Quote:
Originally Posted by 4DM1N
Sometimes I think we get really caught up on the idea of having other people like us. So we go a great distance out of our way to try and live up to another person's expectation of what we think they want to see from us. I've made myself feel so put down and left out so many times by the idea of not being accepted by somebody else. But at the same time, I was compromising on who I am. That's not fair to either me or the person I'm with at the moment.
The fact of the matter is that you should continue being yourself. Don't try to fit somebody else's mold by acting how you think you should act for them to like you. Keep being who you are and the end result should be that you'll attract somebody who likes you for you.
Now keep in mind, this doesn't mean that you should maintain bad habits. There may be actual things that you're doing that's hurting your chances at finding the one. And if you can get feedback, that is great. After a date that doesn't work out, feel free to ask the other person if there was anything you did that was off putting or a turn off. If they're a decent person, they should provide some quality feedback.
I hope somebody can take away something from my mistakes. Good luck out there! It's tough but ultimately worth it if you find the right fit.
|
By definition, what you describe is
authenticity.
For any relationship to be happy and abundant both people need to be who they are, respect their own needs/wants as autonomous and content human beings.
Picture a ven diagram. Both circles join somewhere in the middle. Both circles remain autonomous and "whole" while sharing some important similar qualities that overlap. Not quite mathematics, but you get the point which I think most people tend to forget since they conform to what society or social pressure wants them to be but they are not.
Happy healthy relationships depend on how authentic both people are with themselves and others. Yup!