Husband sends wife spreadsheet of their sex life, she posts it online (name change, attractive)
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People were faulting him for sending it to her work email before a big business trip, telling her he won't miss her, and not picking up when she called to communicate.
The only details are the date, if there was sex, and what he sees are excuses. He didn't even detail what the yes response was. There's no details like
-how he asked for sex (was it crude, nagging, demanding)
- her yes response (was it engaged or worn down from the nagging)
- if she orgasmed/enjoyed the sex
If he was paying attention to the details he could have for a pattern in her no responses and her yes responses. I saw some like evenings, after the gym, when she isn't showered/clean, her period, and too tired (she does the cooking/cleaning/laundry).
It seems like he's only putting the details he wants (how much sex he gets). It also seems like portraying the details how he wants by labeling a column excuses which suggests to me he's not trying to understand but accuse/attack. Let's not bs as if he was going what women ask for and the poor man got berated for it.
He did that first when he sent it to her work email.
Details are details regardless ...you just mention yourself they are details.
Tech support and monitoring crew do not suffice as public especially held against exploiting the spreadsheet for all to see as she did.
You're stretching for technicalities, speaking of which, he technically would have intimate outings approximately forty times in a good year.
Possibly you and I view the situation differently. Which is fine, that's the beauty of the world.
I don't get migraines, but I have had the occasional bad headache. I take medicine and when it takes effect, I can rock 'n' roll.
As a guy who gets strong headaches and migraines, let me just say, they are not even in the same league (medicine or no medicine). While I agree with not letting minor things constantly stop you, I'd consider a migraine as a valid reason to hold off.
As a guy who gets strong headaches and migraines, let me just say, they are not even in the same league (medicine or no medicine). While I agree with not letting minor things constantly stop you, I'd consider a migraine as a valid reason to hold off.
My mom gets migraines, so I imagine that they are different. Of course, she gets a non-painful warning about a half hour before the headache sets in, so she can take her potent medicine at that time and avoid the pain.
Be that as it may, I would consider that a migraine would make you an "invalid" for a while. There's a huge difference between "no, I have a migraine" and "I'd really love to, except that I have a migraine... but as soon as I feel better, I'm going to rock your world!". One can say "no" to sex while still conveying the notion that he/she wishes it could be "yes". I think Spreadsheet Man was most angered by the fact that his wife's "no" responses didn't carry the slightest hint of desire that it be "yes" instead.
Details are details regardless ...you just mention yourself they are details.
You stated he is paying attention to the details...but he's not. He's paying attention to the details he wants.
To paraphrase your words it seems because the details he's not paying attention to don't cater your notion of poor men it's frowned upon.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPECFRCE
Tech support and monitoring crew do not suffice as public especially held against exploiting the spreadsheet for all to see as she did.
In many cases it's not just seen by tech and monitoring crews and there is a 'your content is mine to do with' clause for work emails.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPECFRCE
You're stretching for technicalities, speaking of which, he technically would have intimate outings approximately forty times in a good year.
I'm not stretching anything. You stated she was wrong for making this public overlooking that he did this first.
Quote:
Originally Posted by SPECFRCE
Possibly you and I view the situation differently. Which is fine, that's the beauty of the world.
It doesn't seem fine to you considering you were seemingly complaining how he's made to be the bad guy for documentation (which was false) and how he's paying attention to the details but "because the details do not cater women desires he's frowned upon."
It really doesn't seem fine to you considering your response to being told it's not he's not the bad guy for his documentation but how he released, that he's just as 'wrong' as her in regards to publicity, and that he's not paying to details because he missed quite a lot.
You seem quite affronted to the notion he's just as 'wrong' as she is and he's not the wrong party being berated because it doesn't cater women's desires.
My mom gets migraines, so I imagine that they are different. Of course, she gets a non-painful warning about a half hour before the headache sets in, so she can take her potent medicine at that time and avoid the pain.
Be that as it may, I would consider that a migraine would make you an "invalid" for a while. There's a huge difference between "no, I have a migraine" and "I'd really love to, except that I have a migraine... but as soon as I feel better, I'm going to rock your world!". One can say "no" to sex while still conveying the notion that he/she wishes it could be "yes". I think Spreadsheet Man was most angered by the fact that his wife's "no" responses didn't carry the slightest hint of desire that it be "yes" instead.
We don't know anything about Mr. Spreadsheet, so it might be that there was no desire for her answer to really be "yes". All we saw was his spreadsheet. There was nothing on his spreadsheet indicating his behavior at all. We can all assume that she was frigid and unreasonable, but we have no idea why she was making excuses and apparently he didn't either. This is where a conversation is really helpful.
As far as the migraine issue...post back when you've actually had one. If I'm trying to sleep one off and my husband came in asking for sex, he's getting "no", and maybe not even a word but a grunt, because that's about all I could muster up verbally. When any kind of stimulus (sound, light, smells..etc) makes you want to split your own head open with an ax, conveying that you wish you could have sex and would love to once your migraine is over is the FURTHEST from your mind. The moment someone opens the door to my darkened room, my only thought is go away please!
We don't really know enough to make a judgement. I am far more appalled by the wife posting it online than I am by him making the spreadsheet, even if that was pretty douchey itself.
5) He believes so strongly in his justification for being dissatisfied with his sex life that he would be so brazen as to create and fill a spreadsheet detailing everything he detailed, including whether or not the ex post facto observable evidence contraindicated his wife's excuses for denying him sex.
You're talking about a man in the prime of his life, not far removed from his super-horny teenage years, who is probably one of the 98% of men who had sex prior to marriage, and regardless of his premarital sexual history certainly figured when saying "I do" that he was legitimizing what should turn out to be a healthy sex life. You don't marry someone figuring that your days of having a health sex life will be over. With all of the propaganda out there from comedians and the like, telling men that their sex lives will become drab and boring in marriage, a man isn't going to sign that marriage license application for just any woman.
Man, when I was teaching in high school, I heard one of my teenage male students say "I thought people STOP having sex a lot when they get married!" Naive though that sounds, it accurately duplicates the opinions of many other people. Call it an offshoot of the Coolidge Effect if you want, but for lots of people, after that first year of marriage, the sex frequency drops steadily for the duration of the marriage. When I was going to get married, more than once someone suggested that I play the "M&M game", which was "put an M&M in a jug for every time you have sex in your first year of marriage, and then take one out for every time you have sex after that. I guarantee, in five years that jug still won't be empty".
Well, I'd have made fools out of those people for sure, but again it underscores the stereotype of the marital sex life... and stereotypes wouldn't exist if there wasn't a large amount of truth to them. My parents haven't even tried to have sex in nine years... and I think the last time they were successful was the last time their marriage was happy and relatively problem-free... which by now would be ~16 years ago. Yet they were having sex before getting married. You can see the downfall of the sex life.
Mr. Spreadsheet is justified in feeling angry about his wife's constant excuses. She's giving him sex 2-3 times a MONTH, when there's no good reason for her to be saying "no" so frequently?! You know how many months of that I would tolerate before getting divorced and finding someone who'd rock my body that many times in a DAY? I guarantee you, it can be counted on one hand with fingers left over. I wouldn't put up with that crap for long at all. We'd be fighting all the time and I would quickly lose patience.
June 3: "I'm watching the show" - why does that have to be a blanket rejection of sex? How about "I'm watching the show right now, but we can have sex when it's done." That would be a compromise which I'm sure the guy would accept.
June 4 (and others): "I need a shower" - okay, so take one! How long is a quickie shower? My wife is three times the size of an average woman and she can quickie-shower her entire body, washing her mid-back-length hair and all, in ten minutes. The weird thing is that my wife prefers sex BEFORE she showers, because, if we do happen to get sweaty, she can clean up afterwards and be totally clean as opposed to getting totally clean and then dealing with the inherent grossities of sex.
June 9: "I'm exhausted" - okay, why not "I'm exhausted right now but let's have sex first thing in the morning after we sleep"? Again, an acceptable compromise. I have to admit, as a guy, I NEVER like being turned down for sex, even if it's a legitimate reason. However, I'm reasonable enough not to hold it against my wife when she has a legitimate reason, especially if she does what she can to have sex with me as soon as that reason no longer applies.
June 11: "I'm still a bit tender from yesterday" - what kind of sex are they having that the woman is rubbed raw from one romp in one week?! Even at that, what's wrong with "I'm still a bit tender from yesterday but how about I give you a [something] job instead?" Then at least if the guy turns that down, he cannot say that his wife didn't do the best she could under the circumstances.
June 13: "I'm trying to watch the movie" (then fell asleep 15 minutes later) - Why did she not tell him, the next morning, "I'm sorry I fell asleep last night... I know you wanted to have sex. Well, do you want to have sex now?"
June 16: "Too drunk and ate too much" - conditions that resolve within a few hours maximum. Sleep it off or do it later in the day. My wife and I don't drink that much but we have eaten to the point of feeling really nasty... how else do we stay fat, you know?... so I understand this... but really, it doesn't mean anything more than "we should wait a few hours until we feel better". Had she rocked his world after her buzz and food baby disappeared, I doubt he'd have complained.
June 18: "I won't have time to shower and get ready for dinner" (and then they were 20 minutes early) - I would give this one to the woman, but for one glaring problem- they COULD have had sex AFTER dinner, and the evidence seems to show that they didn't. Maybe a good romp takes them more than 20 minutes. But... how about "I won't have time to shower and get ready for dinner if we have sex now, but let's not eat nor drink too much at dinner tonight and then we'll have sex right after we get home"? Again, the guy would have been fine with that, especially if they tend to have long sex sessions!
June 21: "I have to be up early"- Really?! You can't spare 10-15 minutes to have sex? What else were you doing that was so important in your life that you are going to be getting such a little amount of sleep prior to "having to be up early" that you cannot spare an additional 10-15 minutes to have a quickie? Man, COMPROMISE! "I have to be up early, so we can't make it a long session like we usually do... it'll have to be a quickie if you want it tonight." Problem averted, man satisfied, hopefully woman satisfied too, marriage upheld!
June 29: "You're too drunk"- what the heck?! What's so bad about having sex with your drunk husband? It's not like he's going to puke on you. If he's not so drunk that he's unable to perform, I guarantee he's not so drunk that he's unattractive to you. And if HIM being drunk is unattractive, what makes YOU think that it's okay for YOU to get drunk (June 16)?
July 5: "I might be getting sick"- Might be getting sick? Man, I might be getting hit by a bus tomorrow! I might be unable to sleep soundly tonight! I might get fired on Friday! Why deny sex for a condition that doesn't even exist at that time?! If you're sick, you will know you're sick! If you "might be getting sick", that means that you have some minor symptom that you don't usually experience, which you hope will go away quickly without blossoming into a major illness. Minor sore throat, clogged nostril, diarrhea, etc. How about "I might be getting sick, so if we have sex, you might be exposing yourself to what I have. It's up to you if you want to take that chance, and if you do, I'll have sex with you." My wife and I have each done this. Sometimes we just won't kiss during "sick sex". I can't recall an instance of us transmitting a disease to each other from having sex. When one of us is sick, since we're around each other all the time, if the other is going to get sick, it'll happen whether we have sex or not.
Many other days duplicated excuses from previous days.
And here's the kicker. I haven't been able to read the entire text of the wife's response but some of her excuses have been things like "I've been spending a lot of time cleaning"... notice how she didn't complain about her husband NOT helping with chores, so we can assume that she's satisfied with the amount of work he does around the house. I'm with a commenter on this thing, wherein he said words to the effect of "If you are spending so much time cleaning that it's screwing up your sex life, STOP FREAKING CLEANING. You're destroying your marriage!" Ain't that the truth. What good is it if you have a clean house if you have a ruined marriage?
If they started out doing it 3-5 times per week (which still amounts to a very lean time on the standard of MY marriage, but whatever), and then it drops to 3 times in 7 weeks, that amounts to sex being reduced to approximately 10% of its original frequency, in a very small number of years. That's awful.
Oh, here's another good one. She wrote, in her comments, "A few months ago I looked in the mirror and didn't like what I saw. I looked horrible naked and none of my clothes fit nicely, I had a muffin top. I've been trying to eat better and go to the gym ever since. "
It seems to me that Mr. Spreadsheet did not echo this sentiment. Not only did Mrs. Spreadsheet make no mention of her husband having made unflattering remarks (spoken or silent) about her appearance, but Mr. Spreadsheet wanted to make love to that body so much and so frequently, even in its "muffin-topped" state, that he would become so despondent over their lack of sex that he'd be driven to create this spreadsheet. Since she never said that he stood in the way of her going to the gym, it would seem as though he was okay with her plan to lose weight but he really didn't care one way or the other. He probably would have vastly preferred regular sex with his "fat" wife (and I use that term VERY loosely as a "muffin top" HARDLY qualifies) to infrequent sex with his "thinner" wife.
I also echo a commenter, that this guy did what he did to create a sense of "shock and awe". I know the feeling. When I was married to she who is now my ex, I did the exact same thing. She worked during the day and I taught music lessons at my studio (which was not in my house) in the later part of the day. I prepared my plan while she was working, and then executed it after my last lesson. I had loaded my truck with clothes and spare toiletries that she'd never notice were missing, and after my lessons, I drove 60 miles away, to a truck stop. I didn't tell her that I was leaving until I was already 15 miles away. I told her "I'm not coming home tonight, because I don't want to be around you. You need to learn your lesson once and for all that I'm not going to keep putting up with the crap you give me, like some doormat. All you need to know is this - I will be alone for the whole time that I'm gone, and I'm going far enough away that even if you try to find me, you won't be able to... so don't even try." That was the very first time I did such a thing, and it worked to a small extent at least.
I did that after a long time of putting up with the same crap on a regular basis, and trying my best to solve the problems in more pleasant ways. It was a "last resort" of sorts, for sure. Someone who would be meticulous enough to log his sex life in a spreadsheet for 1 1/2 months is not the type who would react capriciously and violently without lots of provocation. This is his way to score a powerful punch without punching - to show his wife the depth of the pain and frustration she has put him through without doing the exact same things to her, and such that she might take notice of what a problem she has created by being so sexually unreceptive.
I'm FIRMLY in the man's corner for this. It is totally unacceptable for someone who is healthy enough to be able to go to the gym, at age 26, to refuse sex that often.
Quote:
Originally Posted by *Sixy*
so it might be that there was no desire for her answer to really be "yes". All we saw was his spreadsheet. There was nothing on his spreadsheet indicating his behavior at all. We can all assume that she was frigid and unreasonable, but we have no idea why she was making excuses and apparently he didn't either. This is where a conversation is really helpful.
Not true. His spreadsheet indicates that he is patient, and a thinker, not given to violent outbursts or reactions. Many men of that age would react to being sexually denied by their women (girlfriends or wives) that frequently by finding some "side tail"... that is, if they choose not to start fiery arguments. I don't know one healthy married 26-year-old man who would be okay with getting sex three times in 7 weeks or so. There are going to be repercussions for that.
Quote:
Originally Posted by *Sixy*
As far as the migraine issue...post back when you've actually had one. If I'm trying to sleep one off and my husband came in asking for sex, he's getting "no", and maybe not even a word but a grunt, because that's about all I could muster up verbally. When any kind of stimulus (sound, light, smells..etc) makes you want to split your own head open with an ax, conveying that you wish you could have sex and would love to once your migraine is over is the FURTHEST from your mind. The moment someone opens the door to my darkened room, my only thought is go away please!
If your husband knows that you get migraines, and that you have a pattern of having sex with him as soon as you feel better, I guarantee he doesn't feel any ill will toward you for denying him in any way, even if it's just by a grunt, when you have a migraine.
5) He believes so strongly in his justification for being dissatisfied with his sex life that he would be so brazen as to create and fill a spreadsheet detailing everything he detailed, including whether or not the ex post facto observable evidence contraindicated his wife's excuses for denying him sex.
You're talking about a man in the prime of his life, not far removed from his super-horny teenage years, who is probably one of the 98% of men who had sex prior to marriage, and regardless of his premarital sexual history certainly figured when saying "I do" that he was legitimizing what should turn out to be a healthy sex life. You don't marry someone figuring that your days of having a health sex life will be over. With all of the propaganda out there from comedians and the like, telling men that their sex lives will become drab and boring in marriage, a man isn't going to sign that marriage license application for just any woman.
Man, when I was teaching in high school, I heard one of my teenage male students say "I thought people STOP having sex a lot when they get married!" Naive though that sounds, it accurately duplicates the opinions of many other people. Call it an offshoot of the Coolidge Effect if you want, but for lots of people, after that first year of marriage, the sex frequency drops steadily for the duration of the marriage. When I was going to get married, more than once someone suggested that I play the "M&M game", which was "put an M&M in a jug for every time you have sex in your first year of marriage, and then take one out for every time you have sex after that. I guarantee, in five years that jug still won't be empty".
Well, I'd have made fools out of those people for sure, but again it underscores the stereotype of the marital sex life... and stereotypes wouldn't exist if there wasn't a large amount of truth to them. My parents haven't even tried to have sex in nine years... and I think the last time they were successful was the last time their marriage was happy and relatively problem-free... which by now would be ~16 years ago. Yet they were having sex before getting married. You can see the downfall of the sex life.
Mr. Spreadsheet is justified in feeling angry about his wife's constant excuses. She's giving him sex 2-3 times a MONTH, when there's no good reason for her to be saying "no" so frequently?! You know how many months of that I would tolerate before getting divorced and finding someone who'd rock my body that many times in a DAY? I guarantee you, it can be counted on one hand with fingers left over. I wouldn't put up with that crap for long at all. We'd be fighting all the time and I would quickly lose patience.
June 3: "I'm watching the show" - why does that have to be a blanket rejection of sex? How about "I'm watching the show right now, but we can have sex when it's done." That would be a compromise which I'm sure the guy would accept.
June 4 (and others): "I need a shower" - okay, so take one! How long is a quickie shower? My wife is three times the size of an average woman and she can quickie-shower her entire body, washing her mid-back-length hair and all, in ten minutes. The weird thing is that my wife prefers sex BEFORE she showers, because, if we do happen to get sweaty, she can clean up afterwards and be totally clean as opposed to getting totally clean and then dealing with the inherent grossities of sex.
June 9: "I'm exhausted" - okay, why not "I'm exhausted right now but let's have sex first thing in the morning after we sleep"? Again, an acceptable compromise. I have to admit, as a guy, I NEVER like being turned down for sex, even if it's a legitimate reason. However, I'm reasonable enough not to hold it against my wife when she has a legitimate reason, especially if she does what she can to have sex with me as soon as that reason no longer applies.
June 11: "I'm still a bit tender from yesterday" - what kind of sex are they having that the woman is rubbed raw from one romp in one week?! Even at that, what's wrong with "I'm still a bit tender from yesterday but how about I give you a [something] job instead?" Then at least if the guy turns that down, he cannot say that his wife didn't do the best she could under the circumstances.
June 13: "I'm trying to watch the movie" (then fell asleep 15 minutes later) - Why did she not tell him, the next morning, "I'm sorry I fell asleep last night... I know you wanted to have sex. Well, do you want to have sex now?"
June 16: "Too drunk and ate too much" - conditions that resolve within a few hours maximum. Sleep it off or do it later in the day. My wife and I don't drink that much but we have eaten to the point of feeling really nasty... how else do we stay fat, you know?... so I understand this... but really, it doesn't mean anything more than "we should wait a few hours until we feel better". Had she rocked his world after her buzz and food baby disappeared, I doubt he'd have complained.
June 18: "I won't have time to shower and get ready for dinner" (and then they were 20 minutes early) - I would give this one to the woman, but for one glaring problem- they COULD have had sex AFTER dinner, and the evidence seems to show that they didn't. Maybe a good romp takes them more than 20 minutes. But... how about "I won't have time to shower and get ready for dinner if we have sex now, but let's not eat nor drink too much at dinner tonight and then we'll have sex right after we get home"? Again, the guy would have been fine with that, especially if they tend to have long sex sessions!
June 21: "I have to be up early"- Really?! You can't spare 10-15 minutes to have sex? What else were you doing that was so important in your life that you are going to be getting such a little amount of sleep prior to "having to be up early" that you cannot spare an additional 10-15 minutes to have a quickie? Man, COMPROMISE! "I have to be up early, so we can't make it a long session like we usually do... it'll have to be a quickie if you want it tonight." Problem averted, man satisfied, hopefully woman satisfied too, marriage upheld!
June 29: "You're too drunk"- what the heck?! What's so bad about having sex with your drunk husband? It's not like he's going to puke on you. If he's not so drunk that he's unable to perform, I guarantee he's not so drunk that he's unattractive to you. And if HIM being drunk is unattractive, what makes YOU think that it's okay for YOU to get drunk (June 16)?
July 5: "I might be getting sick"- Might be getting sick? Man, I might be getting hit by a bus tomorrow! I might be unable to sleep soundly tonight! I might get fired on Friday! Why deny sex for a condition that doesn't even exist at that time?! If you're sick, you will know you're sick! If you "might be getting sick", that means that you have some minor symptom that you don't usually experience, which you hope will go away quickly without blossoming into a major illness. Minor sore throat, clogged nostril, diarrhea, etc. How about "I might be getting sick, so if we have sex, you might be exposing yourself to what I have. It's up to you if you want to take that chance, and if you do, I'll have sex with you." My wife and I have each done this. Sometimes we just won't kiss during "sick sex". I can't recall an instance of us transmitting a disease to each other from having sex. When one of us is sick, since we're around each other all the time, if the other is going to get sick, it'll happen whether we have sex or not.
Many other days duplicated excuses from previous days.
And here's the kicker. I haven't been able to read the entire text of the wife's response but some of her excuses have been things like "I've been spending a lot of time cleaning"... notice how she didn't complain about her husband NOT helping with chores, so we can assume that she's satisfied with the amount of work he does around the house. I'm with a commenter on this thing, wherein he said words to the effect of "If you are spending so much time cleaning that it's screwing up your sex life, STOP FREAKING CLEANING. You're destroying your marriage!" Ain't that the truth. What good is it if you have a clean house if you have a ruined marriage?
If they started out doing it 3-5 times per week (which still amounts to a very lean time on the standard of MY marriage, but whatever), and then it drops to 3 times in 7 weeks, that amounts to sex being reduced to approximately 10% of its original frequency, in a very small number of years. That's awful.
Oh, here's another good one. She wrote, in her comments, "A few months ago I looked in the mirror and didn't like what I saw. I looked horrible naked and none of my clothes fit nicely, I had a muffin top. I've been trying to eat better and go to the gym ever since. "
It seems to me that Mr. Spreadsheet did not echo this sentiment. Not only did Mrs. Spreadsheet make no mention of her husband having made unflattering remarks (spoken or silent) about her appearance, but Mr. Spreadsheet wanted to make love to that body so much and so frequently, even in its "muffin-topped" state, that he would become so despondent over their lack of sex that he'd be driven to create this spreadsheet. Since she never said that he stood in the way of her going to the gym, it would seem as though he was okay with her plan to lose weight but he really didn't care one way or the other. He probably would have vastly preferred regular sex with his "fat" wife (and I use that term VERY loosely as a "muffin top" HARDLY qualifies) to infrequent sex with his "thinner" wife.
I also echo a commenter, that this guy did what he did to create a sense of "shock and awe". I know the feeling. When I was married to she who is now my ex, I did the exact same thing. She worked during the day and I taught music lessons at my studio (which was not in my house) in the later part of the day. I prepared my plan while she was working, and then executed it after my last lesson. I had loaded my truck with clothes and spare toiletries that she'd never notice were missing, and after my lessons, I drove 60 miles away, to a truck stop. I didn't tell her that I was leaving until I was already 15 miles away. I told her "I'm not coming home tonight, because I don't want to be around you. You need to learn your lesson once and for all that I'm not going to keep putting up with the crap you give me, like some doormat. All you need to know is this - I will be alone for the whole time that I'm gone, and I'm going far enough away that even if you try to find me, you won't be able to... so don't even try." That was the very first time I did such a thing, and it worked to a small extent at least.
I did that after a long time of putting up with the same crap on a regular basis, and trying my best to solve the problems in more pleasant ways. It was a "last resort" of sorts, for sure. Someone who would be meticulous enough to log his sex life in a spreadsheet for 1 1/2 months is not the type who would react capriciously and violently without lots of provocation. This is his way to score a powerful punch without punching - to show his wife the depth of the pain and frustration she has put him through without doing the exact same things to her, and such that she might take notice of what a problem she has created by being so sexually unreceptive.
I'm FIRMLY in the man's corner for this. It is totally unacceptable for someone who is healthy enough to be able to go to the gym, at age 26, to refuse sex that often.
Not true. His spreadsheet indicates that he is patient, and a thinker, not given to violent outbursts or reactions. Many men of that age would react to being sexually denied by their women (girlfriends or wives) that frequently by finding some "side tail"... that is, if they choose not to start fiery arguments. I don't know one healthy married 26-year-old man who would be okay with getting sex three times in 7 weeks or so. There are going to be repercussions for that.
If your husband knows that you get migraines, and that you have a pattern of having sex with him as soon as you feel better, I guarantee he doesn't feel any ill will toward you for denying him in any way, even if it's just by a grunt, when you have a migraine.
Yep pretty much
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