Do men only make friends with women out of a desire for something more? (Christian, girlfriend)

[crbcrbrgv]

Originally Posted by SmerkyGrl

While it can be difficult, it is entirely possible and feasible to have a platonic relationship with the opposite sex.

It sure is. Remember Stanford and Carrie?

[ayersd1]

In all honesty, yes..

[karibear]

I've had male friends, and my husband had female friends. While we had a great deal in common, we also had other interests that we didn't share. I never worried about him running around on me, and vice versa.

Back in my much younger days, I also had male friends who were strictly platonic, and they gave every sign they preferred it that way, just as I did. I imagine there were probably a few who had ulterior motives, but they never let on, if so. There are things that make a person a good friend, but that doesn't necessarily mean they would make a good SO or mate, to say nothing of the fact that some of them were married - ane yes, the wives were aware of the friendship, and often became friends as well. On the other hand, there have been a few - very few - I'd put in the class of 'friends with benefits,' but the primary thing was always the friendship, and just having fun together. I was always happy for them when they found Ms Right, and from all indications, they reciprocated.

One of my favorites was a guy who really wanted to share our house - 3 females - because he had a gaggle of sisters back home and he missed having 'girl stuff' around. He said it didn't seem like a real shower if he didn't have to move someone's undies off the shower curtain rod first!

[Lindsey_Mcfarren]

Originally Posted by Anu2

I went out to dinner with a former co-worker of mine a week ago. He has been working in the U.S. for the past few months and is moving back to Europe in two weeks. Other than having drinks together a couple months back and exchanging some instant messages here and there, we really haven’t spent time together. Anyway, the other night we had dinner and when the bill came he took it and paid. I tried to pay but he said it was ok. So, I thanked him and we ended our night.

In my mind, that meant nothing other than he was just being nice. When I mentioned it to my male roommate, he said that the guy is just trying to get on my nice side so that when he wants to make a move, he can do so easily. Again, this guy is leaving for Europe in two weeks. Forever. I will likely see him one more time to say bye before he leaves. He has never shown any romantic interest in me whatsoever.

The only reason I bring this up is because every time a male friend does something nice, my roommate makes a comment about the guy wanting more than friendship. Is it true that a majority of men only befriend women and do nice things for them because they are hoping that one day it will progress beyond friendship?

In my experience this has not been true. However I can only speak for my own experience. I have had some friends for years, in fact since grade school and high school. I wouldn't say they are my best friends but friends none the less.

[Haaziq]

It's ironic how there's always the constant men are simple rants, but there are always questions being asked about us, lol. The answer is the same as most questions about gender. Varies by the man. There is no correct answer because any answer won't apply to them all. I will say though that I only talk to women who I have interest in. My friends are all male.

[Rance]

Is your rommate is jealous? Does he do things for you with the intention of getting a little something something? If not...why does he find it so hard to believe another male can be like that? Your rommate sounds like a dweeb.

[Stacy K]

okay I must say this not only man want women after breakup this relationship but many women want same thing from women. I have date with women she come back to surprise me with new toy and shave with insert cherry doche? to think I now come back to her with new clean look. I refuse this women because it do not fix inside only outside. But she get me drunk I do it anyway still have fun but regret munch.

[cpg35223]

You know, I have plenty of women friends. I work in a business that is 80% women. I go to lunch with them, send funny e-mails to them, have drinks with them, and travel with them.

Somehow or another, I've never made a pass at any of them. Sure, I freely admit that there have been any number of these women I have found attractive. What's more, there have been several who have made explicit passes at me, but I have nicely turned them down. I'm married, after all.

I think the problem is with your friend. He seems to have a very mercantilistic view of male/female relationships: I give you this, you give me that in return. It's a poisonous view of personal relationships and he should be dissuaded of it. For otherwise, he will hold all people in suspicion.

[Odie]

I am stumped on this one. Almost all of my male friends have at some point flirted with me in some form or fashion. I don't think anything of it, they're men and that's what they do .

[crystalblue]

I dont think thats the reason many of us make friends with women.

the problem is, not becoming attracted to them later.