious is that?
And sometimes people get addicted to sex. It has nothing to do with emotional closeness at all. It's a compulsion. Sex functions like a drug.
Location: Jonquil City (aka Smyrna) Georgia- by Atlanta
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey
It may not be the most important- in a marriage- but loss of intimacy- and alienation, is the death knell- for a marriage.
JMHO.
Not true. If the marriage was based on really deeply true love, it will survive without sex. What about the soldiers that return from war injured in ways that prevent them from sex? Are you saying that their marriages will all end?
I disagree. I don't think this applies to all people. I have no reproductive instinct. I assume lots of people do (hence the desire to engage in sexual intercourse), and I suppose someone has to if the species were to continue, but then I don't see why it's absolutely necessary for it to continue, to be honest.
Quote:
What are the 3 qualities that you should look in a person? (in order of importance)
1 Spiritual affinity
2 Affinity of ideals
3 Physical attraction
imho these are the 3 keys for a long and true relationship based on love, respect and mutual admiration, but what are your thoughts?
Well...this is hard to say. I'm really unsure of how to put them in order. It's important to me to be emotionally attracted to the person. I find myself feeling that way about people who are passionate and emotive like I am. I also need the person to be honest, open, and loyal. I also couldn't stay in any close relationship in which the other person has problems being affectionate.
I disagree. I don't think this applies to all people. I have no reproductive instinct. I assume lots of people do (hence the desire to engage in sexual intercourse), and I suppose someone has to if the species were to continue, but then I don't see why it's absolutely necessary for it to continue, to be honest.
So that puts you, Greenie and myself in the "Keep the babies far away from me" category
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