Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
So against my better judgement I took my gf to my parents dinner party. I though I could just keep her away from my parents by introducing her to my old friends. However, my mom was able to spot the one white person at the house and correctly deduced that she was my gf. My parents flipped out and now I'm no longer their son until I dump her and submit to an arranged marriage. For all intents and purposes I've been disowned because I have no intention of dumping her. I can live with it but my gf is pretty distraught over it and is asking me how she can get their approval. To make this night up to her I'm going to dedicate tomorrow to what she wants to do. But then what? I don't think she can let things go easily.
So against my better judgement I took my gf to my parents dinner party. I though I could just keep her away from my parents by introducing her to my old friends. However, my mom was able to spot the one white person at the house and correctly deduced that she was my gf. My parents flipped out and now I'm no longer their son until I dump her and submit to an arranged marriage. For all intents and purposes I've been disowned because I have no intention of dumping her. I can live with it but my gf is pretty distraught over it and is asking me how she can get their approval. To make this night up to her I'm going to dedicate tomorrow to what she wants to do. But then what? I don't think she can let things go easily.
I know this kind of thing happens in some cultures, but for the most part not so much to Americans.
Best I can say is, since you now live in America try to be more American in your attitudes and develop some self respect.
Of course this might mean walking away from their financial support in order to be independent of them but that's what most of us here would do.
I was born here. I am a self sufficient adult and my attitude IS American. Their finances mean nothing to me, all their assets are going to my brother when they die because he did everything right ( marry an Indian and pay them lip service) a sufficient portion of it also going to my sister's future dowry. As the 3rd of 4 kids I'm getting nothing.
I was born here. I am a self sufficient adult and my attitude IS American. Their finances mean nothing to me, all their assets are going to my brother when they die because he did everything right ( marry an Indian and pay them lip service) a sufficient portion of it also going to my sister's future dowry. As the 3rd of 4 kids I'm getting nothing.
Okay great. Then their "disowning" you means nothing essentially.
If they really reject you so completely that they never speak to you again that's their choice I suppose (personally I do not understand or respect parents like that), but with parents like that you'd be better off making a new family for yourself.
Isn't it possible they just overreacted and threw out the "disowning you" thing just to manipulate your emotions? Perhaps in time they'll come to their senses.
So against my better judgement I took my gf to my parents dinner party. I though I could just keep her away from my parents by introducing her to my old friends. However, my mom was able to spot the one white person at the house and correctly deduced that she was my gf. My parents flipped out and now I'm no longer their son until I dump her and submit to an arranged marriage. For all intents and purposes I've been disowned because I have no intention of dumping her. I can live with it but my gf is pretty distraught over it and is asking me how she can get their approval. To make this night up to her I'm going to dedicate tomorrow to what she wants to do. But then what? I don't think she can let things go easily.
Wow, what timing I'm sitting here watching, "Guess Whose Coming to Dinner." And reflecting on how some 30 years ago meeting my Jewish future in-laws and having my then fiancee meet my African American family... fortunately, our families had their heads screwed on well and while there were reservations there wasn't any drama.
I feel for you because this is a tough one.
I suppose it all depends on who you are actually most committed to, your girlfriend or your parents.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
