Would you be devastated by this? (dating, marriage, women, husband)

[Jadel812]

Twins divorced after discovering that they are actually brothers and sisters. Please read the story and comment on your feelings on the pending new rulings.

Twins Split Up At Birth, United In Marriage - Family News Story - WFTV Orlando (http://www.wftv.com/family/15032271/detail.html - broken link)

[madicarus2000]

Originally Posted by Jadel812

Twins divorced after discovering that they are actually brothers and sisters. Please read the story and comment on your feelings on the pending new rulings.

I may be misquoting but I thought the old saying goes, "a family that lays together stays together".

How about, they are the rare siblings that have make up "es ee ex" after a fight.

Or how about the husband whining to their mom "mommy, she said she faked it all the time, that's not fair!!!"

This is too bizarre and rare to occur for me to take it seriously.

[cremebrulee]

ahhh, can't imagine what those poor souls went thru, the shock, horror, grief...

I'm devestated for them....

yes, you should know who you are and who your parents are...but then, I suppose, this would really harm the adoptive parents....I suppose, if there are twins, or brothers and sisters that become seperated, then yes, they should know upon the time they turn 18 years of age....but I also believe the adoptive parents also have an obligation to tell them...

I'm interested to read response from others.

Thank you, very interesting, although very sad.

Creme

[Twinkle Toes]

My parents swear I'm not, but I still think I'm adopted! Hope my husband isn't my brother!!! Ewwww!

[Jadel812]

God for your sake I hope not.....just the thought of sleeping with my brother is enough to cause complete loss of appetite.

[KwaK]

If you think about it this could happen more often than folks realize.
Take for example the sperm donor clinics, women chose the donor based on a biography. If there should be a "popular" donor, who is to say that the chances of many women that could chose him live in the same area. Which would increase the chances that their children would possibly go to school or grow up together. This would put a higher chance that relationships could happen.
Especially if they were not aware of how they were conceived.

[Lindsey_Mcfarren]

I am frankly taken aback that its not against policy to seperate twins at birth in the UK. From what I understand here in the states it is now against policy.

I think adoptees have the right to have more information about themselves. I am adopted and found it frustrating that nothing was in place to give me the information I wanted. In some states and adoptions through agencies they have a process in place where the Mother is contacted and asked if its ok to give information and if so what information. This was not the case with me. I had to get a court order to open my adoption records and hunt her down myself. All the while not knowing what her response would be.

In an adoption, it seems like the rights of everyone else are considered BEFORE the rights of the child.

[cremebrulee]

Originally Posted by Lindsey_Mcfarren

I am frankly taken aback that its not against policy to seperate twins at birth in the UK. From what I understand here in the states it is now against policy.

I think adoptees have the right to have more information about themselves. I am adopted and found it frustrating that nothing was in place to give me the information I wanted. In some states and adoptions through agencies they have a process in place where the Mother is contacted and asked if its ok to give information and if so what information. This was not the case with me. I had to get a court order to open my adoption records and hunt her down myself. All the while not knowing what her response would be.

In an adoption, it seems like the rights of everyone else are considered BEFORE the rights of the child.

Let me tell you, the child welfare systems here in the U.S. for the most part are really dysfunctional. All they care about is getting the kids into a home and fed and go onto the next one. They don't have nearly enough staff and the funding is a joke. Not to mention, the staff members are underpaid, resulting in shoddy decissions made for the children.

I was a foster mother for awhile....never ever again...those people were less then professional. And I'm certain they are not all like that, but the woman running the show was unable to cope and simply didn't care.

[Roselvr]

Originally Posted by Karla with a K

If you think about it this could happen more often than folks realize.
Take for example the sperm donor clinics, women chose the donor based on a biography. If there should be a "popular" donor, who is to say that the chances of many women that could chose him live in the same area. Which would increase the chances that their children would possibly go to school or grow up together. This would put a higher chance that relationships could happen.
Especially if they were not aware of how they were conceived.

Take me for example..

When I was in my 30's, I found out my mother gave up a baby boy in the late 50's.. he is a few years older then me, yet 2 years younger then my husband. We ended up finding him.. he lived a few towns away from us. He even drove by where I worked, knew who I was, so to speak from seeing me out pumping gas. He didn't know I was actually related to him. What if he would have stopped in for gas, we built up a relationship, started dating? Yuck. This story very well could have been us. The things that went through my head after I found out I had a brother.. thinking of the guys I dated.. thinking back to their features, did they look like me or my mother? Horrible. Talk about nightmares.

How many other people in their 40's even 50's have a sib out there that they don't know about? My parents never talked about it. I can't remember how I even found out, but I'm surprised I didn't find out sooner as his birth certificate & baby photos were in the living room in a piece of furniture.

I don't know what the answer is, especially these days with IVF, anon donations, not only of sperm but eggs as well. Maybe people that want to marry need to start getting DNA tests?

[AnyDayNow]

I haven't read the replies yet, but this has been on my mind since I read the article on-line yesterday. The twins were supposedly the result of IVF--which is a lot of trouble for a woman to go to in order to get pg, even if the expense factor were removed. So why were the twins given up for adoption? Why would someone have IVF done and not keep one of the babies?