What does 'successful' mean? (wife, guy, husband, pickup)

[MarshallV84]

I think if you're basically content and happy with your lifestyle then you're successful.
If you're always complaining, lonely and fatigued you need to set goals and try to change things up!

[Skydive Outlaw]

Originally Posted by DennyCrane

So for the men, how do you interpret it when a woman says she's looking for someone successful? Do you think it's a just nice way of saying she's a goldigger? Or do you see it in a positive light? For the women, how do you decide whether a man is successful? Is there some formula or litmus test that you apply? Is being successful a yes/no quality or do you feel it's more fluid than that? And if so, how do you measure it?

When a woman is using the word 'successful' within the parameters of what could be a potential romantic relationship with a guy:

Successful is defined as -

For a woman to grant a guy an exclusive, although temporary monopoly on the use of her main orifice and/or all three. . . . .

The guy makes enough money to pay the mortgage (or own his house completely), pay the utilities on the house, cover the expenses related to any and all vacations that you take together, related nonsense thus ensuring that the woman that was looking for a guy that was 'successful' never has to invest or contribute in any way to the mirage/charade/façade known as the relationship, which would be nothing more than a parasite systematically feeding off her host aka 'successful guy'.

Note: not all women are like this - but about 1/3 are. Be advised - their parasitical nature and tactics increase in proportion to their level of attractiveness.

That allows her to keep any and all money she makes (if she is working) for herself while the 'successful' guy she is with takes care of her. After all - he should: he is successful and 'loves' her, whatever the hell that means.

The socio-economic paradigm that exists within this charade is just a morphed version of prostitution, although with slightly different terms of engagement and without the stigma attached to the woman involved.


Sky-O

[FBJ]

My definition of successful is not having to sleep outside, plenty of food in the fridge, and money in the bank

[UsAll]

A question to all the women reading and participating in this thread:


What about if you consider a man (for instance, one in his late 50s or even early 60s) whose career and work life, by-and-large, has been on the low-end of the earnings scale (whether employed by others or self-employed or some combination of the two) and yet who can now show himself to have, say, $250,000-to-$300,000 in monetary holdings . . . but not because he himself earned such monies through his own work earnings, investment strategies, or pursuits of whatever legit money-making opportunities and strategies BUT RATHER solely because his elder parent died and he came into his share of the inheritance of the family estate? So he has all that money to show for himself but he didn’t EARN the overwhelming bulk of it but rather inherited it.

The question is: Would you ladies deem such a man to be “successful” in your own eyes? After all, he is now not low-income (upon coming into said inheritance) and can wholly take care of himself (even if he chooses to, for the time-being, live rather economically and low-end just to preserve said funds at least until he can start collecting Social Security at age 62 or perhaps trying to wait to age 66 to start collecting)? And he is not collecting any public assistance and never has, is not dependent on any other person and not being or trying to be parasitic on anyone else (e.g., for instance, he is not looking for a woman to support him), is not living with and has not ever lived with his parents since his teens. And let’s say that, if you met him, you would judge him to be someone of good character and good heart; good personality; intelligent and well-spoken; having or exemplifying varied talents, skills, gifts; capable of being fun to be with; having a good sense of humor; and being physically/visually OK or presentable enough for you; and the like.

So would you women reading this thread deem such a described man to be “successful” and “desirable” if he was otherwise not ever or not quite financially comfortable or higher-earning but rather on the financial low-earning end (at least thus far in life-at-large) and therefore can only honestly point to having his $250,000.00 in assets simply by virtue of recently coming into an inheritance by virtue of his parent’s death?

In other words, does the determination of a man's “success” (financially-speaking) apply, in your mind, ONLY IF a man's financial assets were wholly or nearly-wholly self-earned or self-achieved through one’s own work efforts (not wholly or nearly wholly by virtue of coming into his parents' inheritance upon their death)? Please share your honest views.


Note that I have known some males (and females) in my life who present this type of life picture of themselves.

[relationshippro]

Being successful it's reaching what you want, whatever that makes you happy. so that depends on what you think being happy is (some people think having loads of money it's being "successful" just because they find the meaning of happiness and life in money, or other people could relate being successful with having a nice marriage and many kids) there could be millions of ways in which you could be successful, but the truth is, that you are the only one who knows when you are really being successful.

[BradPiff]

In the context of dating? Or just in life in general?

Because I know guys who are losers in life but highly successful at attracting women, and I also know men who are successful at life but get no where with Girls

[FBJ]

And if a woman does find this successful handsome man he won't be single anyway

[le roi]

Originally Posted by ohio_peasant

I'm liberally plucking sentence-fragments from longer statements, but the gist of the above quotes is that women are valuing behavior-traits and character-traits, rather than specific achievement (money, career, status).

that assumes that people are forthright and honest about what they're attracted to.


in this context, i place very little weight on what people say. observations of what people do is all that matters. that's one severe limitation of forums like these.

[DennyCrane]

Originally Posted by BradPiff

In the context of dating? Or just in life in general?

In the context of how it's used to describe a person's preferred partner. For example, if a woman says "I want to meet a guy who's smart, funny, attractive, successful, etc."

[krieger00]

Originally Posted by DennyCrane

In the context of how it's used to describe a person's preferred partner. For example, if a woman says "I want to meet a guy who's smart, funny, attractive, successful, etc."

I can tell you this working retail is not successful to me on top of that people do not view you as someone that is educated or smart.

Woman want a guy that is working towards something and not happy at a dead end job with no goals or dreams . I think a woman would get tired of never doing anything than sitting at home because your both broke .

Having worked and still working retail now going back to college for the 2nd time cant see myself following my dad shoes working two jobs for 20+ years to bring home the beacon. If i find a great woman i want to see my kids grow up and be in there life's a lot more.

I am working towards a career I am passionate about and can make a good living someday. It just suck that i am 30 and never had a long term GF before So what is a few more years ?

If a female cant see every thing i give up in order to make something of myself it is her lost.