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I can agree with your reply - not having had a physcial relationship would make such a thing easier, and it could be fun to go ahead and try anyway, but where is the common ground?
You go workout together?
You are both obssessed with fashion and gossiping about people?
You are both obssessed with soap operas and football/basketball/baseball?
Both being foodies might work.
Its not impossible, I dont guess. Just doesnt seem very likely. *shrugs*
Well...the common ground is something they would know best, and its not like they will see and talk to each other every day. It could be a friendship as simple as lunch and BS once a month. Still friends. Doesn't even mean you have to do much together at all to still be friends. Its a friendship. Not a relationship. There's no answering to each other as if your married or cohabitagi g. (Shrug) like you said..might at least be fun to try.
Is it possible for 2 long-term opposite sex friends to remain friends after dating each other and realizing that the relationship will not progress to anything serious?
Even if you weren't friends prior to dating, I think how you break up and how you communicate your friendship with one another sets the tone for a true healthy relationship with your ex in which you're able to express care and regard for them as a person.
I don't believe in closing doors on people we once cared for. Yes, friendship with the ex is possible. More probable and realistic when some time has passed by and they've moved onto finding other partners.
Keeping in touch to see if they're in good health/okay is cool. After all, we get old. Nice to know if they're okay! =)
It's easier to have a friendship if you have already had sex, for one, if the guys stays around, it's genuine, he has nothing to prove anymore. If you like him, it's because you like the real him. But this really depends on how strong the friendship already is. If you became really close while having the physical relationship, removing the physical, shouldn't take the friendship with it. This is if you have a good friendship, if you are just fun friends, and want to stop the sex, I'd say no chance. A great way to know, is if he was still around even if you didn't want to have sex....sickness...time of the month etc....if he disappeared, doubtful....Communication is key, you must let it all out into the open, if one has feelings, then chances are it won't work out....those feelings begin to overcome the person, as she watches her old lover, start to date new women, and vice versa.
As for the intimate involvement, yes it's tough to be friends after you have been involved physically, but I think it's much harder for a man and woman to be friends if they haven't. Unless they are gay, a male will always want to have sex with his female friend. I don't care what they say to you, but it's true. And women, no matter how much they say their guy friends are just friends, are fooling themselves. Women enjoy having a guy around, men make them feel good about themselves. A guy who wants to F them is going to be on his best behavior. Now find me a woman who can honestly say that their guy friend wouldn't want to have sex with them, if they allowed it, would be flat out lying, if she is between 16-60. If you have brainwashed yourself to where you really believe it, then go ahead, and test your convictions, I guarantee that he will jump on the opportunity. Why? Because that's what we hope when we have girl friends. That's why it's easier, to become friends after you have had the physical relationship.
I can speak very directly to this topic, as I experienced it firsthand, and in my case the answer was no.
The real deciding favor is: why did you break up in the first place? Was it mutual? And is any breakup really mutual?
In my case, I was friends with a guy for a while but he was dating another girl, we had a good rapport and chemistry, and finally we dated. Our relationship was tumultuous though because he was domineering and I right against that type of attitude. He didn't treat me well as we dated and finally dumped me for the woman who is now his wife. A few years later we got back in touch and agreed that we cared about each other too much to not be friends. Unfortunately, on my end I had never truly forgiven him for the poor treatment no matter how hard I tried. I always wanted some sort of vindication; some sign that I really wasn't as worthless as he made me feel. And that vindication never came, so it caused friction in our friendship until finally I told him I couldn't do it anymore.
This is just my experience. YMMV. However, I do believe that if there are any lingering feelings on the part of either person, a true friendship really isn't possible.
I dated a guy and I was not attracted to him, but I kept hoping I would be. After a few months, I had to call it what it was. We remained friends, and we still talk daily, 5 years later...
My husband always said, "I never had a female friend I wasnt interested in sexually." I cant say I really have either, at least not beyond grammar school age.
Life isnt necessarily an episode of Seinfeld. I mean what's the plan? Friends with benefits? Idk, that sounds meaninglessly complicated to me, lol.
Sure, you can remain friendly. Im not sure you can have a meaningful friendly relationship that has any real purpose. Where is the common ground?
Two women or two men can do a lot together that is superficial and would never include physical activity. Im not sure a man and a woman can really pull that off, at least not a mature man and woman.
I'm not one to say it can't happen, but I have more female acquaintances than ones I'd call true friends. I chat every now and then with a couple of ex's, but we aren't going out to lunch or anything like that. A Happy Birthday or Merry Christmas is about as far as it goes.
Of course. BUT, the success of it will probably depend mostly on the eventual partners you both end up with. You will need to befriend them and spend time with them and try not to have too much alone time with your ex in order to keep the peace within the new personal relationships. And once one of you is in a really serious relationship and especially when married, do not discuss 1) marital issues and 2) your past dating time (sex) with the friend. Just DON'T. Go. There. Period.
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