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I am sorry that you are in that situation. I personally like more built guys, athletes. From what I understand you need to gain some confidence. That is the biggest turn on in a guy no matter what type of woman you like. I would work on that and I think that everything else will fall in place.
Location: Subconscious Syncope, USA (Northeastern US)
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There are a lot of variables here. Depending on your age, as an example, you might not have filled out fully yet, and so on.
Depends on you and the woman in question too. Does something else - like your wit, charm, sensitivity, and intelligence - make up for the lack of brawny exterior muscle?
I personally go for the regular guy type, that can pick me up, throw me over his shoulder, and carry me off somewhere. That's what I married anyway, and I dont regret a thing - but thats not for every woman either. He happened to have a brilliant mind and great sense of humor too. <3
That said, I know of at least one woman that goes for 'computer geeks'. She seeks them out. In fact, she would lie with you tonight if you could teach her something she doesnt already know about computers, lol.
As others have mentioned, you have to be somewhat realistic about what you find attractive too. In short, if the muscle between your ears makes up for anything else you might be lacking, you have just as good of a shot as anyone else does.
Looks will only carry anyone so far - there has to be something of substance inside them as well.
Every woman wants to be swept off her feet every now and then. Should I scoop him out and throw him on the bed?
Not to mention that most of us like to feel protected. In a conflictual issue, would I be supposed to save his ass as well?
except that there is little correlation between body size and ability to protect you. A 130 pound pro mma fighter can take out untrained men of any size. then weapons come into play in most defense situations which makes size even less relevant
-You are play wrestling and you realize that you could totally kick his butt, if you wanted to.
-You decide to arm wrestle and you easily win every time.
-You guys are moving boxes or furniture and he can't keep up with you or lift nearly as much as you can.
-You're walking together in a sketchy part of the city after a show and realize that you would be much more
effective at self defense if the need arose than he would.
I'm pretty much THAT guy, I'm skinny, small framed and it's difficult for me to gain strength or muscle.
My default body type seems to be "computer geek". Most average women in decent shape are stronger than
I am and likely tougher since I've never been in a fight.
I've done the attempts at bulking up and working out too. With my body type and genes it would basically
be a 24/7 lifestyle to attain and maintain and I've got to much else going on that it isn't reasonable.
I've been in a few relationships and it's come out in subtle and no so subtle ways that it's an issue.
Wondering what women think about this. Do you care? Is it a deal breaker? Do you need your man to be stronger/tougher than you are or is that just a sexist stereotype?
It would not matter to me, but if that REALLY matters SO MUCH to you, you should know that regardless of strength, size, or previous training, anyone can learn several effective self-defense techniques, how to fight back effectively - yes, it's possible even against someone bigger or stronger than you.
No matter your size, weight, or strength in relation to your opponent, you can defend yourself by strategically using your body and the simple law of physics. This is the principle behind martial arts systems like Jujitsu and other self-defense programs where a smaller person is able to defeat a larger one
There are many very effective video tutorials online.
Or take a self-defense class AND practice with your SO. NCASA self-defense guidelines C.O.B.R.A.
I don't know your lifestyle, but how often you expect to be in a fight? Instead of worrying about it,
you should learn how to avoid confrontation, or how to defuse a situation. Nothing you own is worth more than your life or health.
Also, even the strongest man could be pretty helpless when facing a knife or gun...
I do wish sometimes that my metabolism burned everything I threw at it, but I can't relate to not being pretty thick and strong. I do know guys that are naturally really skinny and they all have found women that like them. In my observation it's usually the really progressive girls.
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