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Well, first off, your reading comprehension is awful. I mean, heck, the very first line of my post that you quoted says, "There are those who don't want a LTR. As long as they communicate that to whomever they're dating, more power to them."
I mean, what is there in that sentence that is unclear to you? Holy cow. I start the post with a big, fat, hairy disclaimer that you ignore, and then you accuse me of glossing over those who are happily single? I'm thinking the only person doing the glossing over is you.
My point is actually a pretty simple one, and designed for those who actually do want an LTR. But since you seem to forget the opening sentence of a simple paragraph by the time you've reached the end, much the way a goldfish forgets what was on one side of its bowl by the time it reaches the other side, let me reduce it to bullet points:
• If you want a long-term relationship and are having trouble finding one by age 30, then rethink your approach.
• That means your interpersonal skills, how you dress, how you take care of yourself, and your circle of friends.
• If your circle of acquaintances is tapped out, then broaden your horizons.
• If you go on date after date and things never go anywhere, it's likely you
• A trusted friend can give you advice.
• Funny thing about advice. It's only effective if you actually follow it.
There. That's not so hard, now is it?
I know very well what you stated in your opening sentence, but your long rants seem to detract from it. Furthermore, your sharp focus on belittling those who want LTR's and can't find them have shifted the topic of the forum just so you can appear high and mighty by looking down at others. No one else here was really focused on people who were miserable and couldn't find LTR'S. This thread was pretty neutral with no bashing until you showed up.
I know very well what you stated in your opening sentence, but your long rants seem to detract from it. Furthermore, your sharp focus on belittling those who want LTR's and can't find them have shifted the topic of the forum just so you can appear high and mighty by looking down at others. No one else here was really focused on people who were miserable and couldn't find LTR'S. This thread was pretty neutral with no bashing until you showed up.
I'm not looking down on others -- except those who can't seem to comprehend a simple sentence. This board is filled to the rafters with people who want LTRs, but lack the self-awareness to understand what they're doing wrong. Do yourself a massive kindness and read the post after post that are variations on that same basic theme. What's more, there were several on this thread who indeed said that they wanted a relationship but were essentially too undesirable to have one before I chimed in.
In fact, let's look at some other comments that were posted:
"I think alot of those people are scared or too lazy to put in the work."
"Stuck in their ways"
"Standards are too high"
If the topic name were "People Who Don't Want An LTR" you might actually have a point. But, then again, I wouldn't have weighed in on that. But the word "Find" in the thread's title implies a search to begin with. Oh, right, I forgot that your reading skills aren't up to snuff.
I know very well what you stated in your opening sentence, but your long rants seem to detract from it. Furthermore, your sharp focus on belittling those who want LTR's and can't find them have shifted the topic of the forum just so you can appear high and mighty by looking down at others. No one else here was really focused on people who were miserable and couldn't find LTR'S. This thread was pretty neutral with no bashing until you showed up.
You were given good advice, and this ^^^^^^^ is what you did with it.
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I'm not looking down on others -- except those who can't seem to comprehend a simple sentence. This board is filled to the rafters with people who want LTRs, but lack the self-awareness to understand what they're doing wrong. Do yourself a massive kindness and read the post after post that are variations on that same basic theme. What's more, there were several on this thread who indeed said that they wanted a relationship but were essentially too undesirable to have one before I chimed in.
Really? I've only read one person on this thread that has essentially said this. I've heard more of, "It would be nice to have a relationship but I'm not desperate for one and if I'm single then it's not a big deal." Maybe to feed your own ego and your holier then thou, fire and brimstone attitude, you read that as people saying they are absolutely one hundred percent miserably single.
Quote:
If the topic name were "People Who Don't Want An LTR" you might actually have a point. But, then again, I wouldn't have weighed in on that. But the word "Find" in the thread's title implies a search to begin with. Oh, right, I forgot that your reading skills aren't up to snuff.
Apparently I'm not the only one then as many people responded with examples of both those who are actively looking and those who are not.
I'm not looking down on others -- except those who can't seem to comprehend a simple sentence. This board is filled to the rafters with people who want LTRs, but lack the self-awareness to understand what they're doing wrong. Do yourself a massive kindness and read the post after post that are variations on that same basic theme. What's more, there were several on this thread who indeed said that they wanted a relationship but were essentially too undesirable to have one before I chimed in.
In fact, let's look at some other comments that were posted:
"I think alot of those people are scared or too lazy to put in the work."
"Stuck in their ways"
"Standards are too high"
If the topic name were "People Who Don't Want An LTR" you might actually have a point. But, then again, I wouldn't have weighed in on that. But the word "Find" in the thread's title implies a search to begin with. Oh, right, I forgot that your reading skills aren't up to snuff.
Those are probably people who believe that everyone needs a relationship to be happy.
Dude, you can take our word for it, or not, but if someone doesn't want a relationship, very few people care. If you don't want a relationship, no one here is judging you negatively for that. I went through periods where I didn't want a LTR, heck most of youth was that way, I wanted to be unencumbered to do whatever I wanted to do.
If someone is intent on taking offense, they will, but I don't really see a point to that.
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Dude, you can take our word for it, or not, but if someone doesn't want a relationship, very few people care. If you don't want a relationship, no one here is judging you negatively for that. I went through periods where I didn't want a LTR, heck most of youth was that way, I wanted to be unencumbered to do whatever I wanted to do.
If someone is intent on taking offense, they will, but I don't really see a point to that.
That's good to know, I just don't see the point of unsolicited advice. I have not really seen most people here say that they know someone who is downright miserable being single. A few here or there but not really many to comment on. And it mostly seems like "I'm open to a relationship but not miserable without one." Such advice would be useful in a thread where the OP and most people are there complaining incessantly but this hasn't occurred here.
That's good to know, I just don't see the point of unsolicited advice. I have not really seen most people here say that they know someone who is downright miserable being single. A few here are there not really many to comment on. And it mostly seems like "I'm open to a relationship but not miserable without one." Such advice would be useful in a thread where the OP and most people are there complaining incessantly but this hasn't occurred here.
I don't think too many people really care one way or the other, in my experience, anyways.
I have a co-worker at work and I've know him from the 2 companies we have worked at together for about 15 yrs or so and as far as I know this guy has never had a GF.
He's a pretty closed off type of person, doesn't share much, but the point I'm making is that no one seems to even mention the fact that he's single for as long as he's been.
That's good to know, I just don't see the point of unsolicited advice. I have not really seen most people here say that they know someone who is downright miserable being single. A few here are there not really many to comment on. And it mostly seems like "I'm open to a relationship but not miserable without one." Such advice would be useful in a thread where the OP and most people are there complaining incessantly but this hasn't occurred here.
Just keep in mind this is a forum, by posting you ARE soliciting advice (this isn't a blog) and opinions. The TITLE of the thread says "Find."
If you're single and happy, more power to you!
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Moderator: Relationships Forum / Hawaii Forum / Dogs / Pets / Current Events
I don't think too many people really care one way or the other, in my experience, anyways.
I have a co-worker at work and I've know him from the 2 companies we have worked at together for about 15 yrs or so and as far as I know this guy has never had a GF.
He's a pretty closed off type of person, doesn't share much, but the point I'm making is that no one seems to even mention the fact that he's single for as long as he's been.
Well, I'd say people are being polite and minding their own business. Why should his relationship status be a topic of office discussion? I've never worked in an office where people discussed the personal affairs of co-workers. Offices aren't like the Mary Tyler Moore show, where everyone's chummy with each other and becomes like surrogate family members to each other. Thank heaven!
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