Sometimes it's unavoidable being seen as a sex object to Men. Am I right? (marry, calling)

[Adi from the Brunswicks]

Originally Posted by CSD610

How does someone carry themselves as "loose"?

If you want to see one small representation of how women treat men as sex objects, go to youtube and watch the video by Trace Adkins called "Ladies Love Country Boys" and "Swing".

It really isn't a good idea to watch television either, it is nothing but trash that is not even close to representing real life. Just a bunch of fantasy drama nonsense.

Yup. You shouldn't believe much of whats seen on drama.

[MMorena]

Originally Posted by Adi from the Brunswicks

It looks like you trying to probe into the psychological and biological aspects of a man. Its best you ask this question in a psychology (or) life sciences forum. They might be able to give you a better answer as to why men react this way.

Honestly, to my eyes some people look good no matter what they wear. So your perception isn't entirely true.

Exactly, so it comes back to what women are being taught these days. This is perhaps where the differences in what women are being taught about dating and what men think about lies. Being that I am in my 20s, conversations with women (older and young) will often say the same thing "be mindful of how you dress, be mindful of how you carry yourself," read any thinkprogress or Upworthy article on women issues and the main subject line is going to be about women being judged for their appearance.

So whether this is indeed a true reality that men have, is debatable; but what's becoming more apparent is that women are being told something differently here; and that's that "men judge women based on appearance."

Originally Posted by Magnatomicflux

The highlighted is just part of being professional. So no, you are not able to dress as you please at work.

Yes, but it still goes to serve my point that people formulate opinions upon their physical appearance. Let's not pretend this isn't a fact of life.

Originally Posted by CSD610

How does someone carry themselves as "loose"?

If you want to see one small representation of how women treat men as sex objects, go to youtube and watch the video by Trace Adkins called "Ladies Love Country Boys" and "Swing".

It really isn't a good idea to watch television either, it is nothing but trash that is not even close to representing real life. Just a bunch of fantasy drama nonsense.

Who said women don't treat men as sex objects??? There are a lot of examples of it; women just have the greater freedom to get away with it. But this isn't about creating an equitable vision of how both men and women both use each other as sex objects. The question is how do men choose who is a suitable partner and who is suitable for only a good time?

Whether men on here want to agree or not is on them, but there are men out there that do still access the type of woman a lady can be, based upon her appearance. Just the other day, I overheard two of my coworkers talk about how the girls in sorority A were the "marriage type," the girls in sorority B were the "bros type" and the girls in sorority C were the "f*** type." So it happens. And this type of common occurrence is why women are constantly being told by their mothers, girlfriends, and women centered articles that their appearance influences perception. It's another reason why feminists are so riled up against "**** shaming." Now of course television can never be an adequate representation of the human psyche, but it's a good mirror and in the case of the tv show, the theory that men judge women based upon the appearance is completely challenged.

When I saw the episode it sparked a realization in my mind, that I had actually met guys who would approach me and other girlfriends for only sex--even though we thought our appearance didn't warrant such an approach--so it got me wondering if what we have been told about our appearance and males was true? I even asked the guy if I came off as someone interested in a casual hookup? He said no, and so I asked him well why even bother trying?" Clearly, in this moment appearance didn't matter.

[Adi from the Brunswicks]

Originally Posted by MMorena

Whether men on here want to agree or not is on them, but there are men out there that do still access the type of woman a lady can be, based upon her appearance. Just the other day, I overheard two of my coworkers talk about how the girls in sorority A were the "marriage type," the girls in sorority B were the "bros type" and the girls in sorority C were the "f*** type." So it happens. And this type of common occurrence is why women are constantly being told by their mothers, girlfriends, and women centered articles that their appearance influences perception. It's another reason why feminists are so riled up against "**** shaming." Now of course television can never be an adequate representation of the human psyche, but it's good mirror and in the case of the tv show, the theory that men judge women based upon the appearance is completely challenged.

I have heard this from men too. My first thought is "what a douche", and this is coming from a guy. Appearance plays a role for men too, in that you need to look presentable for the scenario. I expect the same from women. Why let others generalize how men will look at you. We are a unique bunch, all from different backgrounds and experiences.

[MMorena]

Originally Posted by Adi from the Brunswicks

I have heard this from men too. My first thought is "what a douche", and this is coming from a guy.

Appearance plays a role for men too, in that you need to look presentable for the scenario. I expect the same from women. Be yourself, and don't go over the top.

So question, in the scenario I shared. Why do you think a guy would approach a girl for a causal fling, when her appearance and behavior at least suggests she'd be interested in something more than sex?

[Magnatomicflux]

Originally Posted by MMorena

So question, in the scenario I shared. Why do you think a guy would approach a girl for a causal fling, when her appearance and behavior at least suggests she'd be interested in something more than sex?

Shot in the dark.

Nothing more, nothing less. Same reason women do it.

[Mikala43]

Originally Posted by MMorena

The point is that women are told quite often that our way of dress dictates men's perception of us? Have you heard of "**** shaming?" It's the one of the main subjects of conversation in Feminism these days. Now I am inclined to agree that women to some degree, are judged for their appearance. I mean women are even told to be conscious of how they dress in the workplace, but if no one really cares how a woman dresses, and her appearance really has no value on who she is, then shouldn't women be able to dress however they please in the workplace?
[/i]

EVERYONE is judged on how they dress/present themselves. When you meet people you form an instant opinion subconsciously. We choose the image we want to present. If I went to a corporate job interview, unkept and wearing the cocktail dress and shoes from the night before...... they are not going to hire me no matter how good my resume is. Why? I don't look like the kind of person they want to work with. Is that fair? Well, it is the way it is.

Most people do not want to get into an long conversation to see what type of person you are. Who has the time to do that with each person we meet? So you go on first impressions.

I don't believe people should get a first impression and decide as fact what type of person they are, but you do it as a guideline. Sure the biker guy might be super sweet and volunteer at the SPCA, but it would not be the "type" of person I would want for a relationship.

If your running around showing as much of your body as possible, then people are going to assume you want attention to your body. You are the one highlighting it.

Corporations have dress codes for both genders, because they are establishing the type of company they want to project.

This is not rocket science.

[Adi from the Brunswicks]

Originally Posted by MMorena

So question, in the scenario I shared. Why do you think a guy would approach a girl for a causal fling, when her appearance and behavior at least suggests she'd be interested in something more than sex?

Ah, this is easier to answer. The reason lies in a battle between hormones and the brain. He feels "I want sex with her tonight, and will do anything to get it". The horniness feeling induced by hormones overrides logical thinking, and the ability to look out for signals indicating that she expects more. The hormones induce impulsive disturbance signals to the brain, which counteracts with regular brain functionality. Our brain then reacts according to this signal involuntarily.

However, if men take conscious control, and look out for signals indicating that the woman expects something more, then the impact of signal 1 interferes with conscious control and can be suppressed. However, it takes experience to look out for these signals and control the sexual urge simultaneously, which most young men lack. That's the best explanation I could offer.

[Memphis1979]

Great sex only goes so far. Sooner or later, the passion will die, and then the sex. What are you left with? Nothing but wasted time and broken hearts.

No, there needs to be more substantial similarities and affection for more than a fling. Nothing wrong with flings, but when I look for a woman, I'm seeking my other half.

[MMorena]

Originally Posted by Mikala43

EVERYONE is judged on how they dress/present themselves. When you meet people you form an instant opinion subconsciously. We choose the image we want to present. If I went to a corporate job interview, unkept and wearing the cocktail dress and shoes from the night before...... they are not going to hire me no matter how good my resume is. Why? I don't look like the kind of person they want to work with. Is that fair? Well, it is the way it is.

Most people do not want to get into an long conversation to see what type of person you are. Who has the time to do that with each person we meet? So you go on first impressions.

I don't believe people should get a first impression and decide as fact what type of person they are, but you do it as a guideline. Sure the biker guy might be super sweet and volunteer at the SPCA, but it would not be the "type" of person I would want for a relationship.

If your running around showing as much of your body as possible, then people are going to assume you want attention to your body. You are the one highlighting it.

Corporations have dress codes for both genders, because they are establishing the type of company they want to project.

This is not rocket science.

Well thank you for the reply but you honestly restated what I wrote, so I'm not quite sure where the "duh, this is not rocket science" attitude is coming from

[MMorena]

Originally Posted by Magnatomicflux

Same reason women do it.

Thanks, but can we leave out the political correctness? Sure women do it, but it is certainly less common, primarily out of the fear that a woman will be "**** shamed."

Originally Posted by Adi from the Brunswicks

Ah, this is easier to answer. The reason lies in a battle between hormones and the brain. He feels "I want sex with her tonight, and will do anything to get it". The horniness feeling induced by hormones overrides logical thinking, and the ability to look out for signals indicating that she expects more. The hormones induce impulsive disturbance signals to the brain, which counteracts with regular brain functionality. Our brain then reacts according to this signal involuntarily.

However, if men take conscious control, and look out for signals indicating that the woman expects something more, then the impact of signal 1 interferes with conscious control and can be suppressed. However, it takes experience to look out for these signals and control the sexual urge simultaneously, which most young men lack. That's the best explanation I could offer.

Wonderful. Thank you, it certainly would make sense. It just goes to show that sometimes it doesn't matter how you carry yourself, dress, or act sometimes people will see what they want to see or as you said, miss those important cues.

Originally Posted by Memphis1979

Great sex only goes so far. Sooner or later, the passion will die, and then the sex. What are you left with? Nothing but wasted time and broken hearts.

No, there needs to be more substantial similarities and affection for more than a fling. Nothing wrong with flings, but when I look for a woman, I'm seeking my other half.

Of course nothing is wrong with a fling, if that's what two people want; but I am in agreement with you, I'd prefer something a little more substantial.