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He doesn't know that I'm a virgin, his wife left simply because she was not from our country and was homesick, so she went back to her country. That's it, she doesn't want to comeback here he didn't want to go back there with her neither
Coming from a guy...you'll probably regret sleeping with him if you value the relationship that you have. I'm not saying he's a bad guy but his wife is gone and he knows she's not coming back yet he won't get a divorce and formally move on with his life. If you sleep with him without being in a relationship you run the risk of losing him as a friend if he's only interested in sleeping with you and nothing beyond that.
No, he sounds like a friend who's trying to get into your pants.
Personally, I wouldn't want to get intimate with someone who doesn't want to discuss my (very valid) concerns until AFTER he finally pushed me into a sexual relationship. There's something cold about that, that says he doesn't have your interests at heart, like a friend should. I would avoid this guy, myself.
Trust me, he knows you're a virgin. He also knows what he wants and cares less about what you want. Be smart about this and listen to the advice of the people here. There is a better man out there willing to be with you and show you what a REAL relationship is without the headache of FWB.
No I don't think he knows, before I tell him I was single, he even assumed that I was in a relationship with someone. However I don't know how he guessed that I have a lack of self esteem
Yeah, that's the other thing, OP. Sex tends to cause love or attachment, even though you may go into it thinking that's not what you want. And your "friend", being the somewhat cold type as it sounds, probably wouldn't become attached. So the relationship would be unequal. There's that risk. Just something more to think about. These FWB things sound great on paper, but what you rarely hear about (unless you're on C-D, lol) is that half the time, one of the parties involved will develop feelings for the other, and will end up miserable because of it. Sometimes it's the guy, sometimes the girl.
Well I'm glad I did post on here, you guys made valid points, and since I haven't shared this story to any of my friends, I did not have any inputs. Well some of the things I've read hurt a little but yeah lol
Vintage_girls right cakeitup...why is it you feel that it's sooo necessary for you to lose your virginity?..It's not a bad thing, it's not a shameful thing, there's no "deadline" that must be met for you to be considered "normal".
You think he's a "great guy"...do you think that your having sex with him is going to make it better for him?..because his "last relationship hurted him"?..what about you? You could end up hurt as well, if he decides to just use you until he finds someone else he really cares about...not just for their sexual "willingness", but for their feelings as well.
It's not that it is necessary it's just that I really want it, I was just thinking about myself to be honest, I want to experience sex, I've found a guy that I'm attracted to, who is attracted to me too, that I know quite well, I did not think about the possibility that I could fall in love with him nor the fact that he could be using me nor that he really cares about me, but after reading everybody's opinions on it, I will not sleep with him. I'm actually kind of disgusted and I'm about to delete his phone number
Yes he doesn't know what he want but neither do I.. Yes he's still married but his wife is far away and won't comeback. I do want love but I'm not dumb I'm not expecting it from him I just wanted to know, according to you guys, if having a fwb as a first sex experience/relationship would be a bad idea ?
People will treat you the way you allow them to. In this scenario you are basically saying you are worth no more than a warm hole for a married guy who's a long way from his wife to stick it in. If he liked you, he could get a divorce and be your boyfriend. He doesn't like you. He just wants to use you for sex. Don't lower yourself to this. You will wind up with feelings for him, and feel very used when he is still in love with and married to his wife 6 months later.
P.S.-Women getting into bed with men unless they are planning on sex is a really dumb idea. It sends a confusing message. Do not get in bed with someone unless you are ready for sex.
It's not that it is necessary it's just that I really want it, I was just thinking about myself to be honest, I want to experience sex, I've found a guy that I'm attracted to, who is attracted to me too, that I know quite well, I did not think about the possibility that I could fall in love with him nor the fact that he could be using me nor that he really cares about me, but after reading everybody's opinions on it, I will not sleep with him. I'm actually kind of disgusted and I'm about to delete his phone number
Well, if it's something you really want (to experience sex) then I guess someone you know, and are attracted to could help you with that...as long as you realize and accept that there can't/won't be any strings attached..there's nothing wrong with wanting to experience sex
It could be more rewarding for you though, if you waited, and found someone who cares about your brain as much as your body..and wants to love ALL of you....but that's really your choice..just be careful, and above all else love and respect yourself.
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