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well you all seem to think that being in our 60,s makes us inhuman and cant make mistakes but I assure you we can and I did,i just didn't think the results would be like this.take the **** if you like but I hope it never happens to you guys
OP, this is a VERY complicated situation, and a good example of "Be careful what you wish for."
Fantasies usually seem like a great idea until we are face to face with them, and then, as you now know, they can leave us very vulnerable.
The feelings you are having need to be dealt with under the care of a professional therapist. I suggest you and your wife seek out a marriage counselor so you can have a safe place to express and work through your feelings. We cannot help you here.
ive spent an entire week crying and trying to come to terms with it all but cant.i know I,m mostly to blame for not being honest with my feelings about it but now my feeling about my wife not caring anough to check on my first are destroying me.
Maybe you and your wife can explore other alternative ways to improve sex life? You two are probably the kind of people who have troubles separating sex from love. (Which is common)
I say you need to stop the crying because you don't want to deal with depression. Talk to a therapist and address your issue. Best of luck. Nobody is cheating, nobody is "destroying" you. Accept that first perhaps will make you feel better.
well you all seem to think that being in our 60,s makes us inhuman and cant make mistakes but I assure you we can and I did,i just didn't think the results would be like this.take the **** if you like but I hope it never happens to you guys
It would never happen to us because we would not ask for this to happen. We've talked through the "what ifs" and know there would be hurt feelings.
You really don't get to be mad, it was your idea. It just didn't happen exactly like you thought. Let it go and learn your lesson.
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my wife and I have been married for 47 years and have been very happy,we love one another but our sex lives became a bit boring and stale,we have very old and close friends who asked us if we would swing with them,my wife said straight away no and she was disappointed in me for not saying no immediately.we talked about it and I suppose I convinced her it would be funso after a week she said yes she would I asked if she was really up for it and she said yes 100%,we arranged it and the weekend of going up to our friends spent time helping one another get ready buying underwear and grooming each other which was an enormous turn on.i felt twinges of fear but ignored them as I expected to feel some discomfort about it but my wife had none of these which actually made me even more excited.i had said all along that I wanted the sex to happen in the same room as I wanted to be with her all the time,but she insisted it had to be in separate rooms,i did feel uneasy with this but went along with it or it would,nt happen at all,she said she could,nt watch me have sex with another woman.on the night I was nervous and jumpy as hell but my wife was as cool as you could be and in fact started the ball rolling asking my mate to go into the bedroom with her,immediatly I felt panic.my pal said he had to go to the toilet first and could we all have a group hug when he came out .I went to the bathroom to try to get my mind in order as to why I was panicing and decided to call a halt to it all but on emerging from the bathroom found they had gone into the bedroom while I was not there.my whole world seemed to collapse thenand I said at the top of my voice where has the hug gone and could,nt you wait for me to come out.my mates wife came to me saying come on it will be ok ,my mind was going crazy but I didn't open their door to stop it I don't know why but I could do anything with my mates wife and told her I,m sorry but I cant do this.then I went out and shouted to the others that it has finished and they have to stop.thery did stop and came out in dressing gowns.he had not been abkle to maintain and erection so couldn't penetrate her but she had an orgasm during oral. I,m heartbroken about all this.its not the sex I,m ok with that but its the fact she didn't wait to check at the very last moment I was ok, which I wasn't and now I feel they went in quickly so as not to give me the chance to stop them.ive spent an entire week crying and trying to come to terms with it all but cant.i know I,m mostly to blame for not being honest with my feelings about it but now my feeling about my wife not caring anough to check on my first are destroying me.
Says the 19 year old pimple faced kid staring at the warm glow of his computer screen
thank you all for your advice some of it very good and some of you actually felt a bit for me.i am in a mess and the councelling seems my best bet here soo I,ll talk to my wife and give it a try.age doesn't come into it and when those who express distain at it realise as they get older we still have needs and feelings.and they will be there one day I hope they remember then to be above all that life thing
i hear what you're saying op and for a while my wife well she's my ex-wife really but i'm talking about when we were married we discussed whether we could do such a thing but decided it was too much stress and besides all our friends weren't very attractive so even if it did work out what would be the point to all of it i hope your counseling sessions helps because it didn't help us any it probably would if we had gone i suppose.
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