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This question is not necessarily about marriage, but more of the whole concept of deciding to be exclusive with one person, deciding to 'settle down' means to me: not wanting to continue to 'look', to be okay with the reality of that one person being the person you want to be with, that you prefer to be with, that you enjoy.
Is this such an outrageous concept? Is monogamy scary? Why?
Monogamy isn't my issue. I've had several LT committed relationships. It's the idea of monogamy with one person for a longer period of time than I am comfortable with.
This question is not necessarily about marriage, but more of the whole concept of deciding to be exclusive with one person, deciding to 'settle down' means to me: not wanting to continue to 'look', to be okay with the reality of that one person being the person you want to be with, that you prefer to be with, that you enjoy.
Is this such an outrageous concept? Is monogamy scary? Why?
Monogamy is scary for many because they have eyes a brain and a working sex organ.
Aka: they know they are attracted to many people and simple do not want to be "locked" in to something they won't be able to uphold. Some are scared some are just smart and realize it's going to end in flames for them.
Monogamy isn't my issue. I've had several LT committed relationships. It's the idea of monogamy with one person for a longer period of time than I am comfortable with.
Are you saying a longer period of time with one person than you are comfortable with? Or are you saying a longer period of time with someone that you aren't comfortable with?
Yes, thats true there are all sorts of people and all sorts of needs and wants, thats not why I posted this question...I am asking because I'd like some insight into the process...
Are you saying a longer period of time with one person than you are comfortable with? Or are you saying a longer period of time with someone that you aren't comfortable with?
Either. I tend to have a strict cut off point in which I chose to leave a LTR to date again. I just don't find myself ever being with one man for say 10 years.
Monogamy is scary for many because they have eyes a brain and a working sex organ.
Aka: they know they are attracted to many people and simple do not want to be "locked" in to something they won't be able to uphold. Some are scared some are just smart and realize it's going to end in flames for them.
I don't understand, how can you tell its going to end in flames when you are just getting started? Isn't there ever a time when you kind of lock-down and TRY to have something long term and exclusive, or do you assume that its going to end in tears from the start?
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