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1) And yet, every guy here will maintain otherwise. So we're left with 2 options: either a) OP is wrong, or b) we have to admit that not everyone around here is truly honest with themselves, which means that a WHOLE lot of garbage being spewed in other threads about their "experiences" is crap.
2) Again.
3) The OP wasn't "addressing" anybody. She was venting about not being catered to in a way she wanted. Those aforementioned "can't get a second date" threads pale by comparison to the first, to the point of almost uselessness.
You wouldn't know what women's experience is. The advantage to participating on a co-ed forum is that you have a chance to find out. You have a window onto women's lives and how they think about their experience. As I recall, you're the guy who said he doesn't believe men walk away from women who approach them, walk away without speaking to them or giving themselves a chance to find out what the approach is about (for example--sex). Women don't make this stuff up. The 3rd option you left out is simply that you, and some of the other guys here, haven't witnessed what the poster has experienced. That doesn't mean it hasn't happened.
Quoted below. The first bolded is a form of address. She's speaking directly to her target audience in her post. Using the second person form of the verb is = addressing one or more people.
Quote:
Originally Posted by stava
I had a date this weekend that was probably the biggest dud of a date I've ever been on. Let me tell the men something that will help you get to the second date:
MAKE HER FEEL COMFORTABLE. Ask questions about her. Make an effort to put her at ease. Act interested.
Yes, you might be shy or horribly nervous. Maybe your social skills aren't that great. But a first date is the time to put these shortcomings aside and make an effort to make HER feel special. The more you get stuck in yourself, paralyzed by your insecurities, the less your date is going to feel welcome, safe, and wanted in your presence. She doesn't know that you're nervous - all she knows is that you seem uncomfortable and can't get out of your own head enough to focus on her needs.
Make it a point to practice selflessness on your next date. Think along the lines of, "How can I make this night great for HER? How can I show her that she is special to me?" THAT is the way to a woman's heart.
Simple, but you'd be surprised how many guys don't get this.
You havent read all my replies. Youre just bitter, hate women and are trolling. If any of your replies to me were based in truth or a sincere opinion then I would care.
They actually become more self-centered and entitled as the thread continues. It's like reading the slow descent of a mad(woman). Somehow, men can continue to get dates despite the insane demands of the entitled.
You wouldn't know what women's experience is. The advantage to participating on a co-ed forum is that you have a chance to find out. You have a window onto women's lives and how they think about their experience. As I recall, you're the guy who said he doesn't believe men walk away from women who approach them, walk away without speaking to them or giving themselves a chance to find out what the approach is about (for example--sex). Women don't make this stuff up. The 3rd option you left out is simply that you, and some of the other guys here, haven't witnessed what the poster has experienced. That doesn't mean it didn't happen.
Quoted below. The first bolded is a form of address. She's speaking directly to her target audience in her post.
Conversely, you wouldn't know the OP's experience as well, seeing as we're both strangers to her. You feel more empathic towards her because of your gender, but despite that, we both have an equivalent insight to the truthfulness of her experience.
However, they absolutely DO make these things up, just as men can and do.
Regarding the form of address; many a diatribe has been written with the proverbial "you" in mind, without needing an actual recipient. The OP is far more concerned with her own well being than assisting all those poor men here on CD that are having trouble with second dates. It is far more easily venting than advice of any kind.
Perhaps we should wait for the OP to elaborate before another 14 pages of speculation?
Or not.
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On a loosely related note, the women that are up in arms about how men "should" behave on dates are the ones most susceptible to being "played" by the men who know how this behavior works, and simply don't care. Expect equality (in date mannerisms, not the "greater political level" equality, which is a larger topic), get equality. Expect one-sided behavior, and men will (temporarily) provide it to get laid, then drop you because you're not worth the long-haul effort.
So you just assume women arent keen to men who play pretend in order to just have sex with us?
Personally, if a guy were after sex, I would just prefer he be upfront. um...err.... theoretically.
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Personally, if a guy were after sex, I would just prefer he be upfront. um...err.... theoretically.
Everyone would! But the teenage/college years are a bit of a "learning" period for us all. An older, wiser Hivemind doesn't have to resort to silliness like that anymore.
14 pages? You need to change your thread settings...I'm on page 4
Seriously?!!!
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