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I guess I feel like she thinks of us as more than good friends. I don't think she would be doing the things she would with me unless she's a b$#$*...
Hmm
This is how you talk about someone who you want to be your gf? Why would you want a b$#$* for a gf? Why the attitude? Do you have issues with women? It's starting to sound like she'd be better off without you, and your hidden attitudes. Or does this mean something different to you than it does to us? Please translate.
What's difference between eating together in nice dinner and a date? I've had multiple dinners with her but never 'official'
Sorry, I'm trying to get caught up on all these pages of posts. So you've been paying for her dinners, you two haven't been splitting the bill? You're right, that's a date signal. The only problem is that unless you make it clear you're dating, you can't be 100% sure she sees it that way, even if you've been paying for everything. There's a slight grey area there. But if you feel confident in asking her to be your gf, go for it. Good luck. Get back to us.
What's difference between eating together in nice dinner and a date?'
Understanding and intention, Or in your case understanding OF intention.
You have niether of these in your circumstance or you wouldn't be asking the question in the opening post. Until you have clearified what you are and where you would like to go knock off the funny business. It's only going to serve to hurt you and your "friendship" in the event the feelings are not reciprocal
As it is now the friendship is already damaged if the feelings are not going two ways. You can't go backwards from here.
If lover is your intention for seeking her attention and affection let it be know and stop pretending it's all about "friendship"
You're past friendship right now and whafting in between because nobody will speak up to confirm with the other what is really going on.
This is how you talk about someone who you want to be your gf? Why would you want a b$#$* for a gf? Why the attitude? Do you have issues with women? It's starting to sound like she'd be better off without you, and your hidden attitudes. Or does this mean something different to you than it does to us? Please translate.
I think I mean more by "sluts" - u know those girls that just sleep with everyone. I'm not saying she's that, cause I don't think of that of her at all.
Sorry, I'm trying to get caught up on all these pages of posts. So you've been paying for her dinners, you two haven't been splitting the bill? You're right, that's a date signal. The only problem is that unless you make it clear you're dating, you can't be 100% sure she sees it that way, even if you've been paying for everything. There's a slight grey area there. But if you feel confident in asking her to be your gf, go for it. Good luck. Get back to us.
I've been friends with this girl for maybe 6 months now, and we talk a lot, almost everyday. She initiates a lot back then, before I started liking her. She talks to me on all sorts of social media, Facebook, snapchat, gchat, email, etc.. u name it. I started liking her a few months ago. I've stayed over at her place a few times in same bed, but we never did anything. Lately, (past month or so), she lays really close to me when I stay over after drinking). Past couple weeks or so I've been sleeping over at her place or vice versa, but haven't kissed or anything. We've been slowly getting closer.. I started holding her hands, play with her hair, spooning her etc...
I've never really asked her out on an official date or anything. We hang out alone sometimes like studying and dinner etc..., but nothing was "date".
How do I move on from here... Have the where this is going talk? Ask her to be my girlfriend? etc..
Also to note, it wasn't until past couple weeks that I was getting sure she likes me. I always thought she was friendly to me, but when I started holding hands in bed, I became sure she's interested. We haven't done anything public or anything.
What to do?
Stopped reading right there
Don't waste your time, and learn from your mistakes. You have established yourself as doormat beta-male.
Men and women can't be friends because men can't be friends with women. She thinks you're her friend now because that's what chicks do. They confuse guys that lack the spine to make a move as genuine friends. I'm sorry to say, but unless you strike the lotto or become a rock star, you're pretty much stuck in the friend zone.
Women will read this and get furious, as they truly don't believe it. They'll say things like " my friend of blah blah blah years has never even attempted hit on me, so he's obviously my friend." Guys that aren't painfully bad with women will read this and nod there heads as they know it's absolutely true. Unfortunately, it only takes a few white knights to justify their inability to bag chicks by saying that they are friends with women to perpetuate the lie and reassure confused women that their guy friends are really just their friends and not romantically challenged beta males or guys that are using them for some reason.
The question is..do I ask her out on a date or ask her to be in a relationship.
Feels awkward asking her to go on a date it seem like we've hang out alone unofficial dates.. paying for her dinner buying her stuff etc.
And it wouldn't feel awkward asking her to be in a relationship when you haven't even kissed her? What if she says yes because you led her to believe it would be a platonic "relationship"?
They shouldn't be in bed together, shouldn't be having sleepovers, all under this odd term of "hanging out".
It's no wonder so many are having trouble navigating the dating world! There is too much ambiguity with hanging out rather than dating intentionally. If you're not in a relationship with someone, you shouldn't be sharing their bed, not snuggling and cuddling as "friends". Stop trying to reap the benefits of relationships while being too wimpy to stand up and declare your intentions and actually ask someone on a date or to be in a relationship with you instead of playing around.
^^^^ I agree.
Friends do not sleep in bed together.
Friends do not cuddle.
Friends do not snuggle.
Men and women...
Stop playing around.
Figure out exactly what you want and go from there.
Be honest with your intentions.
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