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I disagree with this statement. Sometimes they are doing themselves a huge favor by not putting themselves out there. See, unlike a job (which is required to live and you just deal with the rejection that comes with job hunting), a relationship is not essential to life. So when you continuously put yourself out there and you're continuously rejected, you start to see some benefits of not putting yourself out there. For one, you can focus on things that will actually add to your life. I've decided to allocate the time once used for trying to date to spend at the gym or out riding the bicycle. I've also contemplated a career change, which will require some studying and certification attainment. These are things that will help me in life. What does getting shot down time and time again by women do for me? Can someone explain this to me?
I've withdrawn myself from the dating market recently, and I feel very good about it. The vast majority of women clearly want nothing to do with me as far as a long term relationship goes (trust me, I've tried and tried and tried). So I've decided that it doesn't make much sense for me to keep partaking in the activity that makes me feel like crap at the end of the day.
Jobs are easier to maintain than a relationship in my opinion. I've been working for almost 7 months now and getting this job was easier than keeping a woman in my life. There is job based confidence (which I have) and girl based confidence. They're different.
Actually, I'm trying to get you to see a shrink, because I really think you need one. If you were that happy with your choice, you would not be on here complaining so much. You'd be out there living your life.
Yep. Of course, you are free to remain saturated in self-sabotaging negativity and celibate misery for the rest of your life, too. Have at it. I don't think anyone is really going to notice or care except your family. Harsh truth, but truth. It's no skin off any woman's back if you don't date.
It's easy...you have to show some degree of "interest" if you want my feelings to show.
Even today 21st century in American culture, we men need to initiate things, there are a few women who make the approach but mostly women (specially the one who get hit on often) don't call or give any signs the guy can approach them.
We need to find out from a third party, if she's available and even with dating you can never tell.
And yes, we protect our feelings, not cowardice, but mostly because if your feelings are shown you are more vulnerable.
Yep. Of course, you are free to remain saturated in self-sabotaging negativity and celibate misery for the rest of your life, too. Have at it. I don't think anyone is really going to notice or care except your family. Harsh truth, but truth. It's no skin off any woman's back if you don't date.
Another issue is that people assume that how you are online is how you are in person. The snarky "maybe it's your attitude" responses tend to sum this mentality up quite well. However, I'm willing to bet that many of the incessant complainers on this forum are probably fairly normal IRL.
I'm not. Negativity, misogyny, and gynophobia like the kind on this board just oozes out the pores. Believe me, we women can smell a man with an axe to grind a mile away.
I mean, you don't know anything about those people that you meet IRL for a split second. They may very well have their own issues that they haven't revealed to you in the ten seconds they stopped to speak to you about the weather.
I don't know what my reputation is here on this forum after only being here a short few weeks. What I do know is that IRL I tend not to bog down my friends with the issues in my life. I open up a little here and there, mostly to show what's going on in my life, but I don't say much about these things.
Another issue is that people assume that how you are online is how you are in person. The snarky "maybe it's your attitude" responses tend to sum this mentality up quite well. However, I'm willing to bet that many of the incessant complainers on this forum are probably fairly normal IRL. Not all, but many. I'm very sociable and amicable. That's why it annoys me to no end when people make the worst possible assumptions about what I'm like IRL and how that's possibly impacting my dating life. That's why I have no qualms with saying this: I'm awesome in real life. My friends love me, my family loves me, my co-workers like me. I'm successful. I'm intelligent. I'm charismatic. Just because I come online to vent every once in awhile or seek out advice doesn't mean I'm on the verge of a breakdown or need professional counselling. It just means that I'm having an issue in a particular aspect of my life that I need to get off my chest or that I need to seek some advice on. I imagine some of these "wonderful" people you meet in real life might be the same type of people you see here venting or seeking advice every once in awhile.
Lafleur, chill out. I really didn't have anyone in particular in mind when I typed my comment.
And if it's any consolation to you, lots of us have less than perfect romantic lives. Ya want me to tell you MY problems? No, didn't think so.
I'm willing to bet that I'm significantly older than you and have suffered more disappointment in love than you. But I don't feel any anger. Frustration? I can understand that, yes. Hurt? Sure. Apprehension or doubt? Absolutely. But, no, not anger. I'm old enough to have learned that anger only ends us hurting me (I don't know if YOU are angry at women, but there are other guys on here who clearly are).
I mean, you don't know anything about those people that you meet IRL for a split second. They may very well have their own issues that they haven't revealed to you in the ten seconds they stopped to speak to you about the weather.
I don't know what my reputation is here on this forum after only being here a short few weeks. What I do know is that IRL I tend not to bog down my friends with the issues in my life. I open up a little here and there, mostly to show what's going on in my life, but I don't say much about these things.
Another issue is that people assume that how you are online is how you are in person. The snarky "maybe it's your attitude" responses tend to sum this mentality up quite well. However, I'm willing to bet that many of the incessant complainers on this forum are probably fairly normal IRL. Not all, but many. I'm very sociable and amicable. That's why it annoys me to no end when people make the worst possible assumptions about what I'm like IRL and how that's possibly impacting my dating life. That's why I have no qualms with saying this: I'm awesome in real life. My friends love me, my family loves me, my co-workers like me. I'm successful. I'm intelligent. I'm charismatic. Just because I come online to vent every once in awhile or seek out advice doesn't mean I'm on the verge of a breakdown or need professional counselling. It just means that I'm having an issue in a particular aspect of my life that I need to get off my chest or that I need to seek some advice on. I imagine some of these "wonderful" people you meet in real life might be the same type of people you see here venting or seeking advice every once in awhile.
That's how I am. The women on this site rubs me the wrong way. They say they want to help but all they do is put down men who don't say what they want to hear. Just like you, my friends like me, my co-workers like me, and my family loves me. If women don't like me, I won't lose any sleep over it. I'm doing just find without them.
I'm not. Negativity, misogyny, and gynophobia like the kind on this board just oozes out the pores. Believe me, we women can smell a man with an axe to grind a mile away.
Sometimes it works the other way around: a barracuda, a vixen, a golddigger, the ice cold queen, the clingy, the motherly, the damsel in distress...and there are also the "disco jolly" and the just plain "crazy",
Believe me, we women can smell a man with an axe to grind a mile away.
Some people are certainly more obvious about it. I think I'm very good at concealing the issues in my life. Just the other day I was conversing with a close buddy and let on that I was feeling kind of down lately because of not being able to establish a relationship. He said he was totally surprised by my comments and thought everything was going well in my life.
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