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After reading all these responses and after what I have experienced in this relationship with my current girlfriend, I now finally understand why people who don't have kids should only date people who don't have kids, and single parents should only date single parents.
After reading all these responses and after what I have experienced in this relationship with my current girlfriend, I now finally understand why people who don't have kids should only date people who don't have kids, and single parents should only date single parents.
That's the lesson you've taken from this thread? Not, "I shouldn't be in a dead-end relationship with this woman whose children are getting more attached to me each day, when I have no intentions of sticking around"?
THIS. Is exactly the reason I am extremely careful who I get romantically or emotionally involved with. I can't stand indecision and cowardice in a man or woman. Been involved with guys who knew our situation wasn't going to work, but they wanted me to stay anyway. What's that supposed to do? What can I do to "fix" things? And dealing with things insn't exactly fixing something that's broken or never worked, to begin with. I can only be "Mama" to my children. I expect my adult partner to understand right from wrong, wise from unwise and act accordingly.
Honestly, I just wanted advice on what I should do. I didn't want people to call me a coward or judge me. For God's sake, I am not even the father of any of her kids. 2 of the 3 fathers of the children are still alive but not even in the children's lives (one of the fathers was her ex-husband whom she divorced but later passed away). The real coward is the father who left her when she was pregnant with his child. The guy never came back to her, and he never saw his child, leaving the child fatherless. That guy is the real coward whether anyone on this forum admits it or not. But people on here are blasting me as if I am the devil, but I am just someone who is just dating a single mom of 4 kids. I was always honest with her when I said that I would never marry someone who has a large family of kids who are not mine. Obviously I am not a coward if I was the one who broke up with her in October, because I felt it was the right thing to do, so obviously I wasn't afraid to end a relationship. We got back together two months later, and believe it or not, she asked me twice if I wanted to come back, and I hesitated to even answer her because I knew why I broke up with her. If she didn't want me even after she knew where I stood on all this, I wouldn't still be with her after 7 months!
Honestly, I just wanted advice on what I should do. I didn't want people to call me a coward or judge me. For God's sake, I am not even the father of any of her kids. 2 of the 3 fathers of the children are still alive but not even in the children's lives (one of the fathers was her ex-husband whom she divorced but later passed away). The real coward is the father who left her when she was pregnant with his child. The guy never came back to her, and he never saw his child, leaving the child fatherless. That guy is the real coward whether anyone on this forum admits it or not. But people on here are blasting me as if I am the devil, but I am just someone who is just dating a single mom of 4 kids. I was always honest with her when I said that I would never marry someone who has a large family of kids who are not mine. Obviously I am not a coward if I was the one who broke up with her in October, because I felt it was the right thing to do, so obviously I wasn't afraid to end a relationship. We got back together two months later, and believe it or not, she asked me twice if I wanted to come back, and I hesitated to even answer her because I knew why I broke up with her. If she didn't want me even after she knew where I stood on all this, I wouldn't still be with her after 7 months!
We all told you!! END IT WITH HER!!
No one is forcing you to stay with her. This is what I meant about blame. You seem to be blaming her for staying with you even though she knows that you don't want to marry.
You are putting her in an unfair situation and she doesn't seem to have the self esteem to end it herself, which is a shame since it is her kids involved.
No one is forcing you to stay with her. This is what I meant about blame. You seem to be blaming her for staying with you even though she knows that you don't want to marry.
You are putting her in an unfair situation and she doesn't seem to have the self esteem to end it herself, which is a shame since it is her kids involved.
I'm not sure what other advice you want.
^^^This.
I think srjth was right that he's waiting for her to dump him. But really, the title of the thread should read "I'm still dating her although I made it clear that I won't marry her." And no one understands WHY the OP is still dating a woman he sees no future with.
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Not, "I shouldn't be in a dead-end relationship with this woman whose children are getting more attached to me each day, when I have no intentions of sticking around"? 
