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Old 02-02-2015, 12:21 PM
 
Location: Pa
42,565 posts, read 42,465,609 times
Reputation: 24873

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Quote:
Originally Posted by FBJ View Post
Why is it wrong to like attention from someone you think is fine? For example it's a older lady at my job I have a crush on but I would never tell her but enjoy the attention she gives me Then it;s another lady who is older but I don't find her attractive and when she flirts with me I get the throw up feeling lol
Lol! You get the throw up feeling?!

 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:23 PM
 
Location: Huntsville, AL
2,850 posts, read 769,827 times
Reputation: 5396
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ashleyga View Post
I'm not quite sure how to handle these types scenarios, but I am quite done giving out my number to old guys that I, quite honestly, find immensely creepy.
Try this the next time that happens:

Smile at that man and ask, "Do you have any daughters?"

If the answer is "No" then, say, "When or if you do, how would you react to her coming home telling you about some man that's easily twice her age, hitting on her?"

If the answer is "Yes" then say, pretty much the same thing with this addition:
Then you ought to be ashamed of yourself being a man nearly twice my age, hitting on me like a school girl. I'd suggest you go talk to that daughter of yours and see if she can hook you up with some of her friends moms..." and walk away knowing you just put that jack***** in his place.

And don't EVER give out your number to someone you don't really know - or feel you may want to know... it's a sick world out there my young friend, don't put yourself in a position that makes you more uncomfortable.
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:24 PM
 
7,022 posts, read 5,778,848 times
Reputation: 6963
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ashleyga View Post
So I went to a Starbucks a few hours ago and there was this older man (Mid 40's maybe?) in the line behind me. I accidentally bumped into him as I was grabbing my coffee, and I was pretty mortified because my coffee spilled all over, so I just kept apologizing to him. He was very gracious despite having hot coffee all over his shoes. As the barista was making me another, the guy started making small talk with me. He asked me how old I was, if I went to the local university (it's a college town) and what I majored in and so on, so forth. Very generic questions. When I went to grab my coffee again, he quickly pulled out his phone and asked for my number.

I was, like, beyond shocked.

I mean, I didn't feel like I was giving off a flirtatious vibe at all. I'm 18, I've gone on dates and had boyfriends, so I know when I'm flirting. I didn't quite realize he was, either. I was especially shocked because he knew I was 18 and he was well beyond those years. I just awkwardly smiled and gave him my number, which was a big mistake, but I honestly did not know how to respond. I'm no good with rejecting guys, especially older ones' that remind me of my father.

Thing is, this isn't the first time an older gentleman has hit on me. More often, older men do than guys my age. I'm pretty sure I look my age, too. If anything, I've been told I look significantly younger than 18. So I'm at a complete loss as to why this keeps happening to me. I'm a very non confrontational person, I don't like conflict and I especially don't like being put on the spot.

Obviously, I regret giving out my number to someone I am definitely not interested in. But I don't know how to politely tell someone they're too old for my tastes, either. I mean, do I just flat out say, "No, you can't have it"? or "Heh, I'm 18 remember?"

I'm not quite sure how to handle these types scenarios, but I am quite done giving out my number to old guys that I, quite honestly, find immensely creepy.
Creepy older guys hitting on younger women is nothing new. You better come up with a way to fend them off because it's going to get worse when you go to college. Simply smile and say "I don't give out my number to strangers" or "I already have a boyfriend but thanks for the compliment!"

The fact that you're inexperienced and overly nice is something they take advantage of. You're not being rude, blunt, or a b*tch by telling them nicely that you're not interested. You don't owe them anything. Remember that and good luck!
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:25 PM
 
214 posts, read 195,935 times
Reputation: 195
Quote:
Originally Posted by FBJ View Post
Why is it wrong to like attention from someone you think is fine? For example it's a older lady at my job I have a crush on but I would never tell her but enjoy the attention she gives me Then it;s another lady who is older but I don't find her attractive and when she flirts with me I get the throw up feeling lol
There are thousands, if not millions, of young women OP's age who drool over actors whom are in their 40's-50's. OP is maybe not one of those women, but there are many out there who do. I know a few girls/young women in their teens and early 20's who fawn over the likes of Bradley Cooper and the like, and if given the chance would happily sleep with any one of them.
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:29 PM
 
Location: Huntsville, AL
2,850 posts, read 769,827 times
Reputation: 5396
Quote:
Originally Posted by krazykatlady View Post
Next time just give a fake number. Easy peasy.............
Or find and memorize the number for the Pedophile Association... and give that to him. When he calls, he'll get the idea...
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:31 PM
 
Location: Minneapolis
2,533 posts, read 2,386,768 times
Reputation: 4239
Quote:
Originally Posted by Tumf View Post
Or find and memorize the number for the Pedophile Association... and give that to him. When he calls, he'll get the idea...
Unless the OP--who is eighteen years old--has not yet entered puberty, this discussion has absolutely nothing to do with pedophilia.
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:37 PM
 
2,270 posts, read 2,218,741 times
Reputation: 2637
Quote:
Originally Posted by UsAll View Post
To the OP:

Tell him you're a lesbian. That should make him back off (or at least I think it would).
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jenna1343 View Post
Or immediately incite his fantasies to the point where he thinks he could be the third party.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77 View Post
Or a lesbian that likes old ladies. (That will scare him)

Last week, I found out that my inflatable doll was a lesbian. Bummer.
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:44 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
39,183 posts, read 37,806,900 times
Reputation: 73950
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chowhound View Post
I think depending on the situation and if the guy isn't being rude or creepy, I would think a little white lie like saying "No thanks, I have a BF" is a nice little way to let the guy down easy and give him some excuse in his mind that it wasn't him, it's just that she wasn't available.

Of course a woman has every right to simply say no thanks, but again, if the guy isn't being a pill, why not throw him a bone.... I know if the situation was reversed I'd make an effort to be congenial.

Hmmm ... "Let the guy down easy."

"Give him some excuse???" They are strangers. She has no interest on him. There is literally nothing binding them together and nothing that would put her in a position of owing him anything.

I really don't get the aversion to a simple no. If delivered with a nice smile, it works and makes no presumptions about the emotional state of the man who's asking.
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:57 PM
 
Location: So Cal
38,783 posts, read 37,977,338 times
Reputation: 39642
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wmsn4Life View Post
Hmmm ... "Let the guy down easy."

"Give him some excuse???" They are strangers. She has no interest on him. There is literally nothing binding them together and nothing that would put her in a position of owing him anything.

I really don't get the aversion to a simple no. If delivered with a nice smile, it works and makes no presumptions about the emotional state of the man who's asking.
I think I covered that in my post... you quoted me but I guess you didn't read it... LOL, I'm not even being snarky... like I posted of course she doesn't owe him and she has every right to say no, she doesn't even have to be friendly and smile, but all I meant was if the guys wasn't being creepy, I don't see a reason why not say a little white lie... and obviously she doesn't owe him that...

I just find sometimes being friendly and polite and a little white lie makes society run a little smoother....

I'm not sure how many more disclaimers I could put here...

Once again she can simply say no... and of course she is perfectly in her right to not even give him a smile.

Just saying....


Last edited by Chowhound; 02-02-2015 at 01:09 PM..
 
Old 02-02-2015, 12:59 PM
FBJ
 
Location: Tall Building down by the river
39,615 posts, read 48,455,466 times
Reputation: 9451
Quote:
Originally Posted by Raena77 View Post
Lol! You get the throw up feeling?!
When I get attention from older unattractive women I get ill
lol
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