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. Once I was on holiday however, I decided to just have fun with my friend and I didn't get in touch with my guy for a few weeks, and ignored his attempts to contact me. I also got with another guy in a club while I was away, but I haven't told him this.
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Originally Posted by imss_1
Bear in mind he does not know that I 'cheated'.
Quote:
Originally Posted by imss_1
Just wanted to clarify something since I was vague in my first post and worded it wrong. 3 weeks was the total amount of time I was away for. I communicated with him in the first leg of my journey, for around a week. Then I left for a country in Asia which has limited electricity and I did not have a phone. I was here for around 11 days. In this time I did not communicate. Once I was back in the more developed country at the airport, I used the airport wifi to contact him.
Yeah honey....
There is no coming back from this....no need in trying to weasel your way out of it or trying to make your self feel better.
YOU know what YOU did.
You clearly stated you ignored him...despite the communication technical difficulties. If anything they are totally irrelevant. Bottom line is....if you wanted him that bad....you would've did all you could to stay in touch with him. You did not. You were very selfish and self absorbed.
Own up to your "mistakes" and move on. Become a better person.
Location: IN>Germany>ND>OH>TX>CA>Currently NoVa and a Vacation Lake House in PA
3,259 posts, read 4,326,350 times
Reputation: 13471
Quote:
Originally Posted by imss_1
I've been dating this guy for about 4 months, it has been going really well. He treats me great and is really sweet, respectful and affectionate. I have been a little bit frustrated at how things were moving quite slowly - we only saw each other about once a week at best and he was quite slow to respond to my texts, taking up to a day sometimes. However, in person things were really great and right before Xmas he met my parents and then my extended family and got me a lovely Xmas gift (I didn't get him anything).
After Xmas I went on holiday for 3 weeks and before I left, he talked about how he really wanted me to keep in touch while I was out there and how he was going to miss me. He also called me right before I boarded my flight to say bye. Once I was on holiday however, I decided to just have fun with my friend and I didn't get in touch with my guy for a few weeks, and ignored his attempts to contact me. I also got with another guy in a club while I was away, but I haven't told him this.
When I came home last week, I messaged him to say I was back and he seemed a little bit cold, but said work was really busy for him and asked when he was going to see me. We then didn't speak for a couple of days, which is really unusual for us. We made plans for Thursday night, which he then cancelled because he said he got stuck at work. This turned into a fight because I didn't believe him as he made no attempt to reschedule and is now ignoring my texts.
I'm really upset about all this and really want to get back to the way things were before I left. I'm well aware I messed up and probably hurt his feelings but I don't know how to get through to him now. He's very, very sensitive and quite non-confrontational, so I think he will ignore me for a long time now if not forever.
If anyone has any bright ideas about how to fix this, that would be great.
Synopsis, you played passive aggressive with "your guy" while away for three weeks, hooked up with another man at a club during this time, and you now want things back the way they are. If he's smart he has already moved on, and you should be looking at moving on as well.
It didn't sound like you two were on the same page before you left on your vacation, so maybe you two were just not meant to be. I'm not exactly sure why this is such a puzzle to figure out, sounds like you want to keep calling all the shots here and it sounds like you're no longer in a relationship.
If you're now feeling like he is the great guy and you know you blew it, then lesson learn.
"Once I was on holiday however, I decided to just have fun with my friend and I didn't get in touch with my guy for a few weeks, and ignored his attempts to contact me.I also got with another guy in a club while I was away ... "
?
LOL
yep, she changed it because everyone said she was mean! nice catch, I was gonna go back and look as well.
The guy doesn't sound all that into the OP to begin with, I know when I'm into a girl she'll know it, he sounds like he could take her or leave her..... not to be harsh...
I have a feeling that if she let him know that she's meeting other men at night clubs he'd probably bounce.......
That's because when you 'go on holiday' for 3 weeks, you can't expect another human being to act like a machine that has an on/off switch to immediately go back to being into you when you return.
Human beings are not toasters.
If you were really into him, you would plan a 'holiday' with him as opposed to one without him.
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