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You have a paid for house you are happy with. Why take on debt because something is a good deal? It might not be a good deal for you. You have proven to be fiscally sharp.
If you think something is fishy, get legal advice tomorrow. You never can tell, she might be planning to move out and leave you to pay for her new digs. Depending on where you live, you may be responsible for your wife's debts, as she yours.
You have a paid for house you are happy with. Why take on debt because something is a good deal? It might not be a good deal for you. You have proven to be fiscally sharp.
If you think something is fishy, get legal advice tomorrow. You never can tell, she might be planning to move out and leave you to pay for her new digs. Depending on where you live, you may be responsible for your wife's debts, as she yours.
Red flag!
IF they're married. No confirmation from the OP, yet.
Well, your wife may have messed up big time - but if you want to stay married to her, you are both going to have to figure out what to do from here on out together. If it was only a hold payment that she put on the house - and she gave it to her SISTER - I can't imagine her sister not giving it back.
Now, if you DO want to stay married to her, then you need to keep that in mind when you are working this out.
I will divorce her before she get me out of this house. I don't spend all those time and money into learning things and busting my ass to build the house exactly as I want it just to move because my wife have her eyes on dollars sign.
The type of house that my wife want to buy, I don't think it can be rented out and if it can, I'd not trust anyone who rent it. It is a huge house, pretty much a mansion.
I think my wife just don't want to walk up to her sister and ask for all that money back and upset her. So she's trying to get me to agree to move.
What upset me even more is, I don't know if she put money into it before asking me for first time or after I say no in hope she can talk me into it.
I will divorce her before she get me out of this house. I don't spend all those time and money into learning things and busting my ass to build the house exactly as I want it just to move because my wife have her eyes on dollars sign.
The type of house that my wife want to buy, I don't think it can be rented out and if it can, I'd not trust anyone who rent it. It is a huge house, pretty much a mansion.
I think my wife just don't want to walk up to her sister and ask for all that money back and upset her. So she's trying to get me to agree to move.
What upset me even more is, I don't know if she put money into it before asking me for first time or after I say no in hope she can talk me into it.
Well, then you have your answer. She either agrees to do as you say or you divorce her. I don't think that you are in the wrong or that you are making the wrong decision - I just think you need to know how you feel before you talk to her. And you know how you feel. So - what advice were you looking for? I'm a bit confused. If you already know what you are going to do and where you stand - then what are you asking?
I will divorce her before she get me out of this house. I don't spend all those time and money into learning things and busting my ass to build the house exactly as I want it just to move because my wife have her eyes on dollars sign.
The type of house that my wife want to buy, I don't think it can be rented out and if it can, I'd not trust anyone who rent it. It is a huge house, pretty much a mansion.
I think my wife just don't want to walk up to her sister and ask for all that money back and upset her. So she's trying to get me to agree to move.
What upset me even more is, I don't know if she put money into it before asking me for first time or after I say no in hope she can talk me into it.
I think your wife wants to live in a mansion. You and she don't seem to be on the same page regarding financial issues, long-term financial goals, how to handle money, etc.
Your wife could offer her sister a compromise (if it's true that she's uncomfortable about asking for a refund); she can offer to split the money with her sister. Her sister can keep half and return half. Your wife would just have to chalk it up to an expensive lesson.
From what you've said here, your wife doesn't sound very money-wise. First, pulling money out of a 401k is a bad move (well, in my opinion). But has she ever stopped to consider if you can afford the upkeep of this other house? Not just the mortgage but the taxes, heating, cooling, etc, etc. I am not sure on the legality either (based on what others have said).
Maybe it would be worth it for some marriage counseling (and perhaps some financial counseling... not you telling her, but some third party that could explain all the reasons what she's doing is a bad financial move).
Be careful with the divorce route. She may get your house, and level it out of spite. Reminds me of a divorce case, where a woman was wrongfullygiven custody of her husbands dog, which he has had before he even met her, and had it put down the very next day, before he had a chance to appeal.
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