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Location: Living near our Nation's Capitol since 2010
2,218 posts, read 3,452,784 times
Reputation: 6035
I would never marry anyone who I thought was a lot less smart than me. That isn't being pompous, that is being realistic. Smart men turn me on, average or below do not attract me. Fortunately, my current BF is extremely smart....and cute too.
This is a silly question. 50% of the people in the US do.. In one relationship, one person always has a higher IQ.
Quote:
Originally Posted by oh-eve
You just ruined all the fun, smart a$$
Not really, IQ isn't a good measure of intelligence. I have known a lot of folks with high IQ's that are dumb as **** because they never used their natural given ability to learn anything worthwhile. I have known folks with low IQ's who worked hard and learned a great deal of things.
Do you think it's possible to be in a relationship with someone who isn't in par with you intellectually? Someone you couldn't have a profound intellectual conversation with? They are not book smart, they are not voracious bookworms. But they have a high level of common sense and they are emotionally/street smart. Would you be in a relationship with them/marry them?
I know I can. I'm use to most people not being interested in profound topics I like. That's what online is for. Hell, I would marry a air head if her personality is on point. I'm in no position to be picky.
Do you think it's possible to be in a relationship with someone who isn't in par with you intellectually? Someone you couldn't have a profound intellectual conversation with? They are not book smart, they are not voracious bookworms. But they have a high level of common sense and they are emotionally/street smart. Would you be in a relationship with them/marry them?
How would you even measure this parity (or lack thereof)? With that said, I have had some of the most profound intellectual conversations with individuals on both ends of the intelligence spectrum. Many times, being 'smart' had nothing to do with being able to develop profound observations. They were, as best as I could tell, very perceptive and open and very willing to discuss the issues and provide unusual perspectives.
I did and thankfully she doesn't want to listen to my intellectual babble. She is far more socially intelligent than i am and i have learned a great deal from her to my eternal benefit.
Very true. For me, intelligence is absolutely essential in a man. An active mind, a desire to know about the world and other people and to continue to learn. A man who's open-minded, astute, and as Jrz said, has practical skills and common sense.
But, unlike when I was in my 20s, it is no longer essential that a man has a university education. It's not important at all, actually.
University educated has never been a thing for me. They have to be those I bolded though.. open minded, willing to learn, common sense..... able to have a conversation.... these things are required.
Depends on how you define smart. I have an Ivy League degree, an IQ that is well above average and a wide range of intellectual pursuits. But I think there are many types of intelligence. Emotional intelligence is something I had to work very hard on.
Frankly, I don't necessarily want someone with the same type of intelligence as I have. It can be exhausting. And it can also be isolating - when you're paired up with another smartypants, you may begin to feel like you're part of your own little club and see yourselves as being apart from others. Not something I've experienced personally, but something I've seen happen. I'm wary of any relationship that promotes an "us against the world" attitude.
I prefer to date guys who are strong on practical skills and common sense, because it balances my own qualities. Doesn't mean no intellectual conversations are taking place - you just gotta open your mind to what constitues "intellectual." I've never dated a dummy - they've always been highly intelligent guys, if not geniuses. They just aren't necessarily reading Schopenhauer in their free time or subscribing to The New York Review of Books.
great post!!
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