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Old 02-17-2015, 08:42 AM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,157 posts, read 13,935,390 times
Reputation: 14935

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There are a few things you can do.

First, and likely the most prudent, is seek the advice of others in the group before you do anything. If they see the way she treats you and if you're worried about things being awkward after you break up or having to find new friends, take a straw poll amongst the group and see if they can weigh in with some sound advice.

Or you could do as one poster suggested and convey your disapproval publicly to other members of the group. This will likely lead to confrontation between you and her later in the evening when you are no longer with the group, but if you're tired of the way she treats you it just may be time to sack up and deal with it.

Another option is to go full-sophomoric on her and stoop to her level. I normally don't recommend this sort of behavior, but since you said you can also be very sarcastic yourself it is possible you've already done this without fully realizing it. If not, perhaps turning her little game on her in front of the group in a "I'm joking but not really" sort of way may be a good way to get her attention. More likely, it'll result in escalation, so if you go this route you'd better be ready for the long war.

Finally there is the nuclear option. I break this option into two contingencies: nuclear light, which is a breakup quietly between yourselves and nuclear holocaust, which is a "THAT'S IT!" moment where you snap while with the group and tell her in front of everyone you are through. Of course, if you are going to go this route you should weigh it carefully and only after discussing it with others in the group. Maybe a publicly humiliating experience like that would induce a change in her long term behavioral patterns and help you salvage a little self respect.

Whatever you do, don't do anything until you self-assess and make sure you're not part of the problem too. It's rare that it's completely one-sided, so make sure you are doing all you can do to not be part of the problem yourself.
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Old 02-22-2015, 11:36 AM
 
Location: West Hollywood
3,190 posts, read 3,167,360 times
Reputation: 5262
The girlfriend has been on her best behavior since I talked to her about this again. Fingers crossed.
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Old 02-22-2015, 01:09 PM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,157 posts, read 13,935,390 times
Reputation: 14935
Quote:
Originally Posted by MordinSolus View Post
The girlfriend has been on her best behavior since I talked to her about this again. Fingers crossed.
That's good news. Hope it works out for you, OP!
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Old 02-22-2015, 04:03 PM
 
Location: Near L.A.
4,108 posts, read 10,758,298 times
Reputation: 3444
Enjoy the sex for now, then kick her to the curb when she starts this crap again. Because she WILL at some point.
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Old 02-24-2015, 11:42 PM
 
Location: West Hollywood
3,190 posts, read 3,167,360 times
Reputation: 5262
I just went ahead and ended the relationship tonight after some other stuff came to light. Turns out jerks are jerks. I'll deal with the fallout as it comes. Life's too short to put up with BS from people who don't care about you.
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Old 02-24-2015, 11:58 PM
 
Location: Oklahoma
535 posts, read 513,027 times
Reputation: 482
Quote:
Originally Posted by MordinSolus View Post
I just went ahead and ended the relationship tonight after some other stuff came to light. Turns out jerks are jerks. I'll deal with the fallout as it comes. Life's too short to put up with BS from people who don't care about you.
good for you.

(i wasn't able to rep)
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Old 02-25-2015, 12:06 AM
 
Location: State of Transition
102,066 posts, read 107,036,480 times
Reputation: 115868
It sounds like your friends aren't going to be her friends for long. They're not happy with her behavior, either. If you stay with her, you'll only end up looking like a fool. Your friends will be wondering why you're with her. So dump her, and let the social situation with the mutual friends work itself out. Your friends will respect you for that. If they don't, they're not worth much as friends, anyway.
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Old 02-25-2015, 09:15 AM
 
Location: Virginia Beach, VA
11,157 posts, read 13,935,390 times
Reputation: 14935
Good for you, OP. Sounds like you made the right decision and for the right reason. Best wishes moving forward.
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