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No I agree with you, if a woman doesn't like the guy who's interested in her, then she will say she has no offers.
But there are maybe a small handful of women who are unfortunately not attractive to the majority of men. They never get asked on dates and spend a lot of lonely nights alone. They probably never get a first date if they do OLD and send out their pic after a message.
I've known a few visually unappealing women who have been single for a long time. They might have been single all their life. There are some cases where a woman does not have much to work with and are most likely doomed to stay single.
I'm a man but I do see the pitfalls of being a physically unattractive woman.
Yeah maybe. Personally, I've never met one. Most physically unattractive women that I've met are already married or don't talk about their dating situation.
The ones that I've met that complain about this are usually above average in looks.
If the only way I can feel good about myself is to compare myself to homeless or disabled people then I don't want too.
Understand that in the 3rd world, there are many people in utter poverty who have high ambitions and the drive to succeed, which just cant be attained because of so many barriers to cross.
A teacher once gave me this priceless piece of advice on how to go about life in general, which I feel will be of great value to you: "When you are having a tough time, back off. Think, what went wrong. Analyze, what the issue is. Finally, Research on what should be done to get there."
Understand that in the 3rd world, there are many people in utter poverty who have high ambitions and the drive to succeed, which just cant be attained because of so many barriers to cross.
Here you are, with a wonderful machine called the computer which you can use to expand your knowledge on just about any subject. Schedule a video chat with a well reputed psychologist and get tips on how you can make it out of problematic situations. Good professionals are there, ready to help people. Just do some research and find them. Don't spread your rage on forums. That will never work and just aggravates the situation more.
I love it when somebody on here doesn't like what you say they chalk it up as anger.
It would be nice if people gave chances to people they are not attracted to but lets be real personality only comes into play after someone likes your looks. Anything else is settling.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stinkerr
So I need to work on my social skills because I don't agree with you lol?
rubbish, you do need to work on your social skills. if you cant approach women, and get them to go out with you, YOU are the on doing something wrong here. i keep saying, its not the approach itself, its how you approach is the key. and its what happens right after the initial approach that women decide whether or not to date you, or even sleep with you.
if you are respectful with your approach, and treat the women like someone you would really like to get to know, you are going to have more success with women than you realize. do it right and you can have women eating out of your hands, and you have to beat them off with a stick.
do it wrong however, and the women will in fact leave you to your own devices.
rubbish, you do need to work on your social skills. if you cant approach women, and get them to go out with you, YOU are the on doing something wrong here. i keep saying, its not the approach itself, its how you approach is the key. and its what happens right after the initial approach that women decide whether or not to date you, or even sleep with you.
if you are respectful with your approach, and treat the women like someone you would really like to get to know, you are going to have more success with women than you realize. do it right and you can have women eating out of your hands, and you have to beat them off with a stick.
do it wrong however, and the women will in fact leave you to your own devices.
I don't see the problem my devices have treated me better than any women has even my mother I appreciate the compliment though.
Forget about your friends and all of those other things. Get out, get involved in things and make a nice life for yourself. When you have your **** together and have something interesting to talk about things will happen much easier. Being overweight definitely doesn't help. Deal with that first.
Oh and by the way, do you live in a tent or something?
LOL, the word "pup tent" came to my mind. From reading OP's remaining posts I know he lives in a "cottage", sounds like a "guest house". A bit more interesting than a basement so a few "cool points" for that.
OP, how can a guy with such a cool forum name be in this position? "RockSteadyVibe" Yeah, baby, yeah!!! (in my best Austin Power voice)
I know it sounds trite but "no one will love you until you love yourself".......or some such cutsie blah, blah. Modify that to read "no one's going to think they'll have fun with you until you seem to have fun yourself". No one wants to hang out with a "Donald Downer", am I right?
I read your posts but only skimmed the others.............my thoughts in no particular order:
You have a full time job. Good. Are you smart with money management? If you're saving for a house you probably are. And you're living in a van down by the river.....oops, wrong thread. I mean you live in a cottage in your parents backyard. Could be a cool bachelor's pad, right? So I'm thinking money is no problem.
I think you should work out and work out HARD and steady. And watch your diet. Start not just "counting calories" but count more. When I do it I count calories, calories from fat, protein, carbs, fat, fiber, and sodium, plus calculate meal to meal the running percentages of protein, carbs, and fats to make sure I'm hitting my daily percentage goals. Set reasonable but challenging workout and weight goals, achieve them then set some more. Do a variety of exercises and activities to prevent boredom and getting into a rut (and easily coming up with excuses to skip today's workout). Sign up at a gym or fitness center? I guess but I never have. I do all my workouts at home with my own equipment and I "hit the streets" for powerwalks (with a weighted vest, currently 36 lbs), interval training, and biking. Grab a MP3 player or smart phone and load them up with not only favorite tunes but some good, pounding music so you can "Rock Steady" (see what I did there?)
Expand your interests and activities around your health and fitness. Spend time outside and not cloistered at home. Do fun active things where you'll be sure to run into people, especially women who will share similar interests.
Work on your conversational skills. Shoot the _hit with guys, moms with babies, elderly folks, anyone. And don't view women as "romantic objects" - that's too much pressure for you. Treat them as they are..............as people, with common everyday concerns and interests regardless of gender. For example, in a grocery store there are thousands and thousands of things to talk about to folks, including women. They're called "products on the shelf". Just don't replay the Animal House scene in the produce section (key word: cucumbers )
Why buy a house? Too easy to isolate yourself at your age. If you want to buy, go condo I guess. How about rent an apartment? (yeah, yeah no equity) Who knows how interesting (and interested in you) your neighbors could be. "Party at RockSteady's tonight!"
I agree with others that you should get your family and friends to try to set you up on some dates. Don't worry about rejection! It's better to try and risk rejection then not try at all............and wonder the rest of your life how it would have turned out if you had just taken a chance. I have a personal list of "My Top 10 Regrets" and about 5 of them deal with not "kissing the girl" in various situations when I was in my teens. The other ones deal with taking a swing at various bosses and supervisors. I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
One thing that helped me break out of my shell years and years ago was I just got sick and tired and pissed off (at myself) at being bummed out all the time and missing out on some fun, any fun. Don't lash out at people and be an a-hole, I mean internalize it and use it to focus on what you want................to be happy, right?
That's enough for now, RockSteady (man, that is a cool name.)
You're closer than you think, man.
Cheers.
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(in my best Austin Power voice)
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