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I need advice. I have been in a relationship for several months with "Josh." In my opinion Josh has a problem - he is obsessed with his cat "Scooter."
We usually hang out at his place on the weekends (we work in different towns). On the weekends he does the following:
- Constantly calls the cat pet names - "Big boy!" "My buddy!" "My little man!"
- Includes the cat in our conversations, all the time - "Isn't that right, Scooter?" "Isn't that cool Scooter?" "Scooter, should we order pizza tonight?"
- If the cat meows during the night he jumps up to make sure his "baby" is ok and invents problems the cat has during the night. - "He didn't like how his food was laid out."
- I think he gives more affection to the cat than he does to me sometimes.
- He allows the cat to eat directly from his plate during meals and, worst of all, shares drinks with the cat and drinks after the cat (and then expects to kiss me.)
When we are apart during the week and talk on the phone:
- He includes Scooter in our phone conversations by asking him questions
- He puts Scooter up to the phone and tells him to talk to me
- Often needs to get off the phone to tend to the cat's needs
I have asked Josh to stop some of this behavior, particularly including the cat in our conversations and eating and drinking with the cat. He has failed to take me seriously and continues his behavior.
Besides all this, Josh is a sweet, smart, caring normal guy. And he clearly loves animals which is a great quality. I love them too and have a cat and dog of my own. But I don't know if I can put up with the cat obsession much longer. Or am I wrong and this is normal?
Should I continue trying to talk to him or just end the relationship? If his relationship with Scooter in this manner makes him happy perhaps I should just walk away.
Aaww... your BF really loves his kitty.. I don't think there's anything wrong with talking to your pet like they were your own.. they're literally family.
I'll tell you this...I have a cat and I don't usually admit it. I mean, a man with a cat gets judged. Even in my last relationship, I did not talk to my cat when she was around, not at all! He's breaking man law by doing this. I love animals, but a man with a cat is a tough thing to overcome with women, speaking as a man with a really cool cat.
Since when? I had a rescued cat when I was single and no lady ever sneered. Had them same cat when I met my wife. Cat has since died and we've rescued another. Still nobody ever called me a sissy. Well, at least not for owning a cat.
I'll tell you this...I have a cat and I don't usually admit it. I mean, a man with a cat gets judged. Even in my last relationship, I did not talk to my cat when she was around, not at all! He's breaking man law by doing this. I love animals, but a man with a cat is a tough thing to overcome with women, speaking as a man with a really cool cat.
I like my cat better than I like most people. Ive always been a cat person, had them since I was young. What you say is kind of true, but I have never paid any attention to it. I think a man having a cat is less judged today than it was years ago. My dads generation men almost universally hated cats (at least publically) My generation was not much better, but I guess I bucked the trend. Young men have cats and seem to not have a hang up about it. Times have changed regarding men with cats. Ive never understood why cats were more connected with the feminine. After all they are the best hunters God ever made. Watch a cat hunt, watch its abilities and tell me they are for sissies. They are the special forces of the predator world. That being said my cat is NOT, he is fat lazy and spoiled. The only thing he stalks is a scratch behind the ear and a cat treat, Whos fault is that??? well its mine. Being a cat person myself I can say the OP had better get used to it or let the guy go. People who like animals like that (dog or cat) don't change, in fact as they get older usually animals become more important to them. When I was dating my wife she knew I was a cat person, so she knew what she was getting into. She is also an animal person, so no conflict. She likes dogs, and we have had those as well. I think its been proven that pet ownership reduces stress and lengthens your life.
I like my cat better than I like most people. Ive always been a cat person, had them since I was young. What you say is kind of true, but I have never paid any attention to it. I think a man having a cat is less judged today than it was years ago. My dads generation men almost universally hated cats (at least publically) My generation was not much better, but I guess I bucked the trend. Young men have cats and seem to not have a hang up about it. Times have changed regarding men with cats. Ive never understood why cats were more connected with the feminine. After all they are the best hunters God ever made. Watch a cat hunt, watch its abilities and tell me they are for sissies. They are the special forces of the predator world. That being said my cat is NOT, he is fat lazy and spoiled. The only thing he stalks is a scratch behind the ear and a cat treat, Whos fault is that??? well its mine. Being a cat person myself I can say the OP had better get used to it or let the guy go. People who like animals like that (dog or cat) don't change, in fact as they get older usually animals become more important to them. When I was dating my wife she knew I was a cat person, so she knew what she was getting into. She is also an animal person, so no conflict. She likes dogs, and we have had those as well. I think its been proven that pet ownership reduces stress and lengthens your life.
Well well and well...... I don't think any thing else you can do, other than finding another man who has no cat. Seems he is a pet lover like all of other woman and men who has pets. Sorry for that saying but he is not going to choose you over his cat, that is it, I am not going to choose some one I date over my 4 cats. No way.
lol! Great to see you, truff. Occasionally someone actually does welcome a new member. Oh well.
I think what the guy needs is an extreme pet person for a gf. The OP isn't that person. Moving on. It would be a great premiss for a Seinfeld episode, though. Tailor-made for Seinfeld.
oh my my..... you made my day lol
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