Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
I had one long term boyfriend say that he felt he could do better than me, but I'd be a fallback.
Another guy said he was not ready for a relationship.
Which one was easier to hear? I'll take white lies any day.
Real reasons I have dumped someone: they had obnoxious breath repeatedly, they wore hats on every date and then took it off and had 90's style hair plugs in one row, one i suspected was gay, one was basically a jerk.
Would that have been easier to take than... " I don't think we are right for each other."
I like to know the real reason, because once I know the reason I usually agree!
Even if it's something creeptastic like, 'I thought your ethnicity was something else, and now that I know what it is I don't like you'. Because a comment like that would make me immediately 100% uninterested in the person who said it. No broken heart .
Personally, I would rather be dumped honestly than fed lies. How about saying, "I'm just interested anymore," or, "I've met someone else." I'd have a lot more respect for someone who broke up with me that way than by telling lies.
Anyone agree?
I don't see what's wrong with "It's not working out". "We're not a good match". And so forth. Do people really say, "It's not you, it's me" ?
I don't see what's wrong with "It's not working out". "We're not a good match". And so forth. Do people really say, "It's not you, it's me" ?
This is what I would prefer. Nobody wants to hear that their squeaky voice is like nails on the chalkboard, or that they chew food like a cow. I can think of a million reasons not to date someone that would be heartbreaking if the other person knew. There's a reason why people use white lies, although saying you are not a good match with someone isn't really a lie. It's just not the whole truth.
Why does it matter? Because being honest with someone shows you have a measure of respect for them. Lying to someone shows you don't.
Not necessarily. Sometimes it's strictly for their sake. They may not feel anything toward you-respect or disrespect. They just have something to gain, and don't care how you take it. Ultimately it's selfishness for some people.
They lie to avoid drama, or to look good. But their motivation is strictly for themselves, rather than having low thoughts of someone else.
So, on occasion what someone does to others says nothing of their feelings. It just shows how far they're willing to go for themselves.
Unless they give you a totally outrageous lie that insults your intelligence, and they must think you're stupid to fall for it. So, they can think you're unintelligent--depending on the lie they give you. lol
Like a guy that told his wife he was late coming back from golf because his friend "wanted to pet a deer."
This is what I would prefer. Nobody wants to hear that their squeaky voice is like nails on the chalkboard, or that they chew food like a cow. I can think of a million reasons not to date someone that would be heartbreaking if the other person knew. There's a reason why people use white lies, although saying you are not a good match with someone isn't really a lie. It's just not the whole truth.
Usually, it's the whole truth. I guess I was assuming that by "dumped", some measure of a relationship was implied, not just 2 or 3 casual dates. If you have a date or two with someone and can't stand their voice, or the way they eat their peas, or some other mannerism, it's not really a "dump". You just don't call for another date. If they call you, you just say thank you, but you're not interested. That's not dumping someone.
"We're not a good match" usually involves something like finding out they're really spendy and you're not, or you have different goals or values in life, or something more substantive than an annoying habit that irritates you.
I don't see what's wrong with "It's not working out". "We're not a good match". And so forth. Do people really say, "It's not you, it's me" ?
I would say both "It's not working out" and "We're not a good match" are honest.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
.
