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The young lady I'm "not dating" (silly me, I thought watching movies together, going places, doing things, me taking her to diner counted as dating.) had a bad breakup more recently and soon we are going to "go on our first date"
No worries, if it doesn't work one of my FWB is going through a divorce, she and I will keep each other company if this doesn't work out.
That's who mine was. I wasn't too interested, and either the guy knew that and let it go, or the feeling was mutual and he wasn't feeling it for me either.
But set-ups tend to be awkward. It feels staged and unnatural, and seems a bit desperate. So that, along with online dating aren't preferred methods for me.
And, usually when people set you up, they do it according to who they think you should be with, not who they actually think you'd like. Least it's that way with my mother. Like the last guy, she figured I should give that a shot since I don't have the men beating down my door. So I went on the meet-up, and still wasn't interested, like I knew I wouldn't be. lol Then there's another guy she wanted to set me up with, where she and the guy's mother discussed us dating. And I never once told her I was interested in said guy, so it was a tad forward of her to be scheming that up.
So for many with set-ups, it's the "Beggars can't be chosers" mentality where they feel you should be grateful for anything they find for you, rather than actually considering if said person would really be interested, in terms of physical attractiveness and personality, how they carry themselves, etc.
I think in most cases, if you really look deep down, it's usually mutual. Of course, there are exceptions, but it's usually both parties that aren't really feeling it.
I do think a lot of set-ups are awkward just because the party that's trying to arrange it pressures each person to go out with each other. They also pump up the person as much as they can. Of course, a set up can involve two people really hitting it off, but I see that as being rare.
I had a short and very disappointing relationship this past fall. I should've known better. I was doing so well, and I was an idiot for trying it again.
So it's been about 4 months since I've been on any kind of date.
I attended 1 coffee date and 1 dinner date over a year ago, both a first date with different men. Have not been on any dates since, and haven't really "dated" since before I was married ... so, 2002-2003?
Location: SF Bay Area, aka, Liberal Mecca/wherever DoD sends me to
713 posts, read 1,081,577 times
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1 year and based on my environment, I'll rather be left alone than date. I'm not attracted to the type of females around me. I meet good girls but I find them to be foreigners or out of staters visiting.
I left my ex fiance last year, been about 6 mos and I don't miss dating.
And quite honestly, I'm happier single. I'm done with men.
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