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View Poll Results: Is a man who uses escorts more attractive than an older virgin?
Yes 9 27.27%
No 24 72.73%
Voters: 33. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 11-21-2014, 02:43 AM
 
Location: Cincinnati, Ohio
688 posts, read 896,030 times
Reputation: 755

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Does experience really matter all that much? Every man and woman is different and have different needs to satisfy.

One could say that you're always a virgin if you're with a new partner, no? I mean, the basics of sex are almost instinctive. A great lover takes into consideration the needs of the individual, which previous experience has little or no bearing.

At least as a virgin, you can rest assured they are clean.

 
Old 11-21-2014, 06:08 AM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,838,343 times
Reputation: 40634
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesthebass View Post
One could say that you're always a virgin if you're with a new partner, no?

Not even remotely.
 
Old 11-21-2014, 06:53 AM
 
408 posts, read 720,703 times
Reputation: 278
Quote:
Originally Posted by lovesthebass View Post
Does experience really matter all that much?.
Well most people lose their virginity by their teen years and are already married by my age. The fact that I haven't had that experience yet makes me stand out and makes people wonder "what's wrong with him?". And honestly it makes me feel insecure as well since I know many women will judge me for it. Women especially attractive women with options are very unlikely to date a virgin.
 
Old 11-21-2014, 07:46 AM
 
Location: Philly
702 posts, read 538,175 times
Reputation: 973
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sjd1 View Post
Well most people lose their virginity by their teen years and are already married by my age. The fact that I haven't had that experience yet makes me stand out and makes people wonder "what's wrong with him?". And honestly it makes me feel insecure as well since I know many women will judge me for it. Women especially attractive women with options are very unlikely to date a virgin.
I lost my virginity when I was 25 and didn't have sex again until I was 30. I know people who "saved themselves" for marriage until their late 30s. I know women who have been raped, heroin addicts, I've had girlfriends tell me was carrying STDs after we started dating. We are not perfect people, we all have our insecurities and shameful secrets.

Now let me ask you something. If you met a woman that knocked you off your feet, a woman that made your heart jump when you looked at her, and stop when she smiled back at you... if you met a woman that made you laugh, feel good about yourself, and safe when you talked to her... would you be discouraged if she told you that she was molested as a kid? Would you walk away if she told you she had slept with a lot of different men when she was single? That her parents were dead, that her brother is in prison, or that she has herpes?

The whole point of a relationship is that you share these secrets about yourself with the other person, and they look at that, and they look at you, and they embrace your unvarnished reality. You don't have to hide your shame about your lack of sexual exprience, heck, you don't even need to be ashamed of it.
 
Old 11-21-2014, 08:07 AM
 
Location: Denville, NJ
157 posts, read 217,680 times
Reputation: 123
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sjd1 View Post
Well most people lose their virginity by their teen years and are already married by my age. The fact that I haven't had that experience yet makes me stand out and makes people wonder "what's wrong with him?". And honestly it makes me feel insecure as well since I know many women will judge me for it. Women especially attractive women with options are very unlikely to date a virgin.
Perhaps this was already mentioned earlier in the thread, but I'm trying to understand what kind of behavior you're exuding that is "making you stand out" in a bad way. Are you vocal about it? And even in the unlikely event that the subject is brought up, why is it such a big deal to you what other people think?
 
Old 11-21-2014, 08:32 AM
 
7,492 posts, read 11,802,433 times
Reputation: 7394
No.
 
Old 11-21-2014, 08:32 AM
 
Location: Jupiter
10,216 posts, read 8,285,738 times
Reputation: 8628
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackjack2000 View Post
I lost my virginity when I was 25 and didn't have sex again until I was 30. I know people who "saved themselves" for marriage until their late 30s. I know women who have been raped, heroin addicts, I've had girlfriends tell me was carrying STDs after we started dating. We are not perfect people, we all have our insecurities and shameful secrets.

Now let me ask you something. If you met a woman that knocked you off your feet, a woman that made your heart jump when you looked at her, and stop when she smiled back at you... if you met a woman that made you laugh, feel good about yourself, and safe when you talked to her... would you be discouraged if she told you that she was molested as a kid? Would you walk away if she told you she had slept with a lot of different men when she was single? That her parents were dead, that her brother is in prison, or that she has herpes?

The whole point of a relationship is that you share these secrets about yourself with the other person, and they look at that, and they look at you, and they embrace your unvarnished reality. You don't have to hide your shame about your lack of sexual exprience, heck, you don't even need to be ashamed of it.
Yes, I would walk away. Women won't accept me for small flaws, why should I accept theirs?
 
Old 11-21-2014, 08:45 AM
 
5,121 posts, read 6,788,364 times
Reputation: 5833
Quote:
Originally Posted by 49ersfan27 View Post
Yes, I would walk away. Women won't accept me for small flaws, why should I accept theirs?
Because women as a whole haven't rejected you for small flaws... some women have and in the scenario given, that woman has accepted you (presumably) because she's confiding in you. All three and a half billion women in the world don't think with a hive mind and plot and plan together. It would be like me saying because the three men I've dated since the summer have asked me about marriage, all men will including you because you will ask me about marriage because you are part of XY chromosome club.

Going back to the virgin thing, look OP, for the most part people don't care. Like others said, unless you are doing something weird (like walking around with a tee-shirt on saying, "I am a virgin and it bothers me," women aren't going to know or care. And once you meet someone, yeah, it might be a bit of a surprise, but if the woman is worth her salt and a decent person, she's not going to leave you over it. And if she does have a hang up about it, honestly, you are better off without her type anyway.
 
Old 11-21-2014, 08:51 AM
 
Location: Jupiter
10,216 posts, read 8,285,738 times
Reputation: 8628
Quote:
Originally Posted by jillabean View Post
Because women as a whole haven't rejected you for small flaws... some women have and in the scenario given, that woman has accepted you (presumably) because she's confiding in you. All three and a half billion women in the world don't think with a hive mind and plot and plan together. It would be like me saying because the three men I've dated since the summer have asked me about marriage, all men will including you because you will ask me about marriage because you are part of XY chromosome club.

Going back to the virgin thing, look OP, for the most part people don't care. Like others said, unless you are doing something weird (like walking around with a tee-shirt on saying, "I am a virgin and it bothers me," women aren't going to know or care. And once you meet someone, yeah, it might be a bit of a surprise, but if the woman is worth her salt and a decent person, she's not going to leave you over it. And if she does have a hang up about it, honestly, you are better off without her type anyway.
That's half of the majority of women eliminated from my dating pool. Most women don't want to go out with an introverted geek like myself and most of the women here say so.
 
Old 11-21-2014, 08:58 AM
 
Location: RI, MA, VT, WI, IL, CA, IN (that one sucked), KY
41,938 posts, read 36,838,343 times
Reputation: 40634
Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackjack2000 View Post
Now let me ask you something. If you met a woman that knocked you off your feet, a woman that made your heart jump when you looked at her, and stop when she smiled back at you... if you met a woman that made you laugh, feel good about yourself, and safe when you talked to her... would you be discouraged if she told you that she was molested as a kid? Would you walk away if she told you she had slept with a lot of different men when she was single? That her parents were dead, that her brother is in prison, or that she has herpes?

Of course not. And I haven't. My current ladyfriend's parents are dead. She partied a lot 14-30 or so, and she would again if single, I'm sure. These aren't negatives. They're part of living and life.

And sheesh, if we wouldn't consider dating someone that has been the victim of sexual assault, well cross of another huge segment of the female population (unfortunately).
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