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I know. I realize what you're saying but I'm not like you. You prolly have people that love you and if you lost one and dumped them it wouldnt be a big deal because you have a bunch but somebody like me doesn't. I have my family my boyfriend and I cant afford to dump someone just because they are not perfect. Plus I love him and care about him.
Like if I did that w/ everyone there would be nobody left practically.
Being with someone because you're needy isn't a good reason for putting up with emotional abuse and someone who doesn't care about your needs. Someone who's "mean" to you (as you put it) when you express your needs.
I know. I realize what you're saying but I'm not like you. You prolly have people that love you and if you lost one and dumped them it wouldnt be a big deal because you have a bunch but somebody like me doesn't. I have my family my boyfriend and I cant afford to dump someone just because they are not perfect. Plus I love him and care about him.
Like if I did that w/ everyone there would be nobody left practically.
And I know you think that being alone would be worse than being mistreated, but it's not true. It would be painful, but it would be temporary.
I feel bad for you. You don't seem to be able to think of bigger possibilities for your life. Why not dream a little? Learn as much as you can about the world beyond what you know. Find a way to meet people who are different from the ones you know.
IMAGINE being in a relationship with a man who does hug you and kiss you and hold your hand and give you that affection you crave. Start with that.
I know. I realize what you're saying but I'm not like you. You prolly have people that love you and if you lost one and dumped them it wouldnt be a big deal because you have a bunch but somebody like me doesn't. I have my family my boyfriend and I cant afford to dump someone just because they are not perfect. Plus I love him and care about him.
Like if I did that w/ everyone there would be nobody left practically.
Nobody is perfect. But you need to jettison what weighs you down, upsadaisy. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes it leaves you on your own. But keeping it around is poison to you. People, users like this, will drain you, and before you know it, you won't be you anymore.
I did that. I'm alone. But I'm nobodies door mat anymore, either.
I agree with the others here that have suggested a counselor. I am sure you can find free counseling in your area. The counseling is not to make you break up with your boyfriend, just someone to talk to.
Another suggestion I would make is pretend your good friend that you really care about and love just told you about her relationship with her boyfriend, and told you exactly the same things you have posted here. Ask yourself what your suggestion to her would be. Would you suggest she stay with a guy that treats her like that?
I agree with the others here that have suggested a counselor. I am sure you can find free counseling in your area. The counseling is not to make you break up with your boyfriend, just someone to talk to.
upsadaisy.....isn't there anyone at your church you can talk to about this?
How old were you when this relationship began? Do you live with him, or do you keep your own place? If you work at McDonald's, it sounds like you don't have a college education. Are you interested in that? Would your bf be ok with that? (Community college is affordable, and adaptable to part-time or full-time work) Or would he "want you at home" for some reason that you haven't explained yet? Someone who's for real into you would support your interest in improving yourself. If not--danger sign.
I got with him when I was 18. I moved in two years ago. We got a house then my mom moved close. The house is in his name but I pay a little of the bills here then I have to pay for stuff at my mom's trailer and other stuff. I finished high school and I have been working at MD's for five years. I got the job when i was a senior in hs. I actually like it. It's not a bad job at all and I'm always pretty busy. College isn't really for me. The nearest one (I think) is an hours drive anyway. My boyfriend takes the car to work. I only go to the city for concerts or specialty shopping trips. It's pretty rare I go because of the gas money and there is little reason to. He went to college (UNC Chapel hill). And I have things I do around here like clean the house, check on my mom and siblings, get meal prepared, wash clothes, etc. Just not time for extra stuff esp since I work.
I know. I realize what you're saying but I'm not like you. You prolly have people that love you and if you lost one and dumped them it wouldnt be a big deal because you have a bunch but somebody like me doesn't. I have my family my boyfriend and I cant afford to dump someone just because they are not perfect. Plus I love him and care about him.
Like if I did that w/ everyone there would be nobody left practically.
Right here is your answer. You will stay with someone who treats you poorly and neglects your needs because to you it's better than being alone. You wrote here hoping people would tell you that it's possible for you to change him, but sadly for you, that's not going to happen.
Im saving up for us to get married but it wont be for a looong time because of the expenses. I'm getting extra hours at work but not enough to fund a wedding. it's been slow to get off the ground plus the main shopping places are in the city so it's hard to plan.
Im saving up for us to get married but it wont be for a looong time because of the expenses. I'm getting extra hours at work but not enough to fund a wedding. it's been slow to get off the ground plus the main shopping places are in the city so it's hard to plan.
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