Is this some form of jealousy? (wife, girls, attracted, attractive)

[Almeida93]

So there are two really close friends where i work part time. I like being friendly to people and making small chat when ever i am meeting someone new. So this two friends seem to be reallyclose but it is obvious that to me now that one dominates the other. Let's just called the one who dominates Betty and the submissive one Jane. So i first met Betty and starting having small conversations here and there just eally in a superficial level. I notice she feels attracted to me. I am just being nice to everyone at that place. Ok but the thing is i spend a little more time with Jane. Jane is your average shy gir,l really shy actually. I said to myself why not just try to hit it off with her instead of trying to go for the "hot" ones. But she is painfully shy. She liked to talk to me more by txt than face to face and it was obvious she felt attracted to me. So i said alright i invite her out. She said yeah but then i knew she was going to come up with an excuse to get not have to go out with me because of how shy she is. I ealize i have to take things slower and get to know her.

But here is the thing ever since i invited her Betty has built up this sort of tense wall whenever i try to get make small nice and be nice to her and she even has been defensive . Since they are eally close i notice Jane has been acted like that lately too which makes me believe Betty has been talking crap about me to Jane in order to block my relationship with her. She has even tried to humiliate my intelligence in front of her and others in kind of a tense passive agressive way and even has told me she doesn't understand what i just aid several times even though i am talking clearly and in front of them. i feel like she is trying to shame in front of her sort of like to show her "boys are stupid" dont go out with them sort of way.

i dont think i am overthinking. people are like that. i remember being tense and jealous in highschool when some girl liked my friend but i quickly let go and never did anything. us three are in our early 20s. i just think its messed up. i never did anything to them. there are both really quite. one more than the other of course. i dont think they would talk crap about me to others since they are really shy.. i think betty might be a little jealous of jane since you could say she is more attractive. whetever she sees me she puts up this face that you can tell she is on her "defensive mode". idk. i am not going to make advances with girls that have insecurities anymore.

[Almeida93]

btw i wrote this through my phone sorry for grammar mistakes.

[Almeida93]

maybe this is more common than i thought. i remember several times inn middle school and early highschool guys would try to tell me how some cute girls that liked me where not as attractive as they really were and try to nit pick stuff about her. ii never gave it much thought. no one is perfect. i just don't understand why people are like that. why would they try to not let a relationship florish. i think its a pretty inmature thing to do. they are shy so i think they are inmature as well. Bettyy for doing such thing and Jame for following her like a sheep.


have you gals or guys ever had this happens to you?

[NilaJones]

Here's what you gotta do: Ask Betty for her help in getting Jane to go out with you.

This way you are showing respect for Betty and her 'dominate' position, and showing respect for their friendship. You make it look less like you are going to take Jane away from her.

Of course, this will only work if you are serious about Jane, and see her as potential longterm/wife material. If you just want to get your d*** wet, then Betty is correctly picking up on that!