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There are also women who like to fish for compliments so asking "Am I pretty?...Am I fat?..." is pretty much "Tell me I am pretty...Tell me I am not fat".
Of course I am not serious. It's an expression, a rather crass one but all in all, it means that if you don't care, nobody is going to help you and you might as well pack it in. Im a personal trainer so if you are with me, you are not going to be obese (BY CHOICE). You have no choice but to step it up. There are obviously ways to go about it and being tactful. But the wrong way is to keep status quo and relieve yourself of wrath. You would much rather them suffer from heart disease later on in life than risk being yelled at? Are they that weak of a person? Yes, because that is why we are where we are in America- 1/3 obese. If I can avoid telling you that you are fat, then can avoid tell you I am married. I see it one way, and you see it another but the end result is the same: avoidance of backlash!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
For what it's worth, I didn't believe you were serious. But it was simply not a very intelligent thing to say and I think you know it. You agree yourself there are ways to be tactful, so why not express this in your posts? It is absolutely possible to be honest without being a jerk. I know a lot of trainers, and the best ones have one thing in common: They can give a straight, honest answer in a very compassionate manner. Some of the less effective trainers I know care more about chest beating and "telling it like it is." If you are a trainer, I hope you fall into that first category. Early indicators say otherwise. If your reaction is to resort to the comment made you seem to favor the angry, fat-hating, chest-beater crowd. I don't know you, so I recognize the possibility (as well as I hope) I'm wrong.
If a woman asks you this question, you should always say "No." This is not a real question - it is a woman's way of indicating that she wants you to tell her she looks pretty. She's insecure about her looks, and she's looking for reassurance from you that you think she's beautiful. If you compliment her looks regularly, proactively, you won't hear this question.
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