U.S. CitiesCity-Data Forum Index
Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
 [Register]
Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. After you create your account, you'll be able to customize options and access all our 15,000 new posts/day with fewer ads.
View detailed profile (Advanced) or search
site with Google Custom Search

Search Forums  (Advanced)
Reply Start New Thread
 
Old 03-14-2015, 01:41 PM
 
290 posts, read 449,235 times
Reputation: 129

Advertisements

My bf and I are getting married soon. Last night my bf told his mom that he is marrying me soon. His dad was happy but his mom got upset.

He helps his parents financially. I told him he can still help them. Please advice. Thanks.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message

 
Old 03-14-2015, 01:51 PM
 
6,319 posts, read 5,717,541 times
Reputation: 11933
This seems like one of those "leave it and see" problems.

Not really much you can do except hope that time and grandchildren will change her mind.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 01:56 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,188 posts, read 21,000,505 times
Reputation: 22134
What exactly was she upset about?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 02:53 PM
 
290 posts, read 449,235 times
Reputation: 129
Quote:
Originally Posted by Dewdroplet76 View Post
What exactly was she upset about?
Idk. My bf just said that shes upset when he told her that he's getting married. That he wont be able to help them as much because he wants to save up for my bf and I to buy a house together.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 03:00 PM
 
6,319 posts, read 5,717,541 times
Reputation: 11933
Perhaps make sure there actually is a problem, THEN start a thread....?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 03:08 PM
 
Location: The New England part of Ohio
18,659 posts, read 23,235,665 times
Reputation: 48824
Somehow, I do not think money is at the heart of the problem.

There is a problem. "Getting upset" is not a normal reaction to news of an engagement.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 03:13 PM
 
Location: Katonah, NY
21,188 posts, read 21,000,505 times
Reputation: 22134
Quote:
Originally Posted by Missganda View Post
Idk. My bf just said that shes upset when he told her that he's getting married. That he wont be able to help them as much because he wants to save up for my bf and I to buy a house together.
How does your boyfriend feel about this?
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 03:41 PM
 
1,178 posts, read 965,602 times
Reputation: 2209
This is a problem.
You should ask him if his mom's getting upset has any influence on the two of you getting married and his plans to still cut back helping them financially so you both can buy a house.
I will share something which recently happened.....
a woman I know and her husband got a divorce. The husband is my nephew. Well, when they were married they helped his mother and father in law financially on a monthly basis for years. After the divorce, however, that stopped. The ex-wife, who wanted the divorce, was no longer able to help them when she was on her own. So because of that, her own parents have nothing to do with her. They are still speaking and on good terms with their daughter's ex. But because they blame their daughter for divorcing him which led to them not receiving anymore financial assistance, they treat her like this.

I know this is not what is going on with you exactly. I just wanted to let you know that if the mother and father can cut off their own daughter because of being financially dependent on them, there may really be an issue once the two of you get married and they are not being helped as much by their son. Money does strange things to people.

Just something to be aware of. Not trying to scare you. When two people who are in love want to get married and share it with their parents, there is an expectation that the joy and happiness they feel will be felt by their own folks...and not by one of them getting upset over it.
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 04:47 PM
 
Location: Brentwood, Tennessee
43,206 posts, read 41,812,025 times
Reputation: 82987
Quote:
Originally Posted by cindersslipper View Post
Perhaps make sure there actually is a problem, THEN start a thread....?
She already did, last week. She knows his mom doesn't like her.

I think my fiance's mom doesnt like me!
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
 
Old 03-14-2015, 04:50 PM
 
Location: My House
34,592 posts, read 28,962,017 times
Reputation: 25581
Maybe if this hasn't been sprung on her, she would have reacted differently.
__________________
When in doubt, check it out: FAQ
Reply With Quote Quick reply to this message
Please register to post and access all features of our very popular forum. It is free and quick. Over $68,000 in prizes has already been given out to active posters on our forum. Additional giveaways are planned.

Detailed information about all U.S. cities, counties, and zip codes on our site: City-data.com.


Reply
Please update this thread with any new information or opinions. This open thread is still read by thousands of people, so we encourage all additional points of view.

Quick Reply
Message:

Over $104,000 in prizes was already given out to active posters on our forum and additional giveaways are planned!

Go Back   City-Data Forum > General Forums > Relationships
Follow City-Data.com founder on our Forum or

All times are GMT -6.

2005-2019, Advameg, Inc. · Please obey Forum Rules · Terms of Use and Privacy Policy · Bug Bounty

City-Data.com - Archive 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35 - Top