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Old 02-16-2014, 06:51 AM
 
Location: St Thomas, US Virgin Islands
24,665 posts, read 69,572,713 times
Reputation: 26727

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Apart from adoption have you considered being a Big Sister, a foster parent?

14 hour shifts means you'll have at most only a scant few hours a day to be a parent (14 hour shift + 6-8 hours sleep leaves max 4 hours/day). Do you really think that's enough time to be a parent?

Why do you want a child? You didn't address that.
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Old 02-16-2014, 06:29 PM
 
12,573 posts, read 15,534,448 times
Reputation: 8960
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyYouNurse View Post
I am new to this forum, have been spying on conversations for a while but never have posted anything until now. Sorry upfront if this topic has been talked about before, I tried searching but couldn’t find anything.
I am a 33 year old single female, I own my house, works as an ICU nurse, I am currently going to school for my Bachelor’s and will eventually get my Masters in Nurse Practitioner. The reason I state these things is not to brag or anything just simply to state that I am in right mind and I did not take this lightly. One of my many flaws is that my “guy picker” is broken, I seem to go for the guys that are not good for me. Examples would be: One guy is currently in jail, one is having a third child with the girl he cheated on me with, one was physically/emotionally abusive etc.
I want a child and since my guy picker is broken I have been looking at artificial insemination. My question for the guys is have you ever done this? What is the benefit to you? I get the product of your donation but you only get a little bit of money and maybe 18 years of wondering what your child looks like, I am doing the open donation which means the child is able to contact the donor when they turn 18 but only if the child wants to. The place I am doing this actually has staff impressions comments and one donor did state that he and his wife was able to produce a beautiful child and they felt it was important to let others experience that bond. This makes since to me, but not all of them have had previous children so what is their reasoning?
Also would it be harder for men to date women who has done the artificial insemination compared to someone who had children from a previous relationship?
Understand that artifical insemination will not make you any better at choosing guys unless you plan on never dating again, which means you should do that now because your poor choices in men may endanger the child.
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Old 02-16-2014, 06:59 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,589,342 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyYouNurse View Post
I am new to this forum, have been spying on conversations for a while but never have posted anything until now. Sorry upfront if this topic has been talked about before, I tried searching but couldn’t find anything.
I am a 33 year old single female, I own my house, works as an ICU nurse, I am currently going to school for my Bachelor’s and will eventually get my Masters in Nurse Practitioner. The reason I state these things is not to brag or anything just simply to state that I am in right mind and I did not take this lightly. One of my many flaws is that my “guy picker” is broken, I seem to go for the guys that are not good for me. Examples would be: One guy is currently in jail, one is having a third child with the girl he cheated on me with, one was physically/emotionally abusive etc.
I want a child and since my guy picker is broken I have been looking at artificial insemination. My question for the guys is have you ever done this? What is the benefit to you? I get the product of your donation but you only get a little bit of money and maybe 18 years of wondering what your child looks like, I am doing the open donation which means the child is able to contact the donor when they turn 18 but only if the child wants to. The place I am doing this actually has staff impressions comments and one donor did state that he and his wife was able to produce a beautiful child and they felt it was important to let others experience that bond. This makes since to me, but not all of them have had previous children so what is their reasoning?
Also would it be harder for men to date women who has done the artificial insemination compared to someone who had children from a previous relationship?
As I would only want to father children that I raise, I would not have been an active or passive sperm donor. I also would not deal with a single woman who had a child via artificial insemination.
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Old 02-16-2014, 07:03 PM
 
Location: Center of the universe
24,645 posts, read 38,589,342 times
Reputation: 11780
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyYouNurse View Post
lol I have considered adoption, it cost more financially and there are higher risks of the parents coming back and claiming the child.

Someone did make the statement that what I am doing is someone of a planner looking at daycare's and such, maybe they are right. Since I have never been a parent I do not know exactly what I'm getting into, so I will probably wait a little longer.
Please wait a lot longer.
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Old 02-16-2014, 07:05 PM
 
Location: So Cal
52,011 posts, read 52,464,357 times
Reputation: 52530
Quote:
Originally Posted by HeyYouNurse View Post
lol I have considered adoption, it cost more financially and there are higher risks of the parents coming back and claiming the child.

Someone did make the statement that what I am doing is someone of a planner looking at daycare's and such, maybe they are right. Since I have never been a parent I do not know exactly what I'm getting into, so I will probably wait a little longer.
If you're worried about financial costs, you better buckle up cause kids cost a lot of dough.
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Old 02-16-2014, 07:13 PM
 
Location: Idaho
5 posts, read 4,636 times
Reputation: 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound View Post
If you're worried about financial costs, you better buckle up cause kids cost a lot of dough.
Having to put $10,000 up front to get onto an adoption list that cannot even guarantee how long it will be before you are picked, is a lot different than what financial cost kids come with. I am financially secure enough.
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