How do we judge each other by posts alone? (girl, couple, social)

[dreamofmonterey]

Originally Posted by ontheroad

This is my first question on our Relationships Forum. I thought I might get some good insight and feedback on "How we judge each other by posts alone?"

I've seen many friendships form, but on what basis?

I've read quite a few assumptions made about a poster with few clues as to its orgin.

I've read many accusations against posters, but by what criteria?

So, how do we form our opinions and make our judgments about each other?

Any thoughts? Feedback?

good question. May sound strange- but trust. When people arent writing about agenda issues (or how great their husband is) and it is something I can relate to- I usually think- this person is interesting, has alot of interesting ideas/opinions...in a sense, one can learn alot more about people by how they articulate themselves in their writing-

I trust my judgment here alot more than IRL sometimes, lol.

[ontheroad]

Thanks for your response, but may I go a step farther: How is the trust garnered?

Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey

good question. May sound strange- but trust. When people arent writing about agenda issues (or how great their husband is) and it is something I can relate to- I usually think- this person is interesting, has alot of interesting ideas/opinions...in a sense, one can learn alot more about people by how they articulate themselves in their writing-

I trust my judgment here alot more than IRL sometimes, lol.

[dreamofmonterey]

well- I have noticed that people- with an agenda- or who are witholding (or outright lying), dont write /express themselves- i.e. I trust more of my friends who email me frequently- than those who IM me -lol- IM is transient- writing is , to me more permanent-

[ontheroad]

Gotcha.

And happy holidays, dreamofmonterey!

Originally Posted by dreamofmonterey

well- I have noticed that people- with an agenda- or who are witholding (or outright lying), dont write /express themselves- i.e. I trust more of my friends who email me frequently- than those who IM me -lol- IM is transient- writing is , to me more permanent-

[dreamofmonterey]

Same to you! I have been off for a bit-lol.

[Tzaphkiel]

Originally Posted by Twinkle Toes

Yes, you need to be exorcised ... by the YAYA priest!!!!!

Hi Twinkle Toes, at the risk of sounding like a newbie which I am, what is a YAYA?!!

[GoddessofRandomThoughts]

Originally Posted by nicolepsy

i just wanted to add that there have been times when i have actually heard a poster's voice (it's not my voice at all) in my head whilst reading their specific post. it's the strangest thing! has this happened to anyone else? (or am i in need of an exorcism?)

OMG!! Thank Goodness! I thought it be just me

I think after a while those whose posts you read often have their own "voice" which is what makes it so surprising if they change up on you. Or say something that seems to be out of character.

[GoddessofRandomThoughts]

Originally Posted by cricket_factor

Amen! I posted an opinion on another thread a few days ago---and got my head bitten off in the process.

Yep, been there. I was shocked when that happened to me.

I had tried to be "diplomatic" about a subject and gently disagree, and a person that I had "talked" to before jumped all over me (very nasty and sarcastic).

It's amazing even though you don't really "know" the people here you start to think you do. I was actually hurt that this person would react in that way.

[Tzaphkiel]

Originally Posted by GoddessofRandomThoughts

Yep, been there. I was shocked when that happened to me.

I had tried to be "diplomatic" about a subject and gently disagree, and a person that I had "talked" to before jumped all over me (very nasty and sarcastic).

I was surpised and taken aback when I had this experience too, asking for clarification, which I had done in other threads with many people responding, including agree and disagree...but then in another thread very hostile response and attack. It was weird. The thread was closed and everything, many people hurling insults. I asked my grown son, who has much more experinece in things online, and he said "Basically don't take anything anyone says on line to heart. Ever. It's not worth it." Which helped my ruffled feelings.

[ontheroad]

It probably would be best if we all took your son's advice; sometimes I find it more difficult than others.

And, I hope everyone realizes that if you receive an unwarranted negative reputation point, feel free to call it to Markablue or Yac's attention and they will look into it.

Originally Posted by DiamondD