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This is why I'm not a fan of people who want to "share everything" included sex partner number and details. Nothing good come of it and honestly as long as someone is clean and doesn't have STD's I don't care and don't want to know.
I get to some people sex is a very important thing and its hard to wrap your head around having 10 or more partners but honestly I did that in a week at college on a regular basis. Not that sex isn't important but I was at a crazy young stupid point in my life and enjoyed it at the time, today probably not so much.
Exactly!
He was an idiot to share that information with a very young and very immature woman who can't handle the reality of the situation, that he's an older man with a past.
sounds like you got it dead right, thanks.
I do suffer from anxiety and depression, and some forms of OCD. So I guess it would makes sense if these were all linked.
If you keep pushing him you will end up pushing him out the door. You need to quit talking about it and obsessing about his past. He knows how you feel and he still loves you. Being jealous about his past relationships sets you up for being a jealous and possessive wife which is not a good combination.
lover29, Ms. OP, your thread remind me of my thread on here "Was it just physical sex to him?"
Listen. I was a virgin when I sleep with my BF.
He was honest to the point that he told me he have quite some '1 night stand' in his past, where he see it as "purely physical sex' to him.
But he make it clear that he always wore a condom with his '1 night stand' simply becauue he doesn't know those girls well, and he doesn't want to pay for child support. Fair right?
..........
BUT he was stupid to share all that with me, becasue he would just scare a virgin girl.
well I wasn't scare but I do get shaky, but I end up sleep wtih him anwyays, lol
U just going to have to accept your BF as who he is. I accepted alot of things about my BF chilhood, as well as his sexual past.
Worried about how he treats you in bed. Was he caring? Did he care about how you feel in bed too? Or was it just for his needs only? Did he look at you during sex? Alot of kisses during sex? etc...
Can you tell me how he is in bed? Is he caring in bed like how he is outside of bed?
My BF is a freak, he would stare at my facial expression during sex. It sure doesn't make me comfortable, but heck, I guess I have to put up with that too if I want to be with him.
So you are just like me, you have 2 choice, accept him for his sexual past, or leave the relationship, it simple.
oh wait, OP is 18-19 and her man is 28-29 (late twenties) that is quite an age gap right there, especially she say she lost it to him at age 18, but heck they both are over the legal age, so dunno what to say
I guess I'm a late boomer. I didn't lost my V-card until I was 29, and my BF was 28, now I feel like I'm a cougar, LOL
and you guys stop scaring me with the STD talk, my BF have alot of '1 night stands' too, but he was smart to wear a condom, and I think condom should be safe when it come to protect from pregnancy, std and hiv. i hope
Is he still sleeping with all of his past sexual partners? If not, it has absolutely NO bearing on your relationship with him today.
To make an issue where there is none is self sabotage. There's simply no reason to be jealous of past sexual partners unless you're immature and insecure. There's nothing that can be done to change the past, so move forward.
Yes but every number multiplied by that number is that number, not one. 1*20 = 20, not 1. So guess what? your chances are much higher especially if you are having casual sex since those sexual partners probably have a high count too. So it goes like 1*20*20*45 and that for sure is not equal to 1.
I am not being an alarmist. And I am no prude and for sure not a religious person with an agenda. I think some young women are being brainwashed into thinking "it's ok darling, all men are dogs" when statistically that's not even true.
No woman needs to settle for a manslut who has been exposed to all kinds of viruses, fungi, bacteria and even insects and if somebody feels that need, you better get tested before you have sex but just be aware HPV cannot be tested on men so there is no guarantee his sexual past will not hurt you in the future.
I have a friend who caught it first time out with a guy who didn't have much experience.
Oh. And one who got pregnant first time she ever had sex.
I agree that probabilities increase with number of partners, but if a person is disease free, they're no more likely to give you a disease than a person who never had sex.
Someone having been exposed to something they never caught is just as disease free as someone who was never exposed.
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OP is obviously another one of those who thinks sex is sacred and special and you only do it with "the one" and all that jazz, so she should find someone that shares her mindset.
OP, i get where you are coming from, i just recently got out of a relationship with my gf because of a few things, one being her past and not so distant past. She had moved a year ago to my area and she went absolutely wild and slept with about 10 guys in just a few months that she lived here until she met me. Well the problem began that whenever we would go out to bars or danceclubs we would run into those guys and one specific bar we went to 2 of them worked at! It was absolutely driving me insane and i confronted her about it many times how much it bothered me but she kept reassuring me they meant nothing to her and i was the only one in her life. Enough was enough when we ran into them again on NYE and i just couldn't handle it anymore and i broke it off. Mind you there were other issues we were having too that contributed to it, but that was a major factor.
Plus when she was a little younger she posed in Playboy, and dated quite a few wealthy men who would just shower her with gifts and spoil her including one that was 50 years old when she was 25! That was something i felt i couldn't compete with, it took over my mind and just became too much.
So i warn you, if it is consuming you and bothering you so much that you just can't let it go no matter what like i did, then you need to end it before you get even more emotionally involved. Take it from me, i learned the hard way. Good luck
Take it from me, i learned the hard way. Good luck
What did you learn? Just that you couldn't handle it?
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