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I was friends with a guy since May, he was totally into me, but I was not that attracted.. Started officially dating him in August and knew right after one week he is not THE ONE. Cuz he suffocated me with his clinginess and neediness.
I have found somebody else 4 weeks ago. It just started so I wouldn't talk about the big love yet.
Not sure why this is a red flag.
I am a foreigner, excuse me if I am not expressing myself correctly. I am trying my best.
You are the common denominator here. Are you difficult?
Just how many guys with 5+ years in LTRs have you encountered to be able to say that? If they were so much better, then why aren't you married already? These are rhetorical questions...
Because if it's any more than two then hoists and petards.
I kept running into the same problems cuz I dated and married emotional unavailable guys. None of them had a real and longterm relationship before and had no clue how to live with somebody, how to manage friends/partner, adjust to living with somebody, how to work on a relationship and keep sexual interest over a long period of time.
I am now trying to find (or just found, but it is very fresh) a guy who has been married or dated somebody for many years and has realized and learned from his experience and tries to avoid making the same mistakes.
Somebody who had some longterm relationships has a complete different view as somebody who has a new partner every few years IMO.
I kept running into the same problems cuz I dated and married emotional unavailable guys. None of them had a real and longterm relationship before and had no clue how to live with somebody, how to manage friends/partner, adjust to living with somebody, how to work on a relationship and keep sexual interest over a long period of time.
I am now trying to find (or just found, but it is very fresh) a guy who has been married or dated somebody for many years and has realized and learned from his experience and tries to avoid making the same mistakes.
Somebody who had some longterm relationships has a complete different view as somebody who has a new partner every few years IMO.
Can't agree as the vast majority of 5-10 year relationships (marriage or no) I see should have ended after 2-3 years.
Marriage, to me, is a once in a life time prospect. You have ONE chance to get it right. It's not something to do flippantly.
I've dated people that I wanted to marry. They didn't want to marry at all, or not marry me. Do I have a commitment issue because of that? Ridiculous.
I've been on the other side too, and just because I didn't agree to marry someone I could "stand" but wasn't widely in love with and passionate about spending my entire life with, then I have a commitment issue? Also ridiculous.
If you are 40+ and haven't found a person yet that can stand being with you for more than for 2-3 years, there is something wrong. Sorry. That's my opinion.
Your problem with men is rooted in your judgmental behavior. If I ever met a woman like you I would turn and walk away from her and never look back. Judgmental people are devoutly to be ignored. BTW this is coming from a 45 year old man who has never been in a relationship and is perfectly 100% normal.
Your problem with men is rooted in your judgmental behavior. If I ever met a woman like you I would turn and walk away from her and never look back. Judgmental people are devoutly to be ignored. BTW this is coming from a 45 year old man who has never been in a relationship and is perfectly 100% normal.
LOL
Thanks for posting in the relationship forum with all your experience.
Preferring a divorced person over a still single person is like preferring Blaine Gabbert (failed terrible QB, started for over 2 years) over Johnny Manziel (hasn't started a game yet, clean slate).
Or in the case of the Chicago Bears, preferring Jay Cutler over just about any other NFL quarterback. Couldn't get it done in Denver, and can't in Chicago. Sorry, couldn't resist.
Its just something that never happened. I have had several women friends but nothing more. So its not like i avoided women or anything like that. I don't blame women or anything else. Its just an it is what it is kinda thing. Would I have liked to? Yeah, but it just wasn't in the cards.
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