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There are reasons why I worried and not bond well with him during sex. I think it due to my dysfunctional mother from my childhood.
But then it also about "him" as a person, I just have so much worries about him. I don't know why I'm not enjoying sex as I should be
I don't have healthy relationship wtih this guy.
And thank you for all the serious replies, I'm trying to make my relationship healthy, I just don't know how to fix it.
And Wmsn4Life, maybe if you read my original thread, you can see other posters viewpoints. They also agree with him hang around with his druggie friends is not a good idea.
Few months ago, I did start thread asking for advice on here; about the incident happened between us when I confront him in that druggie apartment friends of his. Is this consider to be abuse? he have anger? serious opinion needed, plz no steretype
Seem like we been having problem months ago, probably have problems since we first start dating.
I don't need to read your original thread. This one has plenty of problems - too many, in fact, for me to know the best way to advise you.
My opinion? It's bad that he hangs out with gang-bangers. I also think it's weird that YOU think it's weird to sleep with someone from your hood. It's not as if he is your brother.
Also, if you've been sleeping together for a few months now, it's time for you to stop calling yourself "sexually inexperienced." It's your choice to be so closed off. To be honest, you sound very immature and you don't sound like you know yourself well enough to be sharing yourself with someone.
Unless the two of you have plans to leave the hood, the chances of him hanging out with any other friends are very slim. So if you can't live with the way he is living RIGHT NOW, then you should break up.
Yes, you right Wmsn4Life,
I need to learn to how to open myself up emotinally to him. Cater him physically sex and cook him food is not enough. Sometimes I do feel that he better off finding another girl, then he be more happy.
I am Financially Independent, I have my own job, and I never spend a penny from him.
I learn to be independemt early in life so I can get out from the hell house of my abusive mother. So No, I am not Financlly immature. I am just Emotionally immature.
We are saving up to get out of the hood. It definately won't be easy to save up enough to buy a house, when both of our jobs doesn't pay well.
I dont' have a college degree, I dropped out of college (by choice) because I need to work full time to feed myself.
And being a college dropped out sure didn't help my English grammar neither (obviously everyone can see from my English)
I work in Retails, I got pay hourly and get sales commission. One good thing living in the hood is the rent here CHEAP, and it does help save up money every month.
But l live alone here with a poodle, maybe emotionally I am trying to protect myself.
We have plan to save up to move out. But I don't want to leave his mother aolone here in the hood. If we move out, we need to rent somewhere close to here so he can drive back and forth to help out his mom.
Or if we buy a house, we can take her with us. But no way we can have neough money to buy a house now.
And you right, I pretty have no choice regarding his druggie friends. I just wish he know that he putting himself in dangerous situation when he hanging around iwth them.
Thank you for your straightforward advice, does make me think about my future and where I am with this guy.
Happy New Year to you. And thanks for not judge my situation of where we living right now, it normal to have things like these in the ghetto.
One word: therapy. You cannot expect to be in a healthy relationship until you work out your issues, especially if your in a relationship where you don't completely trust the guy.
Yes, you right Wmsn4Life,
I need to learn to how to open myself up emotinally to him. Cater him physically sex and cook him food is not enough. Sometimes I do feel that he better off finding another girl, then he be more happy.
I am Financially Independent, I have my own job, and I never spend a penny from him.
I learn to be independemt early in life so I can get out from the hell house of my abusive mother. So No, I am not Financlly immature. I am just Emotionally immature.
We are saving up to get out of the hood. It definately won't be easy to save up enough to buy a house, when both of our jobs doesn't pay well.
I dont' have a college degree, I dropped out of college (by choice) because I need to work full time to feed myself.
And being a college dropped out sure didn't help my English grammar neither (obviously everyone can see from my English)
I work in Retails, I got pay hourly and get sales commission. One good thing living in the hood is the rent here CHEAP, and it does help save up money every month.
But l live alone here with a poodle, maybe emotionally I am trying to protect myself.
We have plan to save up to move out. But I don't want to leave his mother aolone here in the hood. If we move out, we need to rent somewhere close to here so he can drive back and forth to help out his mom.
Or if we buy a house, we can take her with us. But no way we can have neough money to buy a house now.
And you right, I pretty have no choice regarding his druggie friends. I just wish he know that he putting himself in dangerous situation when he hanging around iwth them.
Thank you for your straightforward advice, does make me think about my future and where I am with this guy.
Happy New Year to you. And thanks for not judge my situation of where we living right now, it normal to have things like these in the ghetto.
Well, happy new year to you too!
It sounds like you are doing pretty well in spite of your circumstances. Be sure you use excellent birth control, and I agree that therapy would help you be a healthier partner in relationships, when you get to a stage when you can afford that.
If the thread is about eye contact during sex? OMG I love that. Looking into her eyes is the best part of seeing if she is into you or not, and can be a major turn on.
One word: therapy. You cannot expect to be in a healthy relationship until you work out your issues, especially if your in a relationship where you don't completely trust the guy.
Well therapy requires having a good health insurance and/or money. Based on what OP wrote, she might not have either.
And also therapy might help only if a person is open to it. Which usually means white, middle or better off Americans. Not sure how open to therapy OP is...
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