I'm sick of my divorce !!!!!

[cautiousmom]

Ok, I wanted to send some big smiley faces to you, but instead got the sticking the tongue out faces. Still new at this, will try again....

[kristenfromdenver]

See if you can get evidence that he is purposely dragging things out for attorneys fees. See if you can get a email or voicemail. But, or course, I'm not a laywer so I can't give legal advice.

[purplerosedar]

I just want to let you know i have been through just as much hell as you have plus more! My husband was physically and emotionally abusive to me and my 4 sons! I had to escape to get out. Once divorce proceedings had been started he stole my car stalked me at my new job(I had never worked in the 13 years we were married he would not allow it!) I had to take a leave of absence from work and go into hiding for a month and all most lost mt job! I had the children for the next 11 years he saw them every other w/e if the children wanted to go. He remarried right after divorce had 4 more children with her. My husband never stopped harassing me in all these years and 5 years ago because he is wealthy took me to court again and got custody of them I only get to see them every other Sat. from 10am-5pm he also does not let me have any ph contact. I have no more money to spend on a attorney so I just try and keep going! My kids are stuck in a home with 2 alcoholic parents while being emotionally abused! They have also been physically abused at times! They were very close to myside of the family also and they very rarely get to see them he also does not let me even see them on holidays!
All I can tell you is to hang in there and don't give up! I highly believe what comes around goes around!

[TCK]

Good Morning CMom.

Venting is good. All those stages we must go through are good. It helps us grow. Unfortunately he is doing what so many do and that is letting the attorneys get a good share of net worth.

I am in a going through a divorce support group (great group) and fortunately 3 out of 4 of us are doing the easy, uncontested thing in NM - i.e., take 5 forms to court house with spouse, show I.D., they stamp 4 out of 5 forms and send the other to judge who sees you agreed to this and that and signs off and we are divorced. Approximately $147.

Sorry you are going through this.....but it will pass. Stay strong!

[cautiousmom]

Kristen: I wish I could get an email or voice mail saying as much. He basically told me over the phone of his intentions during an hour tirade.

Purplerosedar: It's funny how you think that it's only you going through hell on earth until you start talking to others and hearing their stories and learn that there are others out there going through a similar thing or worse. It's too bad that when couples split there has to be so much acrimony. It's hard on everybody especially the children. Hang in there and I will do the same. We'll both live through it. I too believe that what goes around comes around. Can you get solid proof that your boys are being abused? If so maybe child protective services could help.

TCK: Thanks for your words of wisdom. I wish that we could resolve this thing in a civil and cheap manner. Unfortunately, there's a lot of money involved and he is out for vengence. Time will tell............

[Miborn]

Originally Posted by purplerosedar

I just want to let you know i have been through just as much hell as you have plus more! My husband was physically and emotionally abusive to me and my 4 sons! I had to escape to get out. Once divorce proceedings had been started he stole my car stalked me at my new job(I had never worked in the 13 years we were married he would not allow it!) I had to take a leave of absence from work and go into hiding for a month and all most lost mt job! I had the children for the next 11 years he saw them every other w/e if the children wanted to go. He remarried right after divorce had 4 more children with her. My husband never stopped harassing me in all these years and 5 years ago because he is wealthy took me to court again and got custody of them I only get to see them every other Sat. from 10am-5pm he also does not let me have any ph contact. I have no more money to spend on a attorney so I just try and keep going! My kids are stuck in a home with 2 alcoholic parents while being emotionally abused! They have also been physically abused at times! They were very close to myside of the family also and they very rarely get to see them he also does not let me even see them on holidays!
All I can tell you is to hang in there and don't give up! I highly believe what comes around goes around!

My Goodness that is terrible!
Can you take them to counseling to get a professional opinion. If you cannot afford one I do believe there are sliding scale and even free counselors. I would set it up and take them on the day you have them and tell them to keep it a secret because you are trying to get them back.
Maybe recording conversations with your ex would help also.

[Miborn]

Originally Posted by kristenfromdenver

See if you can get evidence that he is purposely dragging things out for attorneys fees. See if you can get a email or voice mail. But, or course, I'm not a lawyer so I can't give legal advice.

I totally agree.... Get clever and creative we are the smarter of the species. By any chance are you in Michigan? I have a friend that had her ex take her kids because he was financially better off than her and he did it without being married to anyone also,

[returningtonepa???]

just went thru much the same--he and his mother(also known as satan's illegitimate daughter) financially devestated me-----
my hope for my x is that he gets the pain he put me through back----too bad i won't get to see it!
was a great relief to be rid of him after 30 painful years though!

[Miborn]

The thing about Karma payback is that it can happen at any time. Meaning 30 yrs down the road or tomorrow.
I have always tried to treat others how I would like to be treated. so for that I have been walked upon more times than I can count.
But when it comes to my kids as I have gotten older I have realized that they are the only things that matter in this life your children are a part of your soul and existence. Everything that you strive for in this life is for your kids.
They carry on a part of you/us all good or bad. Our kids are our gene pool and traits.
You cannot give up on your kids.

[marshfield mom]

you deserve sooo much better....the reason he is giving you so much crap is probably being encouraged by her.