What is the point of playing it cool? (woman, attracted, call)
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It is all about power. Most relationships are not based upon love, mutual respect, etc. They are based upon power dynamics - if I like you more than you like me, then I lose. You win. So let me pretend I don't care.
Silly, yes. But this is what happens, at least on a subconscious level.
I went through both pages liking one post after another. I'd quote you guys, but I'd have to quote the whole thread. Thanks for the smiles and head nods on my end.
It is all about power. Most relationships are not based upon love, mutual respect, etc. They are based upon power dynamics - if I like you more than you like me, then I lose. You win. So let me pretend I don't care.
Silly, yes. But this is what happens, at least on a subconscious level.
Someone else commented to me that some people do this as a power trip and to get the upper hand in a relationship. I think power trips are futile and end in disaster for both parties. Both people wind up dissatisfied.
Someone else commented to me that some people do this as a power trip and to get the upper hand in a relationship. I think power trips are futile and end in disaster for both parties. Both people wind up dissatisfied.
Lay it out there.... if it was meant to be.. it will be...sounds sort of campy saying that... but life is short..... I ain't got time for games and other nonsense.......
Lay it out there.... if it was meant to be.. it will be...sounds sort of campy saying that... but life is short..... I ain't got time for games and other nonsense.......
I agree.
But, Chow, earlier in the thread, you admitted that you are sparing with your feelings.
Someone else commented to me that some people do this as a power trip and to get the upper hand in a relationship. I think power trips are futile and end in disaster for both parties. Both people wind up dissatisfied.
Not both. The person who has the upper hand isn't gonna suffer. They know they're in control and that their SO is more or less a puppet to be manipulated.
It's so ridiculous, pointless, and only ends up hurting people. If I like someone, then that's that. If they like me, then that's that.
I do not know if this is playing games but if i got a females number i would not call her for at least two to three days . I do not want to sound despite even if i kinda a like her I do not want her to know yet. Lets say he go out Wednesday and she wants to go out on Friday I might tell her I cant I have this going on when in reality I have nothing going on I just want her to think i have things going on even if i do not.
I do not want a woman to see me as safe and boring it not a good thing. Once get a real job i can tell her all about how rewarding it is and then find a hobby that has some danger involved like base jumping .
I hear people on here calling it playing games, so be it. In this world, it's either play the game or get played. I don't think that people should have to "play it cool" when it's already been established that two people like each other, but seeing the manipulative nature of both men and women, the shift of power usually goes to the person who cares less.
I wish the world functioned as easy as "happily ever after", but a lot of times it doesn't work like that. People are all different. Some people get a thrill out of hurting others, some people like to see how many people they can get to fall in love with them, and most importantly, people's feelings can always change. I can tell you several times I've been burned because a girl liked me, but the moment I started to show interest, they backed off and left me dumbfounded.
There's different defense mechanisms that both women and men use to protect themselves. For example, sometimes women will act mad or mean to keep a guy from approaching her. Playing it cool is a defense mechanism used by guys (and girls too) to help keep them interesting and keep from looking desperate.
"Playing it" cool is stupid, as is playing any sort of game when it comes to dating and relationships. Being cool, on the other hand, is attractive to some. Don't confuse the two.
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