How come guys aren't aggressive w/ me in the bedroom (movies, sex)
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
no, its been a while since you posted, and we get a lot of "I want attention" seekers here
Quote:
Originally Posted by undominated
I do the subtle hints. At drinks/dinner I flirt, cross and uncross my legs, touch my date a lot. I try not to be too obvious but I have whispered dirty stuff in someone ear before, mention that I'm not wearing any panties, etc.
During sex I'm a little vocal. No screaming but I do whine a bit and moan. I like hard thrusting, biting, shoving and being pinned underneath.
I see what you mean about becoming comfortable with someone. It's just that I don't spend a lot of time on one guy if they don't give it to me the way I need it right away. I feel like a naughty daughter pushing my dad to punish me or something. Plus, after five dates and sex, if I'm still not getting what I want I don't want to have to "teach" anyone anything, as selfish as that sounds. Building up tension is one thing, but teaching someone a bunch of tricks in hope that they'll get good isn't my thing. And it's a major turnoff.
Crossing and uncrossing your legs may be a little to inconspicuous. Many men won't catch onto that. The fact you whimper may slow a guy down until he knows you.
Certainly, after 5 sexual encounters should be more than enough to be comfortable. I agree at that point you're having to teach and thats not what you want. Totally understandable.
I wasn't saying whisper dirty things in his ear, but a nibble on the lobe would be enough for me to know your intentions. Hell, I've walked up to a girl at a bar and said, "you look like you need to be chocked" this worked for me, but I was younger with a little less brains then I do now.
My issue has always getting beyond the first date because I am rather a nice guy, a gentleman, and treat a lady with the upmost respect while on a date, any date. After I've gotten to know them, then I'll start showing my freak flag a little more. By the fifth time sexually with someone, you'd know at least some of what they were into. Hell I dated a girl who told me to bite harder, to the point where I drew blood, she was into it, lets roll.
As I've said, dominating men in real life, often want to be dominated in the bedroom. If you look for more "nice guys, or even submissive looking men to date, they'll likely be turned on more when you ask for them to be rough with you in the bedroom. I like to dominate, I enjoy playing caveman, but thats not all guys.
Yeah, really. She's getting the attention she was looking for, anyway. As soon as I saw the topic of her thread, I knew she would.
I'm with the other poster who said there isn't a woman out there who wants her man (or men) to make love to her like a pansy.
I have had one PM, for the record. And the person isn't in my area
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77
When there is sexual tension and the guy wants you bad and you finally give in, is when it gets crazy.
I KNOW! I looove the tension. If I could bottle that feeling and sell it, I would. It's hot hot and so addicting.
Quote:
Originally Posted by david0966
I think the bolded sums it up well. I've never had to "fake" passion with women that I am really into. I've dated a lot, and there are many women I was attracted to, but not the "gotta have her now" type. Others there was an instant attraction. Unfortunately, I just think the men you have been with fall into the first category. With that said, communication is extremely important. Not every woman wants what you described, some even prefer to be the dominant. So, until a man gets to really know you well (or it's obvious he knows what you want by your verbal or non-verbal cues) he will be cautious.
I mean, it's fine if they don't think I'm all that. Then why waste my time? I want someone passionate and into me, not a dude who has to fake it. I wouldn't be offended if I was told that, like "hey I like you but not enough to where i gotta have you now". But that goes against what I'm looking for and I hate having my time wasted.
I think I'm cute, haha. I'm attractive. I'm feminine. Guys tell me I'm sexy so I know I'm not a bridge troll. I'm not shy in the bedroom. If someone doesn't feel that way about me, fine, but I need a way to weed out those dudes.
Quote:
Originally Posted by MMorena
YaFace seems interested
OP you better learn how to be a bit more expressive in the bedroom if you want a man to please you, clearly you aren't prudish so I see no reason why you must be shy, speak up and if speaking up isn't working match your tone with your intent. The fact that you don't "want" to be vocal about your desires and just want a mindreader makes me think that your actions in the bedroom aren't aligning with what you say you want here and that may be confusing for your guys. You've got to convince him that you're into dominant, aggressive sex, so if you want to be dominated then be a bit more aggressive, kiss more passionately and show the guy how you want things done and once he begins to pick up on it let him take the lead.
I'll work on that. You can lead a horse to water but can't make it drink. I don't mind guiding, but I will not spoon feed.
Quote:
Originally Posted by VanillaChocolate
Agreed. Speaking up is a key. I know you say you hate requesting passion. But you're mixing up passion and rough sex. The 2 aren't one thing, nor mutually exclusive.
I'm speaking of both. Things tend to naturally get a bit more aggressive with passion, and passion I don't want to ask for because it makes it feel unauthentic. Rough sex is great but more so I want passion. I'm not asking to be sent to the hospital, I just want to feel wanted when a guy is inside of me.
no, its been a while since you posted, and we get a lot of "I want attention" seekers here
Crossing and uncrossing your legs may be a little to inconspicuous. Many men won't catch onto that. The fact you whimper may slow a guy down until he knows you.
Certainly, after 5 sexual encounters should be more than enough to be comfortable. I agree at that point you're having to teach and thats not what you want. Totally understandable.
I wasn't saying whisper dirty things in his ear, but a nibble on the lobe would be enough for me to know your intentions. Hell, I've walked up to a girl at a bar and said, "you look like you need to be chocked" this worked for me, but I was younger with a little less brains then I do now.
My issue has always getting beyond the first date because I am rather a nice guy, a gentleman, and treat a lady with the upmost respect while on a date, any date. After I've gotten to know them, then I'll start showing my freak flag a little more. By the fifth time sexually with someone, you'd know at least some of what they were into. Hell I dated a girl who told me to bite harder, to the point where I drew blood, she was into it, lets roll.
As I've said, dominating men in real life, often want to be dominated in the bedroom. If you look for more "nice guys, or even submissive looking men to date, they'll likely be turned on more when you ask for them to be rough with you in the bedroom. I like to dominate, I enjoy playing caveman, but thats not all guys.
Okay, thanks for the tips!
I have dated "nice" guys but their personality is off putting, especially if they act beta. I'll give it another shot though.
I have dated "nice" guys but their personality is off putting, especially if they act beta. I'll give it another shot though.
LOL... I have never seen a woman use the term "beta" on this site... it's always what the young early 20's somethings say... same goes with ragging on "nice" guys... never seen women here do that...
LOL... I have never seen a woman use the term "beta" on this site... it's always what the young early 20's somethings say... same goes with ragging on "nice" guys... never seen women here do that...
Yep, I got a feeling from the first post that this was another person yanking our chain.
I do give it a 5/10 though; it was a bit more entertaining than usual.
Yep, I got a feeling from the first post that this was another person yanking our chain.
I do give it a 5/10 though; it was a bit more entertaining than usual.
I don't get posts like these. If you feel like I'm a waste of keyboard strokes then why bother? I'm asking a question. I have tried to be honest. This is an issue I need help with. I'm not here to "entertain you". I'm here asking for tips because I'm unsatisfied with my sex life.
Now go away.
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.