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Or maybe you could just be yourself. Being the stereotypical anything gets old really quick...and being the good girl trope lasts only until the first tasteless joke opportunity arises.
Being myself seems to be attracting the bad boys though.
Being myself seems to be attracting the bad boys though.
What's classified as the "bad boy" in your opinion? Because...when I think bad boys, I'm thinking guys that use drugs, con people, can't keep a job, have 10 kids by several different women and isn't paying a dime of support for any of them.
I've dated guys covered in tattoos, in punk rock bands, bikers, etc...and none of them were what I'd consider a bad boy. The package is often misleading. The guy with the most tattoos was an investment banker, the bikers were the sweetest and most caring men ever and the guys in the punk rock bands all had pretty awesome day jobs and were looking for a long term relationship that would lead to marriage. Often times, what they do is not what they are.
IME, most women seem to need a relationship more than most men. There are always exceptions, of course.
There are very few women I know that ever say "I'm just gonna do me right now". Even when they do, they're almost immediately on OLD sites actively seeking. I have an ex-female friend who just got out of a crappy relationship about a month ago and she immediately had an OKC profile up after it ended. This, even after she made it seem like she needed a break from relationships.
I'm very independent minded. Having basically built my life up from the ground up entirely by myself, I've become accustom to "just doing me". Though I would cherish a relationship if the right one were to evolve, the relationship does not define who I am as it does a lot of people I know who can't seem to live without one.
I just turned 40 two wks ago, but I still look & feel like a mid to late 20 something...however, definitely mature character-wise (I was mature back when I was actually in my 20s...never did anything crazy, anything I regret, etc.)
I'm not married yet (plan to be engaged probably this year), but I was just thinking, I've never been without a SO since I was 18. You're probably thinking that I must have had tons of SOs back-to-back. Actually, I've only had TWO (yes 2) SOs. I'm just the type who likes commitment & long-lasting relationships & when something works, I like to stick with it. I'm not saying that's good. That's just how things turned out in my life.
When I broke up (mutually) w/ SO #1 (without tears, no depressed period of being in a funk, etc.), I had already met SO #2, so we just started dating right after & have been together ever since.
Anyone else never really been alone/single their entire adult life? I assume my situation's very rare.
My sister is like you. She has never been without a man, although she has had more than two. They were usually relationships (one was a marriage) that lasted at least five years. She is 54 and has been with her current S.O. for fifteen years. She became pregnant in high school with her first boyfriend, who took off when the baby was born, but shortly after she had my niece, she was dating again.
The thing that stymies me is that she is an intolerant, unaffectionate, cranky biotch. I'm outgoing and friendly and I couldn't get a date if I held a gun to a man's head. (I WAS married/in a relationship for sixteen years and briefly dated here and there before and afterward, but got the message and gave up eventually.)
I recently became friends with a woman who met her husband when she was 14. They married when she was 18. After 44 years of marriage, he dumped her for an OLDER woman he met on Facebook. She was a stay-at-home mother and housewife all those years. Living single is a huge adjustment for her at her age. She had never been alone.
IME, most women seem to need a relationship more than most men. There are always exceptions, of course.
There are very few women I know that ever say "I'm just gonna do me right now". Even when they do, they're almost immediately on OLD sites actively seeking. I have an ex-female friend who just got out of a crappy relationship about a month ago and she immediately had an OKC profile up after it ended. This, even after she made it seem like she needed a break from relationships.
I'm very independent minded. Having basically built my life up from the ground up entirely by myself, I've become accustom to "just doing me". Though I would cherish a relationship if the right one were to evolve, the relationship does not define who I am as it does a lot of people I know who can't seem to live without one.
I'm really, really glad that I didn't tie myself down to any one person or lifestyle in my twenties. My thirties were more about putting down roots, so that's when I started to pursue serious relationships. It was a good choice for me.
In terms of women seeming to "need" relationships more than men, I don't know that I agree with that, either, particularly the further along people are in life. Looking at divorce/remarriage statistics alone, men whose marriages end, when they have the option, are quite prone to remarrying. It's not as common for female divorcees to remarry as quickly as their male counterparts, and the ones who don't remarry at all have a higher incidence in females than males. One reason that's been explored for this is that when men marry, they tend to pay less attention to cultivating a support network of friends and loved ones beyond their spouse, and when a marriage ends, they don't have that net to fall back on. They remarry quickly largely so as not to be alone. Women, it's not as common.
My parents were married 66 years before my mother died. Don't see many marriages lasting that long these days, sorry to say.
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