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I had a date this weekend that was probably the biggest dud of a date I've ever been on. Let me tell the men something that will help you get to the second date:
MAKE HER FEEL COMFORTABLE. Ask questions about her. Make an effort to put her at ease. Act interested.
Yes, you might be shy or horribly nervous. Maybe your social skills aren't that great. But a first date is the time to put these shortcomings aside and make an effort to make HER feel special. The more you get stuck in yourself, paralyzed by your insecurities, the less your date is going to feel welcome, safe, and wanted in your presence. She doesn't know that you're nervous - all she knows is that you seem uncomfortable and can't get out of your own head enough to focus on her needs.
Make it a point to practice selflessness on your next date. Think along the lines of, "How can I make this night great for HER? How can I show her that she is special to me?" THAT is the way to a woman's heart.
Simple, but you'd be surprised how many guys don't get this.
I had a date this weekend that was probably the biggest dud of a date I've ever been on. Let me tell the men something that will help you get to the second date:
MAKE HER FEEL COMFORTABLE. Ask questions about her. Make an effort to put her at ease. Act interested.
Yes, you might be shy or horribly nervous. Maybe your social skills aren't that great. But a first date is the time to put these shortcomings aside and make an effort to make HER feel special. The more you get stuck in yourself, paralyzed by your insecurities, the less your date is going to feel welcome, safe, and wanted in your presence. She doesn't know that you're nervous - all she knows is that you seem uncomfortable and can't get out of your own head enough to focus on her needs.
Make it a point to practice selflessness on your next date. Think along the lines of, "How can I make this night great for HER? How can I show her that she is special to me?" THAT is the way to a woman's heart.
Simple, but you'd be surprised how many guys don't get this.
Yeah, if you're so lacking in confidence you can barely speak, or alternatively, you run on and on about yourself, you're not ready to be dating yet.
Stava, It works both ways: I take responsibility for making guys feel welcome, safe, and wanted in my presence. I don't ever want a guy to go home feeling WORSE about him self than he already did, even if he isn't someone I want to see again. If he is feeling uncomfortable, I make an effort to smooth out the conversation.
Last edited by Stagemomma; 01-19-2015 at 03:42 PM..
Stava, It works both ways: I take responsibility for making guys feel welcome, safe, and wanted in your presence. I don't ever want a guy to go home feeling WORSE about him self than he already did, even if he isn't someone I want to see again.
I'm all for that. The woman shouldn't act aloof or off-putting either. But moreso than the woman, the guy should be making an effort to make sure she's having a good time.
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