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I am assuming you meet online. That probably means Y'all did the usual first date banter on the phone or by email.
I tell people this all the time, meeting someone you've been talking to online is not a usual first date. You know this person. You've been talking to them and reading about them. Where as a first date is usually someone you meet casually and are just now getting to know each other. For instance, you meet a girl at work and talk to her pertaining work. You don't know her high school, her life, who she is really, there is a lot of mystery. Not so online.
All that said, no, you probably shouldn't drone on and on about your ex during any date, let alone the first.
That would have been nice b/c I could have just hung up on her or stopped talking to her online. LOL.
We met from a mutual gym class. Awkward. Now I have to find a new class time or schedule b/c I'm sure she will be there. ugh
I just think that when people meet to go on a first date show up with a pleasant personality and good manners. This means do not mindlessly Drabble all night about the ex ! If your date is ex bashing you just want to say see ya and end the date.
The only time I think it's ok to mention the ex if its just telling the other person facts like I was married for five years had one child been divorced two years etc. but even still then be very brief. Since they have a child and are in contact, I may ask, at this point if they're on amicable term with each other. This is where people really need to listen.
So it depends on the context of how the ex is brought up - if the person is being mature and giving you the facts (why they still maintain contact) then that is different and the person on the date should listen. However, the mindless ex bashing never bring this up on a date, really rude and inconsiderate. I think if ex bashing happens, polietly excuse yourself and leave.
I decided to go out on a date tonight. I usually just keep things strictly casual, however; I met someone that seemed nice and decided to go out for drinks only instead. She was very nice and well spoken, and we got along quite well. I swear I could talk to her for 4hrs+ I'm pretty chatty myself, so when I meet someone who is equally chatty it can go on for a long time which it did.
During the conversation she kept mentioning her "ex" how bad he was, etc, etc,.....
I get it, we've all had bad "ex's" myself included. The thing is at most I mention it once in passing, but for the most part I never mention ex's. This was the first time we met too, not 2nd, 3rd, etc..........
While I have had bad "ex's", not every woman is like my ex and I don't treat them like my ex. In fact, the ex is in the past so I don't even think about it anymore. This is the 3rd girl I've met that has done this. In fact, I think at the end I knew more about her ex than her.
I don't know why this happens, but it definitely isn't attractive. I ended things politely tonight and that's it. I don't really feel like talking to her again. Maybe I should ask her for her ex's number instead and take him out.
Has anyone else had this happen repeatedly ?
It is unfortunate that this girl didn't quite work out, maybe in a few months you could try again with her?
She might be in a better emotional position by then so you can see if you really do enjoy her and want to continue to get to know her better.
That would have been nice b/c I could have just hung up on her or stopped talking to her online. LOL.
We met from a mutual gym class. Awkward. Now I have to find a new class time or schedule b/c I'm sure she will be there. ugh
Maybe awkward for her, not you. Just go to your gym class at your regular schedule, if you see her just smile and say Hi. Then continue with your class, no big deal
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