Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
Any woman who feels the need to start talking about her church right away gets the grade of vomit-chunks from me. Also, any woman who chooses to go back to work when her child is 8 weeks old (and her husband makes 100K) and refers to it constantly as "school" gets an F. 8 week old babies don't go to school, sorry! So glad you make a lot of money, so why did you choose to have kids if your money was more important? I have a hard time with women who have kids and farm out their raising because they are raking in the money.
I gave up a career for a few years to stay home with mine while they are little, and I know that in 25 years I will be so happy that I did. I wonder what the money-lovers will think. I wonder how their kids will feel about them. Yes, a man can stay home too if the wife makes more. A real parent should be with the kids whenever possible.
With women it is hard, I like natural women who talk about nature and wear little makeup. The money-hungry ones scare me to death. Any one who values owning a Lexus over spending time with their little kids is to be avoided at all costs.
Well I just talked about kids. Oh well. They are our future. I would never wear plastic fingernails or give a s*&% about designer clothing or buy a car for any reason other than functionality.
yes, and the young career women who I work with put them in very prestigious pre schools, and pay through the nose, just for the recognition of saying, my children go to so and so....sad, very sad. I worked with one woman who had a very sick child...and 2 other children, her hubby made all kinds of money and she traveled all the time...they had a nanny????? And that million dollar mini mansion but the children did not have their parents....and when those parents get older and the kids get married, they are going to be very lonely with all their material "things" sitting around them.
A lot of these posts lend credence to the many times I've had women (mostly single at the time) tell me "I have more men friends than women friends".
yes, indeed they do, and as I was the same...but, I figured at the time, people are people, you can't change them...so I moved on... and glad of it...some women can be very mentally draining.
yes, indeed they do, and as I was the same...but, I figured at the time, people are people, you can't change them...so I moved on... and glad of it...some women can be very mentally draining.
Yesterday afternoon, my boyfriend was at the RMV and overheard a cellphone conversation by a young lady that was discussing both her 9-11 theories and her Puerto Rican-Armenian heritage. Her attitude just came across as shallow and what she said made no sense to him. Then as she got up to the teller window she gave her address and instead of saying Massachusetts she substituted M@sshole. She was like the Massachusetts version of a valley girl and she thought very highly of herself. My boyfriend found that girl very irritating.
Things that can put me off from wanting to be friends with a woman... if she likes to talk about her babies and kids, if she drives an SUV, if she is wearing too much pink clothing, too much makeup, long fingernails, her eyebrows are only pencil lines, if she is very religious or if she is too attached to her cell phone and is texting or yakking away on it.
Wow, you must have met my former coworkers. One had a magazine one day and showed the other one and said, "See this woman? I want to make myself into her and look just like her."
I wondered how one could make oneself look like someone airbrushed.
The conversations were always "I" and "Me".
Their husbands and their kids are like some more material things in their lives, and they try to project this perfect life. When you know underneath it all, it is quicksand.
Any woman who feels the need to start talking about her church right away gets the grade of vomit-chunks from me. Also, any woman who chooses to go back to work when her child is 8 weeks old (and her husband makes 100K) and refers to it constantly as "school" gets an F. 8 week old babies don't go to school, sorry! So glad you make a lot of money, so why did you choose to have kids if your money was more important? I have a hard time with women who have kids and farm out their raising because they are raking in the money.
I gave up a career for a few years to stay home with mine while they are little, and I know that in 25 years I will be so happy that I did. I wonder what the money-lovers will think. I wonder how their kids will feel about them. Yes, a man can stay home too if the wife makes more. A real parent should be with the kids whenever possible.
With women it is hard, I like natural women who talk about nature and wear little makeup. The money-hungry ones scare me to death. Any one who values owning a Lexus over spending time with their little kids is to be avoided at all costs.
Well I just talked about kids. Oh well. They are our future. I would never wear plastic fingernails or give a s*&% about designer clothing or buy a car for any reason other than functionality.
I am very much like you and did similar with raising my kids. I remember one mother asking me to watch her sons in the morning before they went to school because she couldn't find daycare for them at that age. I asked what time, and she said "5:00am" and I said, no. Imagine being a kid and being dropped off at someone else's home that early, when they are all getting ready for school or work. The mother drove a Mercedes, so the message is the car and the money are more important than your comfort, kid.
Those are always the ones who say they HAVE to work. They don't know what it is to have to work. The most they'd give up by not working is that second trip to Cozumel that year.
I had neighbors I couldn't talk to, because they spewed over about themselves, their kids, their wallpaper borders, blah blah. I found them totally airhead boring. I wanted to ask one once, if her husband used a crop on her, and if she said no, it might be a good idea.
Any woman who feels the need to start talking about her church right away gets the grade of vomit-chunks from me. Also, any woman who chooses to go back to work when her child is 8 weeks old (and her husband makes 100K) and refers to it constantly as "school" gets an F. 8 week old babies don't go to school, sorry! So glad you make a lot of money, so why did you choose to have kids if your money was more important? I have a hard time with women who have kids and farm out their raising because they are raking in the money.
I gave up a career for a few years to stay home with mine while they are little, and I know that in 25 years I will be so happy that I did. I wonder what the money-lovers will think. I wonder how their kids will feel about them. Yes, a man can stay home too if the wife makes more. A real parent should be with the kids whenever possible.
With women it is hard, I like natural women who talk about nature and wear little makeup. The money-hungry ones scare me to death. Any one who values owning a Lexus over spending time with their little kids is to be avoided at all costs.
Well I just talked about kids. Oh well. They are our future. I would never wear plastic fingernails or give a s*&% about designer clothing or buy a car for any reason other than functionality.
Yes, there was a time when I was feeling high and mighty and was thinking I should be driving a Lexus. Then my (forgive me everyone) dog came down with cancer and couldn't be treated. As I was driving him around in his last hour before his "appointment", I thought "wow, how did I get it all wrong? how did I get so far off course?"
This is for the ladies. When you meet another woman, what are some of the things that run through your mind/that you consciously or subconsciously judge her on? For instance, her demeanor, her appearance, her weight, her style of dress, her marriage status, etc. What are some women that stand out in your mind that you had some specific first impressions about, good or bad? Are there any dealbreakers for you that would make you decide not to be friends with a woman just because of something you notice on a first impression?
For instance, let's say you're a large woman who is self-conscious about your weight and you meet a really thin woman at a social event. What would run through your mind? Would you still be interested in getting to know her, or would your self-consciousness get in the way?
Or let's say you're not very good with fashion and have let yourself go and meet a very stylish and well-put together woman? Would you feel threatened by that or would you be open to getting to know her?
I'm a slightly larger woman (average by American standards, though ), and actually used to be very heavy... and I have lots of thin friends, so that's not an issue for me - as long as they're not rude about my weight, of course. And if a skinny girl pulls that "I'm sooooo fat" crap, I'd probably not want to be friends with her.
Honestly, I try not to judge other women, but it's impossible not to occasionally... what usually gets my attention in a negative way is how they dress, since that says a lot about a woman. I don't care how stylish or fancy they are, but slutty outfits do make me roll my eyes. However, if said slutty dresser turned out to be super cool, I'd drop my first impression and give them a chance. Same goes for anything else, since I'm not one to judge immediately & stick with it. Mostly I concentrate on their attitude, and try to avoid using their appearance against them... if you have a nasty or moronic personality, then you probably wouldn't be someone I'd bother getting to know.
Quote:
Have you ever unfairly stereotyped a woman you just met only to have that stereotype either confirmed or not confirmed once you got to know her a little better?
Yup, and that's why I've learned not to judge too quickly! I once met a girl who was a stripper, and dressed like one, but she ended up being a good friend of mine (eventually "dumped" her though, due to her being annoying & whiny). Also met a girl once who was just weird looking, and turned me off for no reason in particular... but she came back to my house the next day, asked me out for coffee, and we're still GREAT friends 12 years later. So while I do occasionally judge women on a first impression, I'm always willing to give them a chance based on personality.
Quote:
What are some qualities/characteristics about another woman that would make you feel threatened or insecure based on your own psychological hang-ups?
Well, when I was really overweight, I'd sometimes feel threatened around skinny girls... but since my sister is naturally very thin (she has my mom's figure, I have my dad's), I've always tried not to judge that. Aside from that, I'm pretty secure with myself, so there's not much else I could be threatened by - except maybe girls with beautiful curls, since mine are always frizzy, but I'll just ask them for styling tips.
I believe the older we get, the less interested we are with stero typing and more so, concern ourselves with the internal aspects of humans. We also grow more confident with who we are, and don't really care about what others think any longer...it's an age thing... I dunno, I saw pictures?
But the bottom line is...who really cares what one looks like or how they dress, as long as they're clean, not a criminal, and respect the rights of others...and are not a member of any special interest group...I just stuck that part in to make it interesting...lol
Seriously, though, who cares....what we need to do is stand back and look at the big picture...us...what we've done to contribute to our families...our neighborhoods, our schools, which will run a ripple effect. We need to care about each other more....
with me, it's her smile, if you can see a genuine light in her eyes...meaning she is caring and considers the hearts of others....her demeaner is very important, if she's postive, does she ask me questions about me, and really listen (and you can tell if she's listening and is genuinely interested) are the questions she is asking about hobbies, movies, likes and dislikes, or is she asking me very personal questions; and I will tell anyone, including co-workers, who ask personal questions, that what she is asking is very personal and at this point in time, I'd rather keep it simple and discuss general topics.
I never feel threatened when I meet someone, as new people are exciting and interesting (as people enjoy talking about themselves, their beliefs, their life, their adventures)
I've worked in the Corporate World for years, and have had an education, to say the least, but, still, there are always those congenial true souls that you meet, which I've described above, who possess charism and intelligence.
If the woman comes off aloof, I'm not interested...if she gives me the once over from head to toe, she is judging me on my clothes, but I will still venture into a friendship, due to being curious...until she becomes rude or condiscending..then any excuse to walk away will be my first thought.
I've made some positively awesome women friends who are basically interesting, caring and intellectual and wise from life experiences...and, with women, I don't know how to explain this, but there is a very intimate, mental bond, that is loving, caring and basically rewarding from women who I've clicked with. You just seem to hit it off, yanno? One of my best friends is an author, and we met, b/c I gave a review on one of her books...she and I meet for lunch at least 3 times a month. I love her laugh...her sense of humor....
Actually, since I've been little, I've been a loner, and I've been told, that threatens women, as they think I'm being evasive or a snob. But, I'm used to being alone with my thoughts, I loath shopping, soap operas and gossip and really hate to get into the politics of others, friends, family, work, etc.
Women I dislike are users, women who snitch or carry gossip....women who flaunt themselves in front of married men....who are so needy, they have no time for giving compassion, just taking it....or women who are so insecure, they need to pound others down to feel good about themselves. Women who believe, that clothes or material things, are a sign of success....or who brag about their career to the point that they project a character that thinks the job couldn't run without her, or women who are just down right mean to others. Yuck....and I'm not a click person...I won't sell my soul to be liked...you either do or don't, we can't like everyone and everyone cannot like us....but it doesn't upset me if they don't.
Women are a pillar of society...some are so diverse and have given so much to the success of mankind....some are really dedicated housewifes and mothers...some are super career women who can multi task both family and career, and some are just down right artistically inclined, great friends and super people.
great post, creme. It would be nice if people were as insightful.
For me- I look at honesty and personlaity. i dont give a sh--- about materia lthings anymore- actually someone who is a narcissist- I head for the hills. Would rather be alone.
great post, creme. It would be nice if people were as insightful.
For me- I look at honesty and personlaity. i dont give a sh--- about materia lthings anymore- actually someone who is a narcissist- I head for the hills. Would rather be alone.
you go girl....it beats the heck outa me? Who cares...yanno....
I don't really care who you were or what you did, what I care is, how you treat me now.
Love ya
Creme
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.
Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
And that million dollar mini mansion but the children did not have their parents....and when those parents get older and the kids get married, they are going to be very lonely with all their material "things" sitting around them.
Materialistic women
), and actually used to be very heavy... and I have lots of thin friends, so that's not an issue for me - as long as they're not rude about my weight, of course. And if a skinny girl pulls that "I'm sooooo fat" crap, I'd probably not want to be friends with her. 
So while I do occasionally judge women on a first impression, I'm always willing to give them a chance based on personality.
