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My husband had an ex-girlfriend who was obsessed with him. He broke up with her in 2002 due to her obsessive needy behavior.
But... she would not let him go.
She found his land-line phone number on the internet and began leaving messages on his answering machine professing her undying love for him. This continued to happen while I was dating him. It got to the point that he had to tell her to stop leaving him those messages.
But... she would not honor his wishes. She continued to leave messages on his answering machine professing her undying love for him.
When he and I got engaged, he let her know about that. The only way he could let her know is when she called him. He would not call her. She would call him instead.
Her reply to our getting engaged? Even though she never met me, she told my fiance that I was not good enough for him and that he needs to divorce me.
We still got married.
But... she continued to leave messages on our answering machine professing her undying love for him. She also left a message stating that she did not like me even though she never met me.
At that time we had *and still have* caller id and call blocker. I also answered the phone when my husband was not at home. Some of the calls I answered came from her, but she never said anything when that happened. The reason why I knew was because she would call back from the same number the next day and leave a message on the answering machine. My husband had to block several phone numbers she used to call him and leave messages on our answering machine professing her undying love for him. I also left her private messages on her facebook page telling her to leave us alone... permanently... and to stop calling us.
She could not honor any boundaries my husband and I set up, and so the facebook private messages were necessary.
My husband also had a female friend who 1) could not honor any boundaries, 2) tried to break up our relationship while we were dating, 3) told my husband that I was not good enough for him when he told her that the two of us were engaged and 4) tried to break up our relationship when we were engaged.
My husband ended his friendship with her for several reasons.
I could not tolerate their behavior.
I do agree that you need help with your problems. You do have problems that need to be addressed and worked on.
Last edited by snugglegirl05; 06-27-2014 at 05:40 PM..
My husband had an ex-girlfriend who was obsessed with him. He broke up with her in 2002 due to her obsessive needy behavior.
But... she would not let him go.
She found his land-line phone number on the internet and began leaving messages on his answering machine professing her undying love for him. This continued to happen while I was dating him. It got to the point that he had to tell her to stop leaving him those messages.
But... she would not honor his wishes. She continued to leave messages on his answering machine professing her undying love for him.
When he and I got engaged, he let her know about that. The only way he could let her know is when she called him. He would not call her. She would call him instead.
Her reply to our getting engaged? Even though she never met me, she told my fiance that I was not good enough for him and that he needs to divorce me.
We still got married.
But... she continued to leave messages on our answering machine professing her undying love for him. She also left a message stating that she did not like me even though she never met me.
At that time we had *and still have* caller id and call blocker. I also answered the phone when my husband was not at home. Some of the calls I answered came from her, but she never said anything when that happened. The reason why I knew was because she would call back from the same number the next day and leave a message on the answering machine. My husband had to block several phone numbers she used to call him and leave messages on our answering machine professing her undying love for him. I also left her private messages on her facebook page telling her to leave us alone... permanently... and to stop calling us.
She could not honor any boundaries my husband and I set up, and so the facebook private messages were necessary.
My husband also had a female friend who 1) could not honor any boundaries, 2) tried to break up our relationship while we were dating, 3) told my husband that I was not good enough for him when he told her that the two of us were engaged and 4) tried to break up our relationship when we were engaged.
My husband ended his friendship with her for several reasons.
I could not tolerate their behavior.
I do agree that you need help with your problems. You do have problems that need to be addressed and worked on.
Do yourself and her a favor and never see her again.
Delete the recording.
Get rid of anything that reminds you of her (papers together, etc).
Go see a counselor. This is extremely not healthy.
I really don't want to see a counselor. The idea of talking to a counselor about it seems awkward and they may even think this problem is so petty and not worth their time. They might think what right I have to waste their time like that. They also might think I am just a weird person
I guess I have to hope it goes away
no way can I purposefully avoid her, the thought of never seeing her again kills me. Sure I could probably end the obsession, but never see her again? She is the one of the only girls I know that has actually socialized with me.
there is this tutor I worked with in my community college for my math class. My class ended but I attend a university now but she is there too. (which I already knew but I didn't know she was there when I was) She saw me one day and she came up and chatted with me. I still see her on campus sometimes and we chat. She is about 28 and I am 22. I realize I have a big crush on her and think about her a lot, but I have zero chance with her because she is engaged to be married already and she is older. But despite that I have developed some kind of obsession with her. I think about her all the time and the last time we spoke I secretly switched the recorder on my phone on and recorded the entire conversation, and I listen to it over and over
and the biggest thing, i keep thinking about the next time I see her, I am constantly planning everything about that next time, like exactly what to say or talk about. I have fake conversations with myself pretending it is her. I also feel really mad and jealous I can't get with her
the days I have seen her have been the main highlights for me for this entire year, every time between those days and even right now just feels like a build up to the next time I see her.
honestly, I can't stand that she is with another guy, whenever I see that ring on her finger I want to grab it and smash it to a million pieces. I also like to take a piece of paper and cut it up pretending it is her fiance, and I do imagine hurting him badly or even killing him, I know it is wrong but I can't help myself
is this a problem I should tell someone about, or will I get over it soon? This girl is also rather touchy feely, always patting me on the back or shoulder or side. I wonder why. also, she was my tutor but I still see her around and we chat. She was the one that initiated the first conversation when she saw me, I never initiate conversations with anyone let alone girls
you need to get over this obsession and now, all it will do is cause you stress, which you dont need at your age. in fact i highly recommend that you get professional help now because you are at the point of becoming dangerous.
I really don't want to see a counselor. The idea of talking to a counselor about it seems awkward and they may even think this problem is so petty and not worth their time. They might think what right I have to waste their time like that. They also might think I am just a weird person
As angry as you sound over this you may need to see one. Being a little jealous of the man is probably natural, but hatred for him is not a sound display of clear and logical thinking.
Quote:
Originally Posted by dashrendar4454
I guess I have to hope it goes away
no way can I purposefully avoid her, the thought of never seeing her again kills me. Sure I could probably end the obsession, but never see her again? She is the one of the only girls I know that has actually socialized with me.
It won't just go away on its own if you keep insisting on having contact with her. You need to back off. You are hurting yourself by cutting paper pretending it to be this woman's fiance and recording a conversation is just plain creepy. As far as socializing, she was your tutor and may be a nice person. Don't read too much into her patting you on the back or anything like that. Some women are just like that.
Presumably classes are out by now, unless you are enrolled in summer classes. Take the summer to focus your energies on something else. Walk away from this, OP. You're going to drive yourself crazy if you don't.
I really don't want to see a counselor. The idea of talking to a counselor about it seems awkward and they may even think this problem is so petty and not worth their time. They might think what right I have to waste their time like that. They also might think I am just a weird person
no way can I purposefully avoid her, the thought of never seeing her again kills me. Sure I could probably end the obsession, but never see her again? She is the one of the only girls I know that has actually socialized with me.
The whole point of these people's jobs is to talk about stuff like this.
You will not be wasting their time and you might learn a lot.
STOP seeing her. I mean it.
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and recording a conversation is just plain creepy. As far as socializing, she was your tutor and may be a nice person. Don't read too much into her patting you on the back or anything like that. Some women are just like that.