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Old 12-01-2014, 11:41 AM
 
192 posts, read 145,392 times
Reputation: 75

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I had what I thought was a very good date with a very attractive woman a week ago this past Friday. We met on-line and got together for drinks. Conversation was great. We each got a second drink. She was sharing hers with me. She seemed genuinely interested in my work, as I was with hers.

I walked her to her car and gave her a hug and kiss on the cheek. She seemed like she wanted me to actually kiss her. Not sure why I didn't.

Anyway, once I was home I texted her an hour later and just said it was nice to meet her and I hope she made it home safely. She sent what I perceived to be a flirtatious text back that she was home and warm and cozy and thank you. I said nice, if you'd like together again I'll give you a call mid-week. She said that would be great.

I called on Wednesday and have not heard back. It was right before the holiday, and she did say she was going out of state. But still, it seems odd.

Any thoughts? Right now I feel like under no circumstances should I follow up.

 
Old 12-01-2014, 11:45 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,333 posts, read 41,880,675 times
Reputation: 83247
It was a holiday. Give her one more chance.
 
Old 12-01-2014, 11:46 AM
 
1,350 posts, read 2,470,055 times
Reputation: 1804
Call her again today or tomorrow. If she gets back to you, it's game on. Otherwise it means she's lost interest (or didn't have any real interest to begin with).

It's been my experience that the holidays are one of the worst times to meet someone new. People tend to go out of town to see family + friends and the momentum gets lost. You sorta have to start over when the other person returns, and it's possible that if the two of you just met up once and briefly, the other person could go cold.

Not saying that's what's going on with this girl, though, so good luck.
 
Old 12-01-2014, 11:46 AM
 
192 posts, read 145,392 times
Reputation: 75
So don't write her off but don't follow-up?
 
Old 12-01-2014, 11:50 AM
 
Location: On the corner of Grey Street
6,075 posts, read 8,372,651 times
Reputation: 11560
Why don't you send her a quick text today or tomorrow asking how her holiday was? I think the holidays are a rough time to get something started. I would cut her a little slack in this situation since she replied initially and you know she was out of town.
 
Old 12-01-2014, 11:55 AM
 
Location: Middle America
36,665 posts, read 41,948,231 times
Reputation: 50533
Eh, holiday...benefit of the doubt.

But, if you don't hear back, don't sweat it...for all you know, she's dating multiple people. Somebody who is truly interested WILL make a point to get back to you.

I met my husband three days before going out of state to see my family for ten days at Christmastime two years ago. We went out on three dates in a row leading up to my leaving, and stayed in contact the whole time I was gone. I got back into town the day before New Year's Eve, we went out for New Year's Eve, and have been together ever since. If somebody wants to see you, they will not lose contact. If they don't contact you, they don't want to see you that badly.
 
Old 12-01-2014, 11:56 AM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,333 posts, read 41,880,675 times
Reputation: 83247
Quote:
Originally Posted by returning_to_dating View Post
So don't write her off but don't follow-up?
Correct.
 
Old 12-01-2014, 11:57 AM
 
324 posts, read 322,051 times
Reputation: 631
I agree with strawberrykiki.

A quick text asking about the holiday is pressure free and a nice ice breaker to open communication back up again. If she's interested, you'll probably get a text saying how she noticed your call, but was so busy with the holiday, etc., and you guys are back up and running towards a second date.
 
Old 12-01-2014, 12:05 PM
 
Location: Middle America
36,665 posts, read 41,948,231 times
Reputation: 50533
You could even send a text saying, "Hope you had a great holiday," which opens the door for a response, but doesn't demand one. If it goes unreturned, you'll have your answer.
 
Old 12-01-2014, 12:56 PM
 
3,786 posts, read 3,003,058 times
Reputation: 7555
I agree with following up once more. What do you have to lose? If she agrees to see you again, man up and kiss her next time.
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