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If by "now" you mean "since the beginning of time," yes. This has always gone on, you just didn't participate in it, evidently.
Right, I was married in my early 20's and was inexperienced. Had a great marriage and a great sex life. Should I decide to date again, I don't see myself inviting a bunch of men to my bed. I know my husband would want me to fall in love again, but he'd be shuddering in the grave if I changed that way!
Right, I was married in my early 20's and was inexperienced. Had a great marriage and a great sex life. Should I decide to date again, I don't see myself inviting a bunch of men to my bed.
Nothing wrong with that. Do whatever works for you. It's good to be aware of the range of what's out there, though. Sorry to hear about your loss.
So it used to be go grab a cup of coffee or a drink to see if you enjoy each other's company enough to date. Now its have sex? LOL Oh gawd I have a lot to learn.
Don't mistake me - women aren't sleeping with every guy we go on a date with. You don't have to do anything you want to do, but you have the option.
I've dated a lot of guys but only slept with a small fraction of those. I just know what I want and am not afraid to go after it when I know it's right.
I've known many people who have sex on the first date and go on to get married or be together for awhile. I've also heard guys say they would never be with a girl who had sex on the first date long term because they figure she's a wh*re and if she's easy for him they assume she's that easy with everyone.
I guess I'm curious where most guys fall in their thinking about this. I tend to usually sleep with a guy on a first date and it's never really worked out. I want to stop doing it. I am dating this new guy and we had our first date today. Although we have actually been texting and skyping just about every day for a month. It was really a wonderful date and I had an awesome time. We eventually got food and went back to my house. We ended up pretty heavily making out and fooling around, but not actually having sex. I'm really worried I ruined it with him now
What do you think of guys who have sex on the first date? Do you think they are wh*res? If a man has sex with you on a first date, and then doesn't see you as worthy of a significant relationship because of the sex, what does that say about him?
I would guess men who think like that WISH they could have sex with more women on a first date, but don't, so they rationalize their failure by convincing themselves that you must be a sl*t.
This, to me, is reflective of an immature individual who is not ready for a significant relationship.
I've known many people who have sex on the first date and go on to get married or be together for awhile. I've also heard guys say they would never be with a girl who had sex on the first date long term because they figure she's a wh*re and if she's easy for him they assume she's that easy with everyone.
I guess I'm curious where most guys fall in their thinking about this. I tend to usually sleep with a guy on a first date and it's never really worked out. I want to stop doing it. I am dating this new guy and we had our first date today. Although we have actually been texting and skyping just about every day for a month. It was really a wonderful date and I had an awesome time. We eventually got food and went back to my house. We ended up pretty heavily making out and fooling around, but not actually having sex. I'm really worried I ruined it with him now
Count me in with the bolded.
Current relationship (long distance) is coming up on 6 months. We slept together on the first date because it felt right to us.
Agree with the posters who mentioned 3 dates and early on.
If it dosen't happen by then I don't think it would work for me long term. I am not into game playing.
I recommend to go with the flow. If it feels right just do it. Chances are it's not going to work out anyway so I'm not buying that sex on the first date was the reason if nothing develops.
Yeah...Two of my long term relationships started with hookups (or bangs, to quote minx) before we went on any actual dates. Both were more than a decade ago, in my 20's, before I ever did online dating. One was a grad school classmate with whom I had been friends for a few years, so we already knew each other fairly well. She gave me a ride home from a party, I invited her in, and the rest was history. The other was a friend-of-a-friend who I met at a concert. We hooked up the night we met and stayed together for a couple of years after that.
This was the norm in my social circles as a 20-something in the 90's and early 2000's. I didn't really go on many traditional "dates" until I started using dating websites in my 30's. This is why I laugh when the media talks about "the hookup culture" as if it's some kind of new Millennial thing. We Gen X'ers always did it, we just didn't call it that.
I, too, am a Gen Xer, and probably around your age. Yes, our generation did the hook-up thing or had, as it was called then, one-night stands. I think the boomers did their fair share of the "free love" thing too.
The difference is that, for us, hooking up was as common as was dating one person exclusively for a certain length of time (ranging from weeks to a year or two). Now, it seems that "hooking up" is the norm, and the only acceptable form of intimacy among Millennials. There's nothing wrong with "hooking up," as long as no one feels pressured to do so. I think the problem is that there are teens and twenty-somethings, especially females, who feel they HAVE to hook up to be accepted or to be considered "normal."
The difference is that, for us, hooking up was as common as was dating one person exclusively for a certain length of time (ranging from weeks to a year or two). Now, it seems that "hooking up" is the norm, and the only acceptable form of intimacy among Millennials. There's nothing wrong with "hooking up," as long as no one feels pressured to do so. I think the problem is that there are teens and twenty-somethings, especially females, who feel they HAVE to hook up to be accepted or to be considered "normal."
Actually, articles and statistics have been posted on this forum that show that people who do casual hookups are in the minority. It's something the media latches onto, though, so the media give the impression everyone's doing it. None of the Millennials I know are into that, though.
I, too, am a Gen Xer, and probably around your age. Yes, our generation did the hook-up thing or had, as it was called then, one-night stands. I think the boomers did their fair share of the "free love" thing too.
The difference is that, for us, hooking up was as common as was dating one person exclusively for a certain length of time (ranging from weeks to a year or two). Now, it seems that "hooking up" is the norm, and the only acceptable form of intimacy among Millennials. There's nothing wrong with "hooking up," as long as no one feels pressured to do so. I think the problem is that there are teens and twenty-somethings, especially females, who feel they HAVE to hook up to be accepted or to be considered "normal."
I work with Millennials (college students) daily and hear all about their exploits. I'm telling you, from what I hear, it really doesn't sound much different to me than 20 years ago. Some people hook up, some people date, some people do both, some people are virgins, some people are with a different partner every weekend, etc. etc. etc.
On thing that is different is that more young people now are identifying as asexual, pansexual, or genderqueer, among other things, but I think it's a good thing that people can be more open about stuff like that than they could in the past.
I, too, am a Gen Xer, and probably around your age. Yes, our generation did the hook-up thing or had, as it was called then, one-night stands. I think the boomers did their fair share of the "free love" thing too.
The difference is that, for us, hooking up was as common as was dating one person exclusively for a certain length of time (ranging from weeks to a year or two). Now, it seems that "hooking up" is the norm, and the only acceptable form of intimacy among Millennials. There's nothing wrong with "hooking up," as long as no one feels pressured to do so. I think the problem is that there are teens and twenty-somethings, especially females, who feel they HAVE to hook up to be accepted or to be considered "normal."
It's called hooking up now, but back in the day it was casual sex. I'm an Xer too.
And you are right, back then it was something people wanted to do, whereas now it feels as though there's some shame if you don't do it (for young people).
Many of my experiences at this time were this. I was meeting women out somewhere. And hooking up with in hours, we aren't even talking with each other. I'm afraid to even go in to the details with out hearing a bunch of crap about it from some faction here, but some of these interactions didn't even involve a place that had a bed. More like a bathroom stall, or an alley.
Do tell! This is the only post that caught my attention. Were you doing porn?
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This has always gone on, you just didn't participate in it, evidently.
